Falling Through
by Lampyridae92
Summary: SILLINESS WARNING! Apparently, it IS possible to fall into a movie! Remmy and I are going 3D, people! Now certain aliens have to survive two teens in the once evil Lair! If you don't like it silly, stand clear! But if you are into laughing, take a look.
1. Chapter 1

"Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."~ Ludwig Wittgenstein

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**Falling Through**

**Chapter one: Ice**

The best day ever...

Oh, behold the irony! I growled as I picked up my backpack. Well, 'picked up' wasn't the right phrase. Today, it weighted 15 kilos. For some reason, my teachers always managed to give out bunch of homework all at the same time! Two weeks without even a calculation to do, and then it all comes falling down on me!

I had woken up that morning with the worst teenage mood you could imagine. I practically snarled at my mother when she came to get me up. Then I spent five minutes in front of the bathroom mirror only focusing about the fact that I was a bit chubby, totally overlooking all those things I actually love about myself. My eyes, my cute nose, my curves and my thick brown hair were suppressed by my dark mood.

Then I went to school to participate in another day with boring subjects and just as boring teachers, knowing that there would be no friends waiting for my arrival. Not that I didn't have friends; it's just that neither of them went to my school.

And after suffering through a long, hard day, I headed home, my mood possibly even darker than this morning.

Have you ever been in the Norwegian countryside during springtime? I have one word for you: ice. Walking home, I had to be very careful where I stepped. It was all uphill, and I knew that if I fell forward, the heavy backpack would crush me against the asphalt. To make it better, the government had tried to make it less slippery by using gravel on the ice. I can tell you right now, it doesn't always work. Instead you end up scratching up your hands when you try to catch yourself as you fall.

God, why did I have to be so blue today? It was Friday! The weekend was about to start! I should be thrilled!

'_Why?' _my brain asked. _'What are you going to do this weekend anyway? Sit in your bedroom and surf the net? _

_'I'm gonna write stories!' _I tried._'Yeah. Another hobby to do alone! You need to get laid, girl!'_

I blushed badly of my own thoughts. Hell, my hormones were kicking in again!

'_Shut the F up...'_

My brain giggled back at me. _'Pathetic!'_

Goddammit! Even my own mind was turning against me today! I sighed and stopped to watch the view; snowy mountains covered with forest. It was very pretty, really. But nothing could get my mood up today.

How long was it since my life was normal? I thought back and decided on kindergarten. Before the boys started to call me names and before I lost my confidence. I had never been bullied like those kids on TV, but words can sting just as bad as getting beaten up. Because of them, I was who I was. Problems making friends, and scared of what my classmates might be saying behind my back.

I wouldn't pretend my life is all black, not at all. But it was no paradise either.

My favourite hobby was to dream. Whenever I got the chance, I escaped into another reality. Either by listening to music or by writing stories. Dreaming was the only thing keeping me sane. If I couldn't escape on a daily basis, I'd go crazy.

Sometimes I'd dream myself into a movie or a book I liked. I'd visited Hogwarts and I'd been in The Court of Miracles. Hell, I'd even beaten up my share of enemies in Lord of the Rings!

The newest addiction was 'Megamind'. To be honest, I couldn't remember being this obsessed about a movie ever before! The past couple of months, I'd seen the movie nine times, made two AMV's and written more than 20 stories. All proof about how much spare time I had.

Why on earth had I fallen in love with this movie? Easy; I could resemble myself to the main character. The underdog. The person who was left out of life. Maybe the reason I was so obsessed was because I hoped for a happy ending for myself as well? I too hoped to be let into society and of course, I too dreamed about finding love! After all, I _am _a hopeless romantic! Well, I am when I'm not in my worst, darkest, most hormonal mood.

"It will get better soon," I told myself, whispering just in case someone was nearby. "Next semester."

A flame of hope lightened inside of me and tugged my lips to the first smile that day. In August, my life would change. I was going to a folk high school to take a year of writing studies. Can you imagine? A whole year doing what I liked best, meeting people with the same interests as me, learning how to use my skills properly!

The clouds inside of me were slowly letting go.

"I'm going to go home, do some homework, go for a walk and then try to finish my story," I said to myself, thinking of my latest Fanfiction. With renewed happiness, I began my walk again. My brain went into author-mode and began working on my story while I smiled.

As a Norwegian, you learn one important thing from the moment you learn to walk; when it's late winter, _always _be careful where you step! Unfortunately I was already so deep inside my own thoughts and dreams, that I didn't notice how I stepped on a spot of clear, hard ice.

For a millisecond I was flying. My arms waved, my feet left the ground and I let out a surprised gasp. I instinctively closed my eyes, waiting for the hard impact. Oh, this was going to be _painful!_

The fall was surprisingly long. Too long, actually. I slowly opened up one eye...

"_Åh, fy faen!__" _I swore.

There were no Norwegian mountains, no forest and no ice. My whole world was gone and replaced with endless blue light.

"_Åh, herregud, herregud, herregud..." _I mumbled and clung onto my computer bag. My body was still falling thought the strange blueness; I could feel it in my stomach. _"Herregud, herregud, herregud!"_

I tried to look down, but there was nothing to look at!

"Hello? Anyone?" I tried. "Anyone at all?."

"Here!" a voice called from somewhere to my left. I turned and saw a figure somewhere in the distance. Whoever it was, he or she was waiving at me. The person came closer and closer, or maybe it was me who was moving? It was hard to tell when there was nothing else around.

When we were close enough to truly see each other, the first thing I noticed was the fact that this girl was wearing freaking pyjamas! I mean, if _you _met someone while endlessly falling, would you expect this person to be wearing her pyjamas? There was something strangely familiar about her, something I couldn't quite place.

"Hello, there!" she said with an accent which instantly made me think of 'Home and Away', the show my mother watched every afternoon. The girl didn't seem scared at all over the fact that we were falling though endless light.

"Uhm... Hi... Wait, I know you!" I said, suddenly remembering seeing her once in a YouTube video. "RemmyBlack?"

She grinned. "BFire92?"

I started to laugh. Of all the people you could meet when falling into a strange world of blue light, I didn't expect to meet the Australian girl I had discussed the movie 'Megamind' with online.

"Oh my god! Didn't expect to see you here! Well, to be honest, I didn't expect to see myself here. But... what's the deal with the pyjamas?"

Remmy rolled her eyes. "It's the middle of the night in Australia! I just fell asleep and woke up here," she said and did a gesture towards the blueness. "And what's the deal with the coat and scarf?"

"It's March. It's early spring back home now," I explained. "So, where do you suppose we're going?" Again I tried to look down into the endlessness.

"Ah, come _on, _Fire! What is the one thing the two of us have in common?"

I scratched my hair, thinking. "We're both teenagers with a weird fascination of 3D alien's personal business?" I asked, referring to our messages. To be honest, Remmy and I had talked quite a lot about the male characters in the movie we both had a strange obsession over. After all, we were teens.

Remmy rolled her eyes. "Almost there!"

I blinked a couple of times as the realization of what she meant came over me.

"No!"

"Yes!" she grinned. "Oh, this is gonna be totally _awesome!"_

**

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Silliness has been written... Hey, you was warned!

So, Remmy and I began talking. And now we talk a lot. And you DON'T want to know what we are talking about! But if you are curious, you should keep reading. Believe me, the topic WILL come up. And so will probably the ratings.

Remmy's writing too! Make sure to check hers out!

And now, lean back and prepare yourself. Remmy and I are going 3D-style!


	2. Chapter 2

"Don't be over self-confident with your first impressions of people."~ Chinese Proverb

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Falling Through

**Chapter 2: Hard Impact**

"Minion! Come and see my newest invention!"

"Coming, Sir!"

The fish pushed the button on the washer and started the laundry before he went to see what his master had come up with. Megamind had been working non-stop again; woke up at five in the morning before and went straight to work. It was already midnight, and Minion was pleased to hear that the hero had finally finished.

Sometimes Megamind could work for days without sleeping. But occasions like that were luckily fewer these days. They had finally found a way to make him take a break. It seemed Megamind's weakness was a certain brunette. All Minion had to do was give her a call, and she would show up and drag the blue alien with her out for some fresh air and something to eat. He would have called Roxanne this time too, but she had been so busy working herself.

Minion walked in to find his master standing in front of a new invention. Black spots of oil were spilled over his giant head and there were stains of grease on his suit. He was cleaning his hands with a towel while eying the eight foot tall thing. It had a wall filled with buttons and from the top a ring, about four feet in diameter, pointed out; almost like the ring the curtain hangs from in a shower.

"Isn't it a beauty?"

"Sure, Sir!" Minion agreed. "But what is it?"

"This, my fishy friend, is going to change public transportation! It's a _portal!" _Megamind threw away the towel and walked up to the portal. "You just stand under it, turn it on, and it will move you to wherever its twin is located! The portal is up there," he said and pointed at the ring. Minion looked up into it to find that the ring was filled with a strange blue light.

"And where _is _the twin, Sir?"

"Oh, I haven't made it yet."

The space fish frowned and crossed his arms.

"So, if anyone would happen to stand under here, where would they end up?"

Megamind blinked. "No idea..."

"Sir, is it possible that there's an opening to this portal somewhere, and we have no idea where is?"

It was easy to tell that this was something the genius hadn't considered. He was scratching his goatee, thinking hard.

"It's possible, I guess..."

"Sir!"

"Well, I never considered the possibility!"

Minion sighed.

"Well, then we should probably turn this thing of, don't you think?"

"Good idea, Minion!"

Rolling his eyes, the fish reached out a robotic arm to turn the switch with 'On' and 'Off' marked. There were times he had to wonder how much of a genius Megamind really was. He never got the chance to turn off the portal. Suddenly something fell out of the ring in the top and landed hard on the concrete floor with a 'thump'.

"Ouch!"

"_Svarte faen!"_

Both aliens froze. It seemed two teenagers were lying under the portal, their arms and legs tangled together. This was _not _a common sight in the Lair.

"Fire, your elbow is in my _eye!" _one of them, a girl with curly hair and wearing pyjamas, said and tried to remove said elbow.

"I can't move! My backpack is crushing me!" the other groaned from the inside of a beanie that had fallen down over her face.

Minion sighed.

"Sir. Why on earth did you turn it on before making a twin?"

"I had to check if it worked!" Megamind said frustrated. "Turn it off before anyone else shows up. And do you have the spray?"

The fish turned off the portal and the blue light in the ring disappeared. "No, it's empty."

"Then use the forget-me-stick, Minion!"

Minion gawked. "I can't, Sir!"

"Why not?"

"I can't hit two _girls!"_

"I'm 18 and a young adult, if you please!" the girl inside the beanie corrected. She had a weird strong accent which told that she clearly wasn't English. Megamind groaned.

"Hah! I was right!" the pyjama-girl squealed. "We're here, Fire! We're in the movie!"

"Whuuut?" The 'young adult' finally freed herself from her beanie, still held down by her heavy backpack, and looked up to stare straight into Megamind's green eyes. _"Åh dæven!"_ she said as her jaw dropped.

Megamind blinked. "What?"

The girl in the pyjamas managed to get up and stare at the blue alien.

"Wow! This is so cool!" she said and reached out a hand to touch the giant blue head.

Megamind slapped it away.

"Hey! Personal space, if you don't mind!"

The other girl tried to get up as well, but fell over a couple of times thanks to the backpack before she got on her feet.

"But... But... This isn't even possible!" The two girls shared a look – one of utter happiness and the other in shock.

"Remmy! Your face!" The beanie-girl gasped and looked down at herself, at her hands and then touched her face. "Oh my god! We've been 3D'ed! Gosh, my eyes are _huge!"_

Megamind and Minion stared, first at the two girls, then at each other.

"Please, Minion, use the stick!"

"_Awesome!" _the pyjama-girl cheered.

"Don't you even _dare!"_ the beanie-girl growled and pointed at Minion. He flinched and showed his palms. This girl was not one to be taken lightly.

"No stick!" he said, trying to calm her down. After all, she did look terrified, and terrified people often do stupid things. Like beating up fish!

"_Minion!" _A couple of arms were suddenly around his sphere and he had to take a step back to regain his balance. The girl with the pyjamas had thrown herself at him and was now hanging from his sphere with her feet two feet off the ground.

"Oh! Um... Hi?" He turned to his master. "She knows my name!"

The blue alien seemed rather confused and didn't say anything, but the other girl explained.

"Remmy's a huge fan," she said, and let her backpack fall to the floor. It gave out a sound that confirmed its heaviness.

"A fan?" Minion asked, and looked at the teen around his neck. Remmy, was it?

"So you've heard of us?" Megamind looked at the girl who was now checking that her computer was still intact.

"Well, yes. We... well..." she coughed to clear her throat. "We're fans of the movie."

"Movie?"

"Yes, er, funny story. You're a movie back home."

He blinked. "Back home? Where are you from? What movie?"

The girl swallowed and looked at her friend, who was still hanging around Minion's sphere, for help.

"Remmy, could you please explain it? I think I need to sit down for a bit," she said and sat down on her backpack, rubbing her temples.

"Oh, of course, Fire!" Remmy said, and let go of Minion. "OK, we are Remmy and Fire..."

"That's a couple of weird names," Megamind stated, but neither of them seemed to get offended.

"They are our usernames. We met online. So, back in our... what, dimension?" Remmy wondered and looked at Fire, who shrugged her shoulders.

"I guess we can call it that."

"OK. In our _dimension _you two are characters in a movie. And we are huge fans of it!"

There was a pause. Then both Megamind and Minion started to laugh.

"Oh, that one is priceless!" Megamind said, and leaned against the robotic body of his friend.

"Good one, girls," the fish giggled.

Remmy crossed her arms.

"I'm telling the truth!"

"Yeah, right. And I can fly!" Megamind wiped a tear.

"It is..." Fire said with a tired voice. "I've got the movie right here."

The laugher stopped and every one turned their eyes to the girl with the computer on her lap.

"What?" the aliens asked and the girl squealed.

"Right here. Isn't it weird? Kind of ironic. A movie in a movie." Fire scratched her head. "Does this mean we're a movie too now?"

"Let's see!" Remmy said and placed herself beside Fire. The aliens came to stand behind them and looked down at the screen. It was now showing a rather weird scene, where the same fish that was in the room were faking his own death.

"_Oh, oh, oh, I'm going! I think this is it..."_

"Hey! I remember that!" Minion said cheerfully. "That was a lot of fun!"

"No!" the girls choired.

"First time I saw it, I thought you really died!" Fire said. "It was sad! But it's kind of funny _now, _now that we know it was all an act."

"We were _filmed?" _the genius whined."All along? There had to be hundreds of hidden cameras!"

"Well," Remmy tried. "Back home, this movie was _made. _It's an animation. So no cameras, only computers."

"Sir, I think they are telling the truth."

There was an awkward pause.

"So... We're a movie?" mused Megamind.

"In _our _world! Here you are real. Hmm, maybe _we_ are the movie when we're here." Fire stared into the air while philosophising.

"OK, then! Let's get you two home! Stand under the portal and we'll zap you right back to your crazy upside down world!" Megamind grabbed the girls by their ears and got them on their feet.

"What? Can't we stay a bit longer? I've never been in a movie before!" Remmy whined.

"Straight home you go!" he said and pushed the girls towards the portal.

"My backpack, I gotta have my books!"

"You can't send us home _now!"_

"All of my work is on that computer!"

"There's no way I'm going back!"

"My teachers will _kill me _if I lose all those things!"

"Don't force us back there! _I like it here!"_

"Sorry, girls, but…bye, bye!"

The sound of an explosion filled the air in the Lair and echoed between the walls. A pressure pushed everyone down to the ground and they covered their eyes to shield them from the light.

It was over in a couple of seconds. Blinking, they sat up to look at the portal. Or the _remains _of it. A black spot showed where it had been standing and the pieces were spread around the lair. Brainbots immediately began picking them up.

"Wow," Fire said under her breath. Remmy grinned.

"Good timing!"

"My portal! What did you two _do?_ Minion, help me gather the pieces!"

"Eh, _excuse me! _We didn't do _anything!" _Fire growled and put her hands on her hips.

"Apparently, destiny wanted us to stay," said Remmy, very satisfied with the turn of events.

With his hands filled with tiny parts, Megamind snarled. "You must have done _something!"_

"Well, we didn't! You can't blame us! Apparently you made a mistake while putting that thing together!" Fire snarled back and began helping picking up pieces.

"She's right, Sir, it was hardly their fault!"

The frustrated inventor growled. It felt good to have someone else to blame but himself.

"Fine!" He straightened up and looked at the empty spot where the portal had been.

"Does this mean we can stay?" Remmy grinned.

"Seems like it," Megamind mumbled.

"Wait a moment! The portal just blew up! How are we gonna get home?" Fire's eyes were wide in worry and she stared at Megamind.

"I'll have to build a new one."

"How long is that going to take?"

"The portal was based on old inventions and parts. It could take a while."

"A while? _A while? _How long is 'a while'?" Pressing her hands filled with tiny pieces against her chest, Fire's breath quickened.

"Probably weeks."

"Err, Sir," Minion said. "I don't want you to work for weeks without rest! Both of us know you have a terrible habit of not taking enough brakes, and you have a city to guard."

"OK, so months then." Megamind wasn't very trilled about the way things were going. Having two teenage girls here for such a long time wasn't his idea of fun, but Minion had a point.

"_Months? _But, but... I've got exams and... _åh, herregud, herregud!"_

"Months? Oh my God, this is totally _awesome!" _

The girl's reactions were complete opposites. While Remmy's smile spread across her face, Fire seemed truly worried.

Noticing how troubled the older of the two girls seemed, Minion laid a hand on her shoulder.

"It's going to be OK. We'll get you home eventually. And in the meantime, we'll look after you," he comforted her, just as his nature demanded of him. Fire gave him a weak smile.

"Thank you, Minion. And after all-" She did a gesture towards her backpack. "I've got all my books in there, so I won't miss any important work."

"Wow," Remmy said. "You've just fallen into our favourite movie and you are thinking about _homework!"_

"My parents are teachers," Fire explained, giving it all sense.

"Well," Megamind sighed. "If you two are going to stay here for a while, I guess we'd better grant you a bedroom."

Following Minion to a place they could sleep, Fire laid a hand on Remmy's shoulder and whispered "Remmy, I _beg _you not to mention my Fanfiction to anyone while we're here!"

She owned a confused look.

"What? Why?"

"Come on, Remmy, I don't want to tell Megamind that I've been writing smutty stories about him and his girlfriend! He'd dehydrate me and throw me into a desert somewhere!"

"Point taken. Wait, does this mean we can't bug them with embarrassing questions either! After all, the two of us has discussed _very _private topics these two months we've been friends, and I'd really like to find some answers!"

Giving her a wink, Fire approved. "Be my guest, Remmy!"

**

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******

Silliness is STILL written! So there it goes: Remmy and I have moved into the Lair!

Yes, I know, I'm a nerd... And Remmy... Remmy is just weird!

Yes, I'll call myself Fire though this whole thing. In the real world, I also go by the name of Guppy. One, two, three... what was we talking about?

But I have to agree with Remmy on something. This IS going to be TOTALY awesome!


	3. Chapter 3

"The rate at which a person can mature is directly proportional to the embarrassment he can tolerate." ~Douglas Engelbart

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Falling Through

**Chapter 3: Internet**

I stepped into Megamind's idea area. In the night, all colours were deep and blue, but it still looked amazing. I remembered seeing it for the first time when I watched the movie. Even then it had gotten to me. The way his ideas were spread in the air, the way the colours made the place light and beautiful in a contrast to the dark Lair had amazed me. I'd written about it so many times in my stories, I was certain people would get bored of it soon.

Finding a chair, _the_ leather chair, I sat down with a sigh. My brain wasn't tired. After all, when I had fallen through the portal, it had been 3.45 in the afternoon. But when I had arrived here, it had been midnight. Remmy had fallen straight to sleep, since she was still on Australia our-world-time. And in her pyjamas, of course. Megamind had gone to his bedroom, wherever that was, and Minion was powering down somewhere. In other words, I was alone with my thoughts.

I opened the computer I had brought with me and turned it on. After all, now that I was here, I might as well watch the 'Megamind' movie for the tenth time. Maybe I'd find a few important facts that would come in useful?

My eyes drifted over the screen. The picture was of Megamind and Roxanne... How ironic! I decided to change it. After all, I didn't want to freak out our host too much, Remmy would take care of that soon enough.

I looked at the settings on my computer. A notepad, my calendar, a slideshow of my pictures and a watch.

"Huh, quarter to four," I mumbled to myself. Then I froze.

3.45. The watch on my computer clearly stated 3.45! That was when I had walked home from school! No more than an hour ago! In other words, my computer was still on my-world-time.

What did that mean? Did time stand still as long as I was here? Well, in that case I wouldn't have to worry about explaining my disappearance to my parents when I got home. And if I did some homework, I'd even get ahead of my class.

Something else suddenly caught my attention. I had internet!

I opened explorer and my front page showed up.

It wasn't the fact that I had internet that disturbed me. And it wasn't the fact that it opened on the right page. What truly scared me were the pictures!

When Remmy and I had arrived, I had been surprised to find that we had changed. My features weren't as detailed as they should and my eyes had grown huge.

But for some reason, my computer hadn't changed a bit! The pictures were all normal, of Norwegian celebrities with detailed faces and tiny eyes. I sat for a second to try and figure out what this meant, then I opened Deviantart.

Also here the pictures were just as they should! I went onto my profile. Everything was as it should be, with detailed photos.

Then a horrible thought occurred to me! I opened Fanfiction and went into my profile.

The messages were there. The messages between me and Remmy. Every detail. Words like 'retraceable', 'blue', and 'tentacles' hit me like a ton of bricks.

"Oh no... Oh no, no, no!"

I went into my profile and scrolled down the pages to find my stories. My heart stopped as I saw the title of the first Fanfiction I had ever written. And not only that, it had been the very first smutty story I had ever made!

To make it worse, it was about a certain blue alien and his reporter girlfriend.

The same alien I now lived with.

The same alien that happened to own a De-gun.

Still with a tiny hint of hope, I opened it. Maybe the story wouldn't come up? Maybe I wasn't able to read it in this world? Maybe, maybe...

It opened with white letters on a black background, the way I had set it because it was more comfortable for my eyes. I read the first line:

'_What is better than to sit on the couch barefoot when it's raining outside?'_

"No..." With eyes wide in horror, I scrolled down. "No, no, no!"

'_A soft growl in her ear from Megamind as she came down to (and under) his underwear."_

I shot down the screen on the computer and stared into the night. How many stories of that kind had I written? Only three which went into deep details. Several more with a hint of it. Even more who pointed towards it.

I pictured myself as a tiny blue cube left in Sahara, dry and alone.

"He must _never _find out!"

* * *

**I bet fifthy bucks that he'll find out! You in? :D**

**And once again: remember to read RemmyBlack's version as well! If you read both stories, you might get seveal details about us that might come in handy. So even if they won't always fit together, they are connected. It's the same story, but different writers ^^**


	4. Chapter 4

**It's difficult to decide whether growing pains are something teenagers have - or are. ~Author Unknown****  
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Chapter 4: Weird and Disturbing

Roxanne didn't mind getting up early on Saturdays, especially if she was planning on visiting a once evil lair to see her fishy friend and blue boyfriend.

She was never afraid she'd be alone there. Minion would always be up, no matter how early she arrived. Megamind, on the other hand, could sometimes sleep in until the afternoon. Other mornings he would have been up for hours inventing. She never bothered to call and ask. If Megamind was sleeping, there was always Minion to spend time with. Who would have thought a fish would be such an interesting friend?

Living in a life which contained aliens, superheroes and giant robots, Roxanne had learned that surprises could come at any time. They could come while eating breakfast or during an interview. Once she'd been coming out of the shower, singing 'Supervillain' by Nicole Scherzinger, and she'd been surprised to find Megamind in her living room having heard everything (and blushing badly). That was back when she was the damsel-in-distress and being kidnapped by him had been a weekly event.

In other words, Roxanne was not the girl who would be easily startled. Been there, done that.

But when she stepped into the Lair and suddenly stood face to face with a teenage girl wearing shorts and a comfortable big T-shirt, she had to admit that her jaw had dropped. After all, the only human who usually entered the Lair was herself. The only exception was that time they'd found Bernard in the washer.

The two stood frozen for a second, staring at each other.

In the next moment, Roxanne was being strangled in a strong hug given to her by this mysterious teen.

"Oh my god, Roxanne! It's so cool to meet you!"

The girl let go and held the wide eyed Roxanne on an arm's length.

"I have so many questions! Oh, oh; what does Megamind's junk look like?"

Roxanne felt her jaw drop down another two inches by the question.

"What... I... I..."

"_Herregud da, Remmy!"_ The teenager was suddenly pulled away from Roxanne as another girl appeared. This one was at least properly dressed in her hoodie and jeans.

"Remmy, you can't just ask her that! You've got to butter her up first, _then _you can ask! Otherwise you're just going to scare her."

"I'm not scaring her!" the first girl cried. "Am I Roxanne?"

Frozen to the ground, the reporter only stared wide eyed at them. There was a pause.

"See, Remmy, you've scared her!" With an apologizing look, the dressed girl turned to Roxanne. "I am so sorry, Miss Ritchi. My friend here was dropped on her head when she was an infant."

"I was not!"

"Well, you could have fooled me," she growled.

"What is going on he- Oh, Roxanne!"

The reporter turned her head and saw Megamind standing in the hall, looking from her to the teenagers and back, unsecure about the situation and the state of his girlfriend.

"Hey, I see you've met Remmy and Fire. Hope they didn't _insult you or anything!"_ He gave the teens a strict look.

"We would _never!" _Remmy assured him, but he clearly wasn't convinced.

"Megs," Roxanne finally said and crossed her arms. "Care to explain?"

* * *

Roxanne had another needy sip of her strong coffee. Then she inhaled and exhaled, feeling the caffeine take a tighter grip around her brain.

"Can I have that one more time?"

From the other side of the kitchen table, Megamind took a deep breath before summing up the story.

"I wanted to improve public transportation by using portals. In order to check that it worked I turned it on-"

"Before making a twin!" Minion added, and his master sent him a glare.

"Yes, thank you for pointing that out, Minion."

"You're welcome."

Rolling his eyes, he kept going. "It turned out not having a twin to the portal caused it to open entrances into a whole other dimension. And accidentally these two-" He did a gesture towards the teens, who grinned and waived as if they hadn't been introduced earlier. "-fell in and ended up here."

"And then the portal exploded!" Fire ended.

"Yes, then the portal exploded..." the inventor mumbled. He'd prefer if that fades had gone unmentioned. "So now we are kind of stuck with them."

"Hey!" Remmy said over her cup of coco. "You make it sound like a punishment!"

A look from the alien clearly told her that the visit was _not _welcomed. Roxanne eyed the teenagers and shook her head to get her thoughts into place.

"This story is both weird and disturbing."

Fire grinned. "Kind of like Remmy!"

"Hey!"

Minion giggled. To be honest, he found these girls kind of amusing. Weird, yes, but in a good way.

"But, Sir, I think since these two are going to stay here for a while, there is a need to go shopping." The fish gestured towards the youngest in the group. "After all, Remmy only has her pyjamas."

"I can take them," Roxanne offered. "I need to get some things anyway."

"Grand! We are going shopping with Roxanne Ritchi!" Remmy squealed.

"I really have to get some other shoes. I came in my winter's outfit, and it's much warmer here," added the second girl. "But-" Fire pointed at Remmy. "You can't go out like that! Not that you're not cute in shorts and T-shirt, but it's not very appropriate."

"She can borrow a pair of boots and a holowatch." Minion said, and poured more coffee into his bowl, swimming around in order to drink the liquid before it mixed with the water.

"Great," Roxanne finished her coffee. "Let's go to the mall! You guys want to come?"

"_No!" _both males cried.

"We had an accident there last week," Megamind mumbled, avoiding her eyes.

"Accident?"

"Let's just say it's for the best if we stay far away from the electronics store for a while," Minion said. "And we have work to do anyway."

"Yes, let's get to work, Minion!" Megamind rose from his chair and emptied his mug of coffee in one sip. Placing a peck of his girlfriends cheek, he whispered a "Good luck, Roxanne."

The girls chose to overhear what he said and instead made a long "Aw!"

"We're romantics," Fire explained to Minion. "Can't help it." He nodded in understanding. They had all gotten used to outbursts like that during the time Megamind and Roxanne had been official.

With the boys all gone to do whatever heroes and space fish do, Roxanne turned to the girls.

"So, are you ready to go?"

"Oh yes! But before we do-" Remmy leaned across the table and both girls grinned their mischievous smiles. "What _does _Megamind's junk look like?"

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**The part about Roxanne singing 'Supervillain' is from one of '1992's stories ^^ I really enjoyed reading that one.**

**Yes, what DOES it look like? A question Remmy and I have been discussing in our messages. She too will be taking up the topic in her version of this story; 'Living in 3D'.**

**Well, what do you think? Blue? Tentacles? Retractable? Feel free to tell me. After all, we are all pervs deep inside. You might as well embrace it.**


	5. Chapter 5

"Have you ever gotten the feeling that you aren't completely embarassed yet, but you glimpse tomorrow's embarrassment?"~ Tom Cruise

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**Chapter 5- Milkshake**

"God, I _love _this holowatch!" Remmy announced as she waived teasingly to a group of boys. They all stared after her as if Minion had just given them a round of the forget-me-stick. "I've never had this much attention before," she said and did a throw of her new, long blond hair.

"Really?" Fire asked. "Not even when you got up and _danced _in the cinema?"

Roxanne gawked. "You did that?" This girl was either very bold... or just plain insane. For some reason, she found herself believing it was the latter of the two options.

Remmy didn't answer. "But now that I have clothes again, I think I want to go and turn back into myself. Even though it's nice to look like a super model, I prefer my own body."

"Hold it, Skittles! Look over there; it's one of those places where you _make _you a T-shirt! I've always wanted to do that. What do you say?"

"Skittles?" Roxanne had just fallen off. "I thought it was 'Remmy'?"

"That too. Remember, neither 'Fire', 'Remmy', 'Skittles' or 'Buttercup' are our real names," declared Remmy.

"Buttercup?" Roxanne mumbled to herself; the girls had already gone to get their own personal T-shirts. Oh well, she was already girlfriend with "Megamind", so a few more fake names wouldn't be a big problem.

Fire came out, showing of her new shirt: red with 'Keep Dreaming' in black and silhouettes of flying birds.

"I've always wanted to do this," she said. "It's so much cooler when it's one-of-a-kind."

"Where's Remmy?" It seemed the other girl had completely disappeared. Had a group of horny teenage boys kidnapped her or something?

"She went to change. Oh, there she is and... _Åh, fy søren!_" The rest of the sentence disappeared into a strangled giggle. Turning around, Roxanne saw Remmy coming out of the Ladies' toilets, and immediately followed Fire into the laughter.

"You like?" Remmy did a proud pirouette to show of the T-shirt. On black fabric, next to a red heart, it stood in green 'MINION'.

"He's _so_ going to blush when he sees that!" Roxanne managed to get out under her laughter. She should have brought a camera so she could have taken a picture of the fish when he saw it!

"_Priceless!" _was all Fire could say before falling back into laughter. If you could call it laughter; she was practically strangling. Watching the girl actually made the scene even weirder and funnier.

"Breath, Fire. You know fire requires oxygen to burn," Remmy said, chuckling, and laid a hand on her friend's back. Taking long deep breaths filled with giggling, the girl finally managed to straighten up, wiping off some tears.

"_Latterkrampe," _she explained in a language Roxanne didn't understand. "I hope to either die in my sleep, or while laughing my heart out. _Dæven, _Remmy! You deserve a milkshake after actually _buying_ that T-shirt!"

"Well, it _is _Megamind's money, so why not. To the milkshake! And the carrots!"

"Cravings. It's that time of month," Fire stage whispered to Roxanne behind her hand.

Yes, these girls were definitely not sane. Not sane at all.

Roxanne rather liked to go to the mall with Remmy and Fire. It had been a long time since the last time she'd been out with girlfriends. With constant kidnappings and a bunch of work, her social life had been almost dead for the past years. There were nights she'd gone out with some friends from work, but those occasions were rare. God damn, her lunch brakes were the most social things she'd done before she became girlfriend to Megamind and friends with Minion! But they were still guys, and sometimes you just need girlfriends.

Roxanne watched the two teenagers discussing kiddie-shows over their milkshakes.

"_Hey Arnold!_ Now _there's _a good show!" Fire claimed and had a sip through her straw.

"No, no! He's scary! You've got to see _Invisible Network of Kids_."

The reporter hid her giggle. Watching them made her wish she too was young and stupid again. She leaned back and listened to them, trying to pick up their personalities. At first sight, they seemed kind of alike. Both were clearly not quite normal. But then again, what was normal?

Even though, her reporter skills noted a couple of differences. When Remmy seemed to be fully up and on the top, Fire was clearly a shyer person. And of course there was an age difference that had to be considered. Not by much, but maybe a couple of years?

Listening to them was weird for Roxanne, because of their accents. She was used to American, but here she had an Australian and a...European accent of some kind.

"Say that one more time, Remmy. You're talking way too fast for me. Norwegian here..."

OK, so a Norwegian.

Roxanne sipped her milkshake. Yes, this really was nice. Out shopping with the...

"Hey, Roxanne! You didn't answer the question earlier."

She looked up. Both girls were studying her with interest.

"What question?" Roxanne asked.

"About," Remmy began, and leaned over the table. "Megamind's junk!"

Her face flushed pink. Oh, she thought she'd been so smart when she had managed to wriggle out of it this morning! Cornered again.

"Girls, I'm not going to..."

"Ah, come on! We're dying here! Teenagers, remember."

"Remmy, I'm not..."

"Roxanne, let me just fill you in a bit," Fire interrupted, and placed her milkshake on the table in order to have her hands free to gesticulate. "Now, I totally understand that this is an awkward thing to answer, but you have Remmy here. _Remmy. _And she's not gonna let this go. The best thing you can do is to put her out of her misery and just tell her. Because it's not going to go."

Remmy put on an offended grimace.

"Hey, you make it sound like I'm the perv here! After all, I'm not the one writing sm-"

In a quick move, Fire had embraced Remmy's head in a one arm hug, pressing her palm against the younger girl's mouth.

"_Please shut up," _she begged with a low growl, but not low enough for Roxanne not to hear. Her brows knotted in suspicion; someone was hiding something.

Fire let go and calmly placed herself back into her seat.

"OK, so I'm curious too," she admitted.

"Hah, told you."

Rolling her eyes, Fire placed her chin in her hand and leaned forward against Roxanne.

"So, you want to put _us _out of our misery?"

Roxanne thought about it for a minute. How much did she trust them? After all, this was _really _personal.

"No, I won't tell you. At least, not before I've asked Megamind if it's OK."

The girls gave a groan in unison.

"Roxanne, please! We're _dying_ of curiosity here!" Remmy let herself fall over the table, faking her death. It was hard to hold in another laugh.

With her arms crossed and pursed lips, Roxanne too played the role as a drama queen. "Nope, won't tell."

"Fine! We'll put it aside. For _now_! It will come up again!" Fire said, pointing at her.

"Whaaat?" Remmy looked up at her friend in despair. "We're _putting it aside? _Fiiire!"

Petting her back, Fire assured her: "We just have to butter her up a bit longer. Don't worry, we'll find out, Remmy."

"OK, but if she doesn't tell-" Remmy stared at Roxanne. "I'm pulling down his pants!"

Blushing, Roxanne tried to look nonchalant when she had another mouthful of milkshake.

"Next question then," the youngest said. "Those tentacles... Are they Minion's thingy?"

The table was covered with the milkshake that had been filling up Roxanne's mouth.

"Eeew, Roxanne! _Ekkelt!_" Fire said, as she backed away.

"_What?"_ With wide eyes, Roxanne stared at them.

"Well, you know..." Remmy shrugged. "Fire here noticed the fact that he _does _have those two glowing balls down there and we just started to wonder..."

"I wouldn't know _that!" _Roxanne was horrified. Oh my god, didn't teenagers have _limits _anymore?

"We just wondered..."

"Well, then stop! I have no idea about Minion's... physiology! If you're that interested, then ask him!"

"You know what would have been cool," Fire mused, tipping the straw of her drink with a finger. "If Megamind was normal and Metro Man had tentacles."

Roxanne's jaw dropped and she looked from one girl to the other.

Remmy noticed her lightning struck appearance. "And you said _I _was scaring her earlier! Look at her now!"

"Remmy, you did scare her earlier. This time we scared her together. Now drink your milkshake. I still gotta get a pair of non-winter boots, and with my weird feet, that's gonna take a while."

In the end, when they returned to the Lair, Roxanne concluded that all in all, she'd had a really good time shopping with the teenagers.

Well, except for when they had the milkshakes. For some reason, she felt like she would never be able to drink milkshake ever again without thinking about Minion's... tentacles...

* * *

**Roxanne never drank milkshakes again...**

**Yes, Remmy and I HAVE discussed the topic of Minion's tentacles. What? Teenagers here!**

**Oh, and do you want to know what happened before Roxanne came? Remmy stole Megs' boots ^^ Read all about it in RemmyBlack's version of this story: 'Living in 3D'**

**Remmy claims she stood up and danced when she saw 'Megamind'. She is either lying, insane or bold. Anyway, I wish I was there to see it!  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**I don't have a sidekick- no Ed McMahon. So when I go out there, I'm lonley. It's scary. ~ Carson Daly**

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Chapter 6- So Much More

A pretty blond woman with teeth that were too white to be natural spoke on the monitors while Minion watched curiously.

"_Once again, it's our own hero Megamind we had to send our thanks to earlier today, when he defeated__ yet another villainous villain."_

A brunette man sat next to her agreed.

"_Seems like it, Shelley! You have to wonder how many people out there are stupid enough to challenge him."_

They did a fake laugh.

"_You are quite right, Mark. I don't think I'd ever dare to do that. But not only because of Megamind himself! Have you ever noticed those teeth on his sidekick, Minion? You have to be pre__tty dumb to get caught of those."_

"_You said it, Shelley. But now, over to Jocelyn and the weather."_

With a sigh, Minion leaned back against the couch that had been placed there during the last movie night. He closed his eyes and for once, let his mood take over for a minute.

It wasn't that Minion minded being the 'sidekick'. Not at all. His sole purpose in life was to look after his master, and when that master was a hero (or a villain), he immediately got the position of the sidekick. But for once, just once, he'd like people to see him as something else. He was so much more than just a helper.

Wasn't he?

"Something wrong?"

Spinning around inside his sphere, Minion turned to see who had just startled him. It was only Fire, her head tilted with a worried look. He let out a relieved breath.

"You scared me."

"Mm..." Sitting down on the couch beside him, Fire examined him, her thick brows entangled. "You're sad."

Trying to look somewhere else, he pretended to be nonchalant. "Nooo..."

"Minion?"

She caught his eyes again and stared at him for a minute, breaking down his inner barrier. Why were girls so good at doing that? With a groan, Minion let it out.

"I just wish people would see me as more than just a sidekick." He said it so fast it was difficult to hear.

Fire looked downright terrified that he felt that way!_ "Seriøst? _Minion, you are so much _more _than _just a sidekick_!"

"I am?"

"Yes, you-"

"Are we talking about Minion?"

A curly head suddenly popped up on the other side of Minion's sphere, making him jump with surprise. With eyes sparkling in curiosity and affection, Remmy had shown up out of nowhere.

"If it wasn't for me walking from that angle just two seconds ago, I'd think you were hiding behind the couch!" Fire looked around as if to see where on earth Remmy could have come out from so quickly.

"Can't blame a fan for stalking. And are we talking about Minion, or what?"

Minion was just going to point out something about the stalking part, but was interrupted.

"Yes we are, take a seat."

"All right!"

In a neat jump, Remmy got over the back of the couch and plumped down on the other side of the fish's robotic gorilla body.

"Minion feels like everyone only thinks of him as a sidekick!" Fire updated her friend.

"_No!_" If the first girl had been terrified, then Remmy acted like he'd gone crazy. "Minion! If you were only a _sidekick _would I have been a fan?"

"No?" Minion guessed. He hadn't expected such a dramatic reaction on his feelings. The girls were actually honestly disagreeing with him.

"Minion, you fantastic fish, you can't truly believe that. You are _so_ much more!" Pointing at Fire, as if to give her a cue, Remmy blinked. "Hit it, Fire!"

She only got a pair of rolling eyes. "Remmy, we didn't fall into a Disney musical. There's no way I'm singing here."

With a sigh and a glare, Remmy fell down a bit. "That's right... Not that I would want to sing anyway, but it would have been kind of cool."

Shaking her head, Fire overlooked the girl and turned back to Minion instead. "Minion, you are the _best friend, _the _guardian-"_

"The _cute one!"_ Remmy added, grinning from ear to ear.

A warm feeling spread in Minion's face. He looked at one of them to the other. "Really? I'm all that?"

"And much more," Fire ended.

There was a short moment of silence in order to let the new information sink in. A toothy smile slowly tugged his lips, and Minion felt his mood rise again. Grabbing each girl in an arm, he pulled them in for a hug.

"Thank you, girls!"

"You're welcome, Minion."

He'd only walked in to get a screw driver, but when Megamind saw the fish caught in a group hug with the two teenagers, he stopped. For a second he stood all still, watching the scene. Then Megamind grinned and quickly ran out of the room. Five seconds later he returned, dragging a confused Roxanne with him, placing a finger over his lips to tell her to stay quiet. She blinked a couple of times while taking in the whole scene. Not stopping, Megamind dragged her over to the couch, let go and placed his arms around the sphere. Roxanne smiled. Oh, weren't they sweet? Then she too joined in the Lair's first penta-hug.

* * *

**There's one thing I can't understand. In the trailers, they ALWAYS mention Brad Pitt as Metro Man. How many lines did Metro Man have? But how often do they mention David Cross as Minion, the beloved (and cute) space fish?**

**Yes, corny ending, but the picture in my head is so sweet, I had to include it :D**

**And I wanted to write some episodes in this story, instead of only making it with normal chapters.**


	7. Chapter 7

**"Reputation is character minus what you've been caught doing."~ Michael Iapoce****

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Chapter 7- Caught Red Handed

Part One

Megamind woke in the middle of the night. With a yawn he reached out and caught the watch on the bedside table. Twelve thirty? He'd only been asleep for twenty minutes. With a groan, he let his head fall back against the pillows. So it was going to be one of _those _nights, was it? One of those nights when you just can't fall asleep, and instead keep wide awake until morning.

Opening and closing his mouth, he felt how it was as dry as sandpaper. Great, nothing made falling asleep more difficult than getting up during the night. Megamind placed his feet on the floor, and a chill went through his body when he felt the coldness. Thank god for his bat slippers!

The kitchen was darker than a black mamba. He did a tired movement of his hand towards the switch and the light got on, revealing the kitchen... and someone else.

With a cookie in her mouth and an arm in the jar, Fire froze and stared at him.

There was a long, awkward pause while the two nighthawks didn't move an inch. Then...

"_ÅH HERREGUD! _GIANT ANTS!"

"What? WHERE?" Megamind spun around to see where she was pointing.

No ants. Not even giant ones.

Oh, geez...

He turned back into the kitchen. No Fire. No cookie jar. Only a few crumbs on the table. With a sigh he turned again and reached for the switch.

"I'm going back to bed."

Part Two

It was early morning. I was lounged on the couch, reading in my thick history book. Man, it felt good to know I would be ahead of the rest of the class when I got home! Hah, I would be able to take the rest of the year off! Of course, Remmy thought I was insane for studying while in one of my favourite movies, but what can I say? Living with teachers does things to you.

I was just about to finish the chapter about 'Europe: from dividing to uniting' when a sound caught my attention.

"Bow bow?" I lowered my book and saw a Brainbot hovered over me, looking down at the text book.

"Hi there!"

"Bow?" Its red camera eye moved from the book to me and back again.

"You like history? It's a really- _hei!"_

The Brainbot had gripped my history book and was flying off with it! I jumped off the couch in order to give chase.

"Come back! It's my book! _Søren klype!"_

The Brainbot disappeared around a corner, and I knew there was no way I'd get my book back on my own.

"_Pokker også..." _I cursed as I walked up the stairs to the second floor. There was only one person who could help me now.

I knocked on Megamind's door and entered while saying "Megs, I'm sorry to wake you but-"

He was already up, getting dressed. With one foot on the ground and the other half way up in the air, it seemed he was getting dressed in... in...

A skirt? He was freaking stepping into a skirt! No, wait. It seemed to have short sleeves on the sides and AC/DC marked on it. A T-shirt?

I saw his face slowly turn indigo as we stared at each other. There was a long pause…

"OH MY GOD! GIANT ANTS!"

"Hah, you wish!"

Cue pout.

* * *

**Hah, I'm not stupid enough to fall for that one ;)**

**I've never waked up and eaten cookies in the middle of the night, but I HAVE stayed up and eaten them. No cookies are safe when I'm around.**


	8. Chapter 8

"We should all do what, in the long run, gives us joy, even if it is only picking grapes or sorting the laundry."~ E.B White

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Chapter 8- Laundry

Minion rather liked to do chores. It was relaxing, and because it was so easy, they allowed him to think and philosophise while doing them.

Washing, cooking; they were all a part of his instinct as a guardian. And to be honest, he preferred it if Megamind kept away from those things. Roxanne was OK, but _never_ Megamind. The big headed alien could easily make a sandwich, but that was about it.

During the years, there had been a few incidents. Once, the Lair had been filled with foam from the floor to the ceiling. That instantly banned Megamind from washing clothes. Another time, he was trying to heat something in the microwave. The explosion had forced them to invest in a new kitchen.

In other words, Minion was the Lair's declared 'housewife'. And he didn't mind it a bit.

While whistling _Crazy Train, _Minion was sorting the day's laundry. With two extra roomies, there had been an increase in things that needed to be washed. He was just about to throw a pair of jeans into the right mountain of clothing when a low sound caught his attention.

"Um..."

Minion turned around and saw the oldest of the girls standing there with a red blush in her cheeks. Looking everywhere else except on him, Fire mumbled;

"I just wanted to ask..."

"Yes?"

Gently biting on a nail, she gave him a shy look.

"Could you... could you teach me how to wash clothes?"

Minion smiled. Oh well, a few extra hands wouldn't be so bad. As long as they weren't blue.

* * *

**Fine... I don't know how to wash clothes... DON'T LAUGH!**

**Ok, go ahead and laugh, after all, that's why I'm writing ;)**

**Man, there are MANY good laundry quotes out there!**


	9. Chapter 9

"Give me a laundry-list and I'll set it to music."~Gioacchio Rossini

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Chapter 9

**- Underpants**

During his years of washing clothes, Minion had found more or less everything in the laundry. There had been coins, screw drivers, photos and once a mini robot. Of course, he'd also _washed _more or less everything; from oily rags, to a man named Bernard.

But this time, Minion was confused.

Blood?

OK, he'd washed his share of suits drenched with Megamind's purple blood. But staring at the piece of clothing in his hand, he found himself completely out of his element. Why on earth would there be blood on underpants?

It took him a whole ten seconds before it occurred to him, and when it did, his eyes grew wide.

"Um... yeah... that's mine..."

He turned. Behind him, the girls were standing. Fire, who had just spoken, was blushing bright pink and biting her lip. Right behind her, Remmy was examining the ceiling with great interest.

There was an awkward silence before Remmy reached her arm in the air.

"Everyone agrees that Fire and I wash our own clothes once a month?"

There were agreements all round.

* * *

**1992's gonna notice a change of names. It's because for Remmy and me, this makes more scense. **

**I was actually searching for a good quote about menstruation, but would you know- there are very few quotes about the topic! There are more about doing laundry!**

**And now to something completely different: I'm thinking of making a youtube vid answering some questions if you have them. Why? Because I've always wanted to...**


	10. Chapter 10

_AN: __I am sorry if this is confusing for you, but this is a chapter about what happened our first morning in the Lair, before we met Roxanne. To get Remmy's version, read 'Living in 3D'._

"One must always have one's boots on and be ready to go."~Michel de Montaigne

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**Chapter 10- Two Borrowed Boots and a De-gun**

I woke up slowly. First my dreams got interrupted by my awakening, then I heard the sounds of the real world, and then my eyelids started to tremble.

'_Wake up, sleepy head!' _my brain whispered. I yawned and stretched my body under the sheets.

My eyes finally opened.

For a second I was totally confused. This was _not _my bedroom! Where the H was my teddy bear?

Wait...

_Ah crap, that's right!_

I was sleeping on a mattress on the floor inside a tiny storage room that had been cleared out the night before. On the other side of the floor another mattress lay empty, but I knew Remmy had been sleeping there before.

I sat up, not bothering about how exposed I was. Remmy had confirmed yesterday that sleeping in nothing but my underpants were OK. Finding the clothes next to my mattress, I started to get dressed. My bra, a pair of jeans, a T-shirt, a thick hoodie with a zipper in front, my socks...

I stopped and stared at my second pair of socks, thick and made of wool. I also took a look at my winter boots; very big so that I could wear two pair of socks and keep out the Norwegian coldness. Problem was that I was no longer in a village in Norway, but in a city in Michigan, USA.

"_Pokkers, _this is going to be warm."

Walking out of the storage room and out into the Lair, I followed the sound of forks against plates to find the kitchen. I walked up a stair that I remembered seeing in the movie during Roxanne and 'Bernard's escape. On the next floor I found a door leading to a kitchen and its two occupants.

"Morning," I said shyly. From the table, Megamind made a little sound from his throat, apparently his way of saying good morning to his unwelcomed guest.

He was cutting up a huge pack of American pancakes, resembling the Norwegian _sveler_. For a second, I just stared at it. Geez, American's really are weird. Treats for breakfast.

"Good morning, Miss Fire! What can I get you?" the fish smiled.

"Do you have some bread and milk?" I asked, and Minion pointed at a cupboard.

"Up there is bread. Milk and whatever spreading or cold cuts you want is in the fridge."

Spreading and cold cuts. I stored the words for later use. Back home there was just one word for anything you can place on bread; _pålegg. _But when in Rome...

Seating myself at the table, I looked around.

"Where's Remmy?"

"She's not asleep?" Minion asked, sitting down with a box of fish food.

"No. I thought she might be here."

"As long as she's not destroying anything," Megamind mumbled into his cup of coffee. I rolled my eyes.

"She might be weird, but she isn't stupid! I think..." I had a bite of my simple breakfast.

"Oh, really. And may I ask just how well _you _know her?"

"Um..." Good question. Chatting online could hardly be thought of as 'knowing' a person.

"I doubt Miss Remmy is ruining anything, Sir." Megamind only frowned and finished his pancakes. With a shake of his body (apparently there was no point in discussing) Minion poured some of the fish food into his bowl. I stared fascinated and with a tilted head on the sinking food.

"Minion, is that _all _you eat? Because you do have some seriously sharp teeth. You sure you're not a predator?"

The fish blinked. Maybe it had never occurred to him that someone would wonder about it. "I do eat other things as well. But not fish, though. That would be weird."

"You ate my goldfish once," Megamind pointed out, pouting.

"He was bugging me, Sir."

"If you say so." He rose and placed the dishes on the counter. "Well, I have some work to do."

I stared at his feet as he passed me. "You are aware you're only in your socks?"

"Yes, I _am! _I think a Brainbot must have stolen my boots. I'm going out to look for them now."

"Question. Are they _really _made of seal?"

He placed his hands on his hips and stared at me. "What? Don't you believe I was evil enough to wear a seal?"

I showed of my palms. "No, no. Just wondering. I mean, seal is very comfy, though I've never used seal boots without fur on them. It's just the 'baby' thing that's a bit weird."

The aliens shared a surprised look while I finished my food.

"You _wear _seal boots? For real?" The blue man looked like he'd just found the sickest girl in the world.

"What? It's warm. But I don't like the thought of wearing a baby." I shrugged.

The look on Megamind's face told me the truth. There was no way those boots really _were_ made of baby seals. On the inside, I did a fist bump. Ha – knew it! Their eyes still followed me when I placed the dishes on the counter next to Megamind's. When I turned, Megamind shook his head to get his mind on other things.

"OK, so I'm going off to hunt down a thieving Brainbot. Minion, could you help me? You always seem to know just where to look."

"Oh, oh, can I come too? I still haven't met a Brainbot!"

Rolling his eyes, Megamind walked out the door. _"Fine. _But no touching! They bite."

Something in his voice made me wonder if he actually wished for it to happen.

After looking in all the Brainbot's favourite places, we still hadn't found a single 'baby seal' leather boot.

"They're my favourite pair," whined Megamind. "I got them custom made!"

"Where on earth is Remmy?" I wondered to myself. You'd think she'd be up and ready to explore this place.

Passing a leather couch, I saw a head filled with light brown, curly hair. It didn't really sink in before I'd passed it, and I jumped back in real cartoon style and looked over the back of the couch. There, sound asleep, was Remmy, her glasses in a weird angle over her face.

"Remmy?" I said, hoping she'd wake up, but she only murmured something and kept on sleeping.

"You found Miss Remmy?" Minion asked and came back, Megamind right behind him.

"Yeah, she's asleep," I said and shrugged my shoulders. "We better keep looking for-"

"_My boots!" _

Megamind was suddenly at the end of the couch, looking down at Remmy's feet.

I did a face palm. God, this wasn't good.

His cry had finally woken up Remmy. She squinted, trying to see without her glasses.

"Huh?"

"_Why are you wear__ing my boots?"_

While straightening her glasses, Remmy yawned. "My feet got cold. Fire's boots were too big and yours basically fit."

I rolled my eyes, wondering whether or not Remmy had lost her head. "Remmy, you should have asked first." Especially when those boots belongs to an alien who owns a De-gun.

"You were asleep," she whined. "I didn't want to wake up anyone! Thanks for waking me by the way."

"_You. Stole. My. Boots!__"_

Remmy got up from the couch and flexed her body. "Borrowed. Not stole."

"When you don't ask, it's considered stealing! But I shouldn't be surprised, since you're Australian."

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?"

Not caring to answer, Megamind reached for his De-gun.

"I'll just de-hydrate the two of you and rehydrate you when the portal is finished! That way I don't have to worry about you stealing anything else!"

He aimed the gun at Remmy, who instinctively flinched, but there was no need.

"Sir, no!" Minion grabbed his master's cape and held him back, causing Megamind to drop the De-gun on the floor.

"It's the only way, Minion!"

"You can't de-hydrate our guests, Sir," Minion tried to explain.

"Yeah, listen to the fish! At least he's smart!"

"Oh, you little..." In a quick move, Megamind had unlocked his cape and gotten free.

"Woohoo! Take of the rest!" Remmy squealed, not aware of what situation she was in. A gloved hand reached down to the floor to pick up the De-gun...

I snatched it and jumped back away from him, aiming the gun against the big blue head. With a snarl, I placed my index finger over the trigger.

"_Don't you move, blåbær! _I've got a De-gun, and I'm not afraid to use it."

Everyone froze, except Remmy who let out a "Wooo! Cool. Now, force him to strip!"

The shocked expression on Megamind's face was replaced with fury and embarrassment as he moved his eyes from the gun to Remmy.

"_What?__"_

"Come on, Fire! We can finally find out how his junk look like!"

I've only ever used a shot gun. The thing about shot guns is that they have only one setting: deadly bullets. The cool thing with the De-gun is that it has several!

Now, the stupid thing is that in the heat of the moment, it never occurred to me to check which setting it was on. So when Megamind finally made a move to throw himself at the fifteen-year-old girl, I in my adrenalin kick fired the gun at him; but it wasn't on de-hydration.

Minion, who of course had figured that Viking teens plus guns was a bad mix, grabbed his master and pulled him back and behind the robot suit. In the next moment, the gorilla body was covered in what seemed to be garlands, crêpe paper and glitter.

There was a moment of silence.

Then Remmy started to laugh, Minion began to pick on the decorations and I stared at the gun.

"Huh. De-coupage. I thought it was set on De-hydration."

It took me a minute of staring before I understood what I had just done. Damned, I'd just aimed and _fired _a gun on someone! _"Åh... Åh, herregud! _I'm so sorry! _Beklager, beklager, beklager!"_

"You just tried to shoot me!" Megamind said, in complete shock. He stared at me, the De-gun and then at the decorated Minion. "You shot Minion!"

"_Beklager, beklager, beklager…" _I kept on babbling.

"What if it had been set to _De-stroy?"_

"_Beklager, beklager, beklager!" _I dropped the gun on the floor and kicked it away.

"Minion, are you OK?" Megamind asked as he began to remove the garlands.

"Yes, Sir, I'm fine. No harm done."

"Well, it could have been. I say we just de-hydrate these girls and put them away until I've fixed the portal."

"_NO!"_ Remmy and I cried.

"I'll never borrow your boots again!"

"I'll stay far away from the De-gun! And I'm very sorry, Minion."

Still trying to free himself from the decoupage, Minion assured me. "That's OK, Miss Fire."

"No, it isn't! Megamind's right, the gun could have been set to anything!"

"See, even the girl agrees. A few months as blue cubes won't harm them," Megamind said. Minion rolled his eyes and got rid of the very last string of crêpe paper.

"Sir, you are _not_ going to de-hydrate the girls, and no harm was done. Now, Miss Remmy, are you hungry? The rest of us have already eaten."

Remmy, who hadn't stopped laughing the whole time, dried her eyes. "Yes, thank you Minion."

"Great, I'll show you the way to the kitchen!"

The two went and left Megamind and I alone.

For a moment, we stood still, our eyes still fixed on the way Minion and Remmy had gone. Then I received a deathly glare.

"_Never _do that again," he growled, and pointed a finger at me. I watched it for a second before I dared meet his eyes. I'm never the girl who needs to be put in her place, because I'm rarely away from it. Having someone mad at me really wasn't a thing I was used to.

"I doubt I will," I said.

His glare softened a bit and he leaned back to look at me properly while fastening his cape back on.

"Fine. But if you do, you'll spend the rest of your time here as a cube."

"Deal."

With a swoosh of his cape, he turned to follow Minion and Remmy.

"Megamind."

He turned and glared at me. "What?"

Scratching the floor with my foot, I mumbled, "I _am _sorry."

For a moment he only watched me. Then, with a sigh-

"It's all right."

I nodded. "Good. Thank you."

Because, you know, when you're staying in the Lair, you should try to get along with the hero and his fish.

Not shoot them.

* * *

**Sry for doing some changes, ninetheen! Just made more sense to me this way.**

**Yes, I've worn seal. What? It's common! **

**And really, pancakes for breakfast? C'mon.**

**Shortly after this, Roxanne came and Remmy scared her by asking how Megs' junk look like... **


	11. Chapter 11

The best thing in every noble dream is the dreamer... ~Moncure Conway

**

* * *

**

Fitting In Wasn't Really an Option

I was antisocial. Couldn't help it. I liked my own company. But of course, if I had the choice, I would have been popular, cool and social. I'd be one of _those _girls. Come on; don't pretend that you don't envy them a bit. OK, so they have a serious lack of brain cells, but at least they fit in!

How many times had a place felt like home? Well, on courses I'd always managed to find a bunch of friends. People who resemble me.

But other than that? No. Guess not. School? Hah! That place is the worst of them all. Yeah, I was lonely. When I was awake.

When I closed my eyes, I truly felt at home. Surrounded by magic, hope and fluffy candy floss. I could dream myself anywhere and feel like I'd finally reached my destination in life. If I could I'd stay there in my dreams, I'd never wake up.

"Fire? Could you come and help me hold this part while Sir welds it in place?"

I opened up my eyes and stared up in the ceiling, awakening from my daydream. "Coming."

But when I held tightly around the metallic piece, looking away from the white light of the welding to spare my eyes, I had to admit. I liked it here. It felt like home.

But then again-

Maybe this too was no more than just a dream?

* * *

**Sry for letting all my emotions out on you, it's a bad habit of mine. I don't talk to my parents but more or less to everyone else O.o **

**Dreaming is how I deal with life. To be honest, I've got a pretty boring life. It's still waiting to get started. But at least I have my dreams. **

**Because if I couldn't dream the world would be pretty gray and sad.**

**And so would I...**


	12. Chapter 12

**Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia. ~E.L. Doctorow**

**

* * *

**

Updates

For the fifth time that day (my third day as 3D), I checked the updates on . And just like the last four times, there were none.

The watch on my computer was still set on 03.45. The whole world that was the Internet was still frozen. And I was even more certain that time stood still back home.

Which meant I didn't have any new Fanfictions to read. Oh well, at least I could still write! Though it was just way too weird to write fluff about Megamind and Roxanne when I now knew them personally. It was like intruding into their private life! Even though, I felt my fingers itch to touch the keyboard to get down the new fluffy ideas I had for them. God dammit!

I went into my favourite stories to reread some of them, avoiding those that hadn't been finished yet; knowing that I would have to wait _months_ to get the endings was driving me mad!

While surfing the page, an idea pop into my head, beginning as only a tiny spark but then turning into flames in my mind. My mouth grew into a grin.

"Remmy!" I called, hoping she could hear me. Expecting to have to wait for an answer, I didn't believe she would suddenly pop up from behind the couch, almost giving me a heart attack!

"What's up, Buttercup? Hey, that rhymed."

"Geez, Remmy, you scared me! How the hell do you do that?" I stretched to look over the back side of the couch, just to check for any secret entrances – or any words that marked "secret entrance".

"I'm using my talents as a silent walker to stalk Minion," Remmy said with a smirk.

"You're going to freak him out, Remmy. I doubt that poor fish is used to crazy fangirls like you. But that wasn't why I called."

Curiously bending over the couch, Remmy looked at my computer screen.

"Anything new?"

"Nope, but that doesn't mean _we _can't provide the readers with some new stories!"

For a second we looked at each other, the mischief in our eyes growing.

"Fire, I like the way you're thinking. Let's do some updates!"

* * *

**Oh, you didn't think this was ALL make belief, DID YOU? *Spin around***

**Muhaha- please, feel free to get green of envy :D**


	13. Chapter 13

Without music life would be a mistake. ~Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

**

* * *

****Tir N'a Noir**

Remmy and I were lounging on the couch, just relaxing. I didn't know what Remmy was thinking about (and I wasn't sure if I _wanted_ to know), but during my own philosophising, a strange thought struck me.

"_Hei, _Remmy?"

"Mhm?"

"Now that we have fallen into a family movie," I started, and sat up so that I could look at her. "Do you think we can sing now?"

Remmy blinked. "Dunno. Maybe. Why don't you try?"

"Why don't you?"

"Fire, I don't sing unless my life depends on it. Go ahead."

I rolled my eyes, but stood up and cleared my throat. It wasn't that I was an awful singer; I just wasn't any good at it.

"_Det e svart __November, havet knuse mot stand. Ein forliste draum fra eit somargrønt land. __Men eg huske enno vakre Mary McKear, longt vest i Tir n'a Noir. Va du daum? Va du te? Va du hud? Va du blo? Eg kan hørra deg le. Eg kan huska eg lo. Bakom horisontar, så forvitra og glir, e du mi, mi Mary McKear."_

I looked back at Remmy, who was making a grimace.

"You know what, Fire?" she said, "I don't think we can sing here either."

* * *

**Fine, I wrote a fanfic containing neither characters... But it was still fun to write it :D I promise next chap WILL have a 'Megamind' character in it!**

**And I'm sorry- I doubt you will be able to use Google translator to find out what I was singing. It is written in a Noregian dialect. But here is (my) translation:**

_**It is black November, the ocean is crushing against the shore. A marooned dream from a summer green land. But I still remember the beautiful Mary McKear, far away in the west in Tir N'a Noir. Were you a dream? Were you real? Were you skin? Were you blood? I can hear you laugh. I can remember I laughed. Behind horizons, so weathered and 'glir', are you mine, my Mary McKear.**_


	14. Chapter 14

**You can teach a student a lesson for a day; but if you can teach him to learn by creating curiosity, he will continue the learning process as long as he lives. ~Clay P. Bedford**

* * *

**Useless and Useful**

Incredible. The girls were actually capable of being annoying when they didn't do anything! Megamind peeked over the robot he and Minion were constructing to look at the girls on the couch. Remmy had borrowed Fire's computer. Apparently it was capable of connecting them to their own world. Fire was looking utterly bored, trying to concentrate on her math.

What was annoying was how her eyes every fifth second slipped away from her books and started to glance at their work. Why on earth couldn't she at least look away? It was distracting to have someone staring at him while he worked!

After fifteen minutes of staring, Megamind couldn't help himself.

"What?"

His voice awakened Fire. She blinked and shook her head, trying to come back to reality.

"Huh?"

"Anything I can help you with?" he asked with a spike in the voice and a hand on his hip.

Remmy immediately looked up from whatever she was doing and was just about to say something, but he interrupted her. He had the feeling that whatever she asked would be out of the question anyway. "No!"

"I didn't even ask-"

"No matter what, the answer is still 'no'!"

Pouting, Remmy turned back to the computer. Fire giggled, and Megamind got back to her. "You keep staring at us!"

The giggling stopped and she blushed slightly. "I do?"

"Yes!"

Minion turned off his blowtorch to follow the conversation. "Sir is right, Miss Fire. You don't seem very interested in your homework."

Shrugging her shoulders, she closed her book. "Guess I'm just bored. Don't mind me."

"It's annoying and distracting!" Megamind growled. Not that the alien himself was good at coping with boredom, but it was really irritating when others were complaining about it.

"Then give me something to do! Something useful," she whined, and threw her hands up as she asked for him to hit her with any work he possible could think of.

Rolling his eyes, he bent over the robot again to keep up with his work.

"Useful? You are use_less_. You can't do laundry, you can't do chemistry, you can't weld..."

"I know how to weld."

Both Megamind and Minion looked up to stare at each other, as if they wondered if it was the other one who had said it. But when neither seemed to react, they moved their eyes to the girl on the couch.

"What did you just say?" Megamind asked.

"I know how to weld."

Everyone looked at her with new interest. "You do?" It wasn't that he was a sexist, but he had to admit that he had some slight problems picturing a girl with welding mask and leather apron.

A shy smile tugged her lips. "Yeah. I go to a school of agriculture. Welding is a part of the package. I also know how to use a chainsaw, forge, and turn around a lamb that's still inside its mother."

Minion tilted his 'head'. "How do you-"

"You don't want to know!" Fire said.

Scratching his goatee, Megamind looked her up and down, as if she would be wearing a sign somewhere saying 'Can Come in Handy'.

"What kind?"

"Manuel and half automatic."

"Are you any good?"

She shrugged. "No, but I'm not bad either. I have a problems getting started and often weld the pin or tread to the metal, but when I've first got started I'm OK. My mechanics teacher thought I had potential."

A tiny smile played in the corner of his lips. "OK then. The machine is over there."

Fire blinked for a few seconds. "What?"

"Show me what you can do," he challenged.

With nervousness painted all over her, she got up. "Protection equipment?"

"Next to it. Apron, gloves and mask."

She took a deep breath, nodded to herself and went to get set.

Megamind listened to the sound of her welding. Yes, problems in the beginning, but when she got started the sound was even and confident. Potential, she'd said.

Maybe the girls actually _were _useful, after all?

* * *

**You learn a lot of things on agriculture schools. For instance how to turn around lambs that is still inside it's mother. But I totaly sucked at driving tractors...**


	15. Chapter 15

"Beautiful bodies come in all shapes and sizes, they have lumps, and they have bumps. We get scars along the way, it doesn't change how beautiful we are, and Mother Nature didn't make a mistake. We are perfect just the way we are." ~Cheryl Ann Webster

* * *

**Laugh Your Lungs Out**

Unlike humans, Wayne had a great sense of hearing. It wasn't like he – back in the days as a hero – could hear Roxanne's call for help across the city, but good enough that when entering the Lair that morning he could hear two new voices.

Now, that was just a bit weird. The Lair didn't take in visitors! Megamind wasn't the type to call people up and invite them for tea. Minion… OK, that was possible, but not Megamind.

From the main room, he was sure he heard humming.

"_Det er til månen vi må forholde oss. Den er som sne når den glitrer i vannet. Og mye skjer mellom fire vegger. Vi tenker det er visst derfor vi er. Og solen skulle stått opp og varmet min kropp, men den er allerede gått ned, gått ned i havet et sted…"_

O…K…?

From another place, he heard something he at least could understand, even though he could clearly make out the Aussie accent.

"You know you should just tell me, Roxanne. It's not like I'll tell anyone... except for Fire, but still!"

"No, Remmy, I won't tell you."

"Come on. Just a hint? Tentacles, blue, retractable..."

"Remmy!"

Wayne started to walk again, heading for the main room. This was weird. Who on earth were these people?

On the floor of the Lair, a 10 foot robot lay on the floor, getting its finishing touches. On the one side, he caught a glimpse of a blue head and a glass bowl. That wasn't so weird… what was strange was the person on the other side of the robot.

She was wearing old clothes from the 80's that no one would care about if they got oily and dirty. Some of her hair was in a pony tail, but since the hair was graduated, most of it had escaped the band and gave her a boyish hairstyle. The girl was still humming while adding grease to parts of the robot.

"_Hvordan føles det å være levende? Jo takk du, så lenge jeg har tv. Hvordan føles det å bare sveve med? Jo takk du, så lenge jeg flyr. __Og hvordan føles det å være levende?"_

There were girls in the lair. Normal teenage girls. Not aliens, but human. What the...?

Grinning, he made his present known. "Have you started your own YWCA, little buddy?"

Everyone looked up from their work, surprised by his sudden appearance.

"YWCA?" Megamind asked, not catching his drift. Wayne just waived his hand.

"Not important. I was just wondering why you've started to take in youths."

The girl blushed slightly and got up from her position on the floor, stretching her legs to get the blood stream going again.

"Believe me, it wasn't planned," the blue inventor mumbled, and turned back to his work.

"It just happened," Minion explained. "Do you have the cape with you?"

Megamind looked up again. "Cape?"

"Minion promised he'd repair a cape for me," Wayne said, and held up a bag. "So, what's the story?"

"_Oh my god, _it's Metro Man!"

The other voice he'd heard earlier and its owner had managed to sneak up on him, and that took a whole deal of silent walker skills. He turned and looked down at a younger girl, her hair curly and light brown. She was taking him in under her glasses, the eyes trying to see his muscles under the golden shirt.

"Yeah, that's me," Wayne said and smiled a blending smile.

The girl squealed. "Oh, this is so cool! Fire, look!"

He quickly spun around to see wherever she was looking, ready to help. "Fire? Where?"

Still blushing, the first girl waived her fingers at him. "Um, that's me. I'm Fire." The Australian went up to stand beside her friend, and Wayne had the chance to look at them both properly. Fire scratched her cheek, making a few dirty lines of grease on it.

"So, does anyone want to tell me what's going on here?" he asked.

"Long story short, these girls can't get home just yet, so they're staying here for a few months," Minion explained as he took the bag from the hero and looked down at the cape inside. "Oh, this won't take long. Just a minor scratch."

"And why can't they get home?"

"They come from a different dimension and the portal that led them here blew up," Megamind mumbled from behind the robot.

"Portal? Dimension?"

"Never mind."

His eyes again fell on the girls who were looking at him with great interest. They seemed rather normal, but then again, so did he and _he_ was an alien.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Roxanne entering the room. "Hi there, Wayne."

"Hi there yourself, Roxy," he said, his mind still working hard on the facts he'd just been told.

She walked around the robot and over to her boyfriend. "How are things going here? I hope they haven't intimidated him yet." Placing a soft kiss on top of his head, she made him smile sweet.

"No, not yet," Megamind said.

A spark of a memory went over the eyes of the youngest, triggered by what the couple had just shared, and she reached up to whisper something in her friend's ear.

"_Tentacle Man."_

They began giggling and the oldest sat down to continue her work. Wayne frowned. "Tentacle Man?"

"And here we go," Megamind sighed and got up so that he could see everyone better over the robot. But in the corner of his lips, a tiny smile played.

The girls suddenly stopped their giggling and stared at Wayne.

"I forgot about the hearing," the Australian whispered to herself. The other began to whistle nervously and kept on the greasing.

"I didn't get it," Wayne said and looked at the others, in hope that they could explain the joke to him.

"Fire and I have just been discussing what might be hidden under the tights," the girl grinned, her curiosity reflected as in her eyes.

It was as if all sounds in the room had fallen silent as everyone turned to him. He felt warmth rise in his cheeks.

"Um... I... Err..."

"Remmy!" Roxanne said; her voice was like one you would use to tell off a child.

"No! No! Let them continue." Megamind smirked and leaned against the robot. "This might actually be interesting."

Wayne frowned at him. Of course he hoped for something to use against him later. They might have become friends, but they still bantered every now and then, almost like college boys trying to intimidate the other.

"I don't feel very comfortable right now..."

"Fire had an idea about white tentacles with stars on. Remember, Fire? And I tried to draw them!"

Fire's eyes grew large out of embarrassment, and she coughed as everyone stared at her. Then Megamind suddenly started to laugh. He bent over and held his stomach as the laughter took control over him. Not the evil, fake laugh he'd used as a villain, but one filled with true hysterical emotion. Soon he disappeared behind the robot again, and kept on his laughter cramps on the floor there.

Wayne blushed some more and scratched the back of his neck.

"Yeah, this is somewhat weird. So, about that cape..." he said, trying to lead the conversation somewhere else while Megamind still laughed.

"I can have it ready for you in fifteen minutes. Just sit down somewhere, and I'll get to work." Minion disappeared with the bag.

After a few minutes the laughter stopped and its owner got back up on his feet, having to lean against the robot for support.

"Oh my god, that was priceless. Sorry, but the picture, it was just too..." Megamind chuckled and wiped some tears. "Girls, you deserve cookies."

"_Yay!" _the girls cheered.

"Wayne, coffee? Or do you need something stronger after this," Roxanne asked and gave her friend an apologetic look.

"Coffee's fine, Roxy," he said, but as she passed he added; "But make it strong."

She winked and walked to the Lair's kitchen, her still giggling boyfriend following her.

Wayne suddenly realized he'd been left alone with the two girls, and he wondered if it was done on purpose or not. The youngest, the one Roxanne had called Remmy, looked up and down his body with interest while the other found a rag and began to clean her hands.

"Sooo... Different dimension, huh?" he asked, but he knew he was screwed.

Remmy walked up to him and scratched her chin. "Sooo... Tentacles, huh?"

"Remmy," Fire said with a warning tone and removed the band in her hair. "Remember what I said. You have to butter them up."

It was the longest sentence he'd heard her say, so it was the first time he noticed the accent. "European?"

"She's Norwegian. Back to the topic about your... genitalia."

"I think I need that strong coffee now." Was Roxanne perhaps taking her time on purpose?

Both girls walked up to either side of him and gave him sweet smiles.

"We won't tell," Remmy promised.

"And believe me; whatever you can tell us, we've already been thinking it. Nothing will surprise us," Fire added.

Wayne looked from one girl to the other. It wasn't that he was very embarrassed over... it... but it wasn't necessary a common think to talk about. Then again, they _were_ teenagers. Even though it had been years since he'd been one, he still remembered the curiosity and the hormones.

"Why do I have the feeling that if I don't tell you, this question will keep coming up?" he asked, but smiled. The girl's determination amused him a bit.

"Because it will," Fire replied. "Remmy is still trying to lure facts about Megamind out from Roxanne." The way she said it was calming, telling him that they were, after all, trustworthy.

"OK, fine. I'll tell you," he sighed.

The teens blinked and looked at each other. "Y-you will? Seriously?" Remmy asked, not believing what she'd just heard.

"Yes. Because I'd rather not have you girls asking me every time I come over. If I tell you, I can just sit back and laugh whenever you attempt to find out about Megamind's junk."

The girls grinned at each other.

"_Råkult!"_

"Awesome!"

"On one condition. You don't tell anything to the big headed guy. He'd just use it against me."

"_Deal!" _both girls said.

'_OK,' _he thought, _'Here goes nothing.'_

"Normal," Wayne said. Without realizing it he lowered his voice a bit, "But two tentacles."

"_Ooo!" _The girls looked as if they had just tripped over a bag of free candy. Fire's eyes did a quick jump down and up again.

"Really?"

He nodded, and realized he wasn't embarrassed about telling them. Actually, this was a bit funny, to see their reaction and to admit that he wasn't fully human.

"They grow, so I can actually hold the woman close. Can even move them."

"Wow, that's cool!" Remmy said; her voice a bit husky as she still tried to take in the facts.

"So, how do the women react?" Fire asked; it seemed she couldn't stop grinning.

"Of course there haven't been so many. But those I _have_ had took it quite well. There was one who freaked out, a sweetheart during my school days, but that was just because I didn't warn her. The others actually found it... interesting!"

The girls shared a grin of joy, their eyes darting down then back up to his eyes.

"Metro Man," Remmy said, "you rock!"

"Takes some courage to come forward like that," Fire agreed. "_You_ deserve a cookie."

He couldn't help but smile himself. Having someone think you were cool for standing up for what you are felt really good.

"And we all agree that I now have the rights to just sit back and follow your attempt to find out more about Megamind while laughing?"

"A deal is a deal," Remmy said and nodded. "Laugh your lungs out!"

* * *

**Well, we neded SOME answers in this story! I don't expect Remmy to use the same ideas as me i 'Living in 3D', but I'm sure she'll write something about genetalia soon. So stay put for more episodes about this topic!**


	16. Chapter 16

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."~Joe E. Lewis

* * *

**Fill Up ****My Empty Mug**

"We'll be going now," Megamind stated as he finished buttoning his shirt, heading for the invisible car with Roxanne following right behind him. "So you better behave while I'm gone."

I rolled my eyes and sunk further down on the couch. "We're not _children, _you know? OK, so Remmy's still a kid, but-"

"Hey!"

"-I'm eighteen and technically an adult." Not that I wanted to be one, of course. Throughout my year of being seventeen, I'd gone to sleep every night hoping for Peter Pan to come and take me to Neverland. Damn, I never planned on growing up! Let's just say that birthday I'd been in a very confused mood, not sure whether or not I was happy.

"Even adults can misbehave," Roxanne spoke, her voice reminding me a bit of my mom trying to explain something.

"Just don't touch anything! And Minion... Good luck."

The fish gave his master thumbs up. "I'm sure we'll manage, Sir. You two have a nice evening."

The lovers waved goodbye to us and drove off. In my author mind I wondered how the date would go. Usually I'd be writing it down, but now? It felt too weird to write those kind of stories, at least as long as I lived here. But I was sure, when I got home I'd type like I'd never typed before!

"So, what should we do?" Remmy asked, and settled on the couch we'd permanently placed in the monitor area. After being introduced to the aliens' huge movie collection, Remmy and I had decided it was easier this way. Neither of us wanted to move it whenever we wanted to watch a movie.

"We could watch _'Help, I'm a fish'_?After all, it's Scandinavian so it's right up my alley, you haven't seen it before, and I bet you…" I turned to Minion, "…like movies about fish." There had been a serious amount of underwater movies in the collection. _'Finding Nemo"_,_ 'Shark Tale'_; you name it, Minion had it. "I can go and fetch us some snacks."

"Chips are in the cupboard under the sink," he explained and went to fetch the movie. "And could you bring me a bottle of fish food?"

"Sure thing. You can heat up my seat until I get back, Remmy."

She lounged over the leather couch and grinned. "Ah, I like that task."

I smiled and rolled my eyes before I made my way towards the kitchen. Man, they owned a lot of candy! I wondered if it was an American – or a Megamind – thing. I picked up a bag of paprika chips and started to search the kitchen for something to drink, since I had the memory of a guppy and had already forgot where they stored it.

Plates, mugs, fish food, vodka...

I stopped and took a back. A bottle of vodka was standing innocently in the back of a cupboard, waiting beside the shot glasses, its clear liquid untouched and ready. A look in the fridge told me that we did have orange juice.

"Perfect!" I whispered, grinning.

"HAH!" I cried and slipped off the couch and down on the floor again, where I continued with a series of giggling.

Remmy gave me a push with her foot. "Are you drunk, Fire?"

"_Ja visst, faen!"_

She leaned back to enjoy the sight of me dunk and red in the face from the laughing. The fifteen year old had chosen to stay just a bit tipsy, so that she could have fun watching us. And boy, did she have a good time.

"I like you drunk, Fire. You look like a total weirdo! Doesn't she, Minion?"

He only answered with a chuckle. The fish hadn't had more to drink than Remmy, but with that tiny body, it had been enough. Somewhat responsible as she was, she'd turned off his suit.

"_Remmy!"_ I said, but it came out like a cry. _"Du må drikke mer!"_

For some reason, talking Norwegian had suddenly become even funnier after the first half hour. It amused me that they couldn't understand what I was saying. And that lead to me laughing even more. 70% of the evening had been spent on the floor with my back against the couch.

"Whaaat?" Minion asked, and once again joined me in the constant giggling.

"She has... has... to _drink_ more!" I cried again. The alcohol was fogging my mind, making it difficult to find the words I was looking for.

"No, this is funnier." Remmy laid her hands behind her head and grinned. "And by the way, you have problems talking. Maybe you should just stick to your own language."

"_Da blir det norsk, da!"_

"Loading up!" Minion said out of the blue.

"What was that, Minion?" Remmy asked, having a lot of fun watching our behaviour.

"_Lades opp!" _I agreed, and mixed myself another glass of vodka and orange juice, not caring about half of the juice ending on the table. Oh, god, this was funny! Even funnier than the last time (and only time) I'd been drunk. Usually I had to stay only a little tipsy to take care of my friends, but tonight, that was Remmy's part, and I could just let myself go for once.

"_Minion har seriøst freaky tenner!"_

"I'll pretend that meant Minion is cute, and overlook the 'freaky' part," Remmy decided.

"_Hva enn du vil, snuppa."_

"I'm cute?" Minion asked, and grinned his toothy grin.

"Yeah, you're cute. We've told you that." Petting his furry arm, she just smiled. His happy smile sent me into another fit of laugher, which I tried to stop by slapping myself in the face; a strange habit the alcohol caused.

"You shouldn't... shouldn't _do _that, Miss Fire!" snorted the fish. "You'll just end up _hurting _yourself!"

"_Nei da, nei da. Jeg er helt fin jeg!"_ I mumbled. No one would have understood what I said, even if I'd spoken English.

The sound of a car entering the Lair made us turn – or in my case, crawl back up onto the couch to see over it.

"Sir!"

"Megs!"

"_Blåbær!"_

Both Megamind and Roxanne got out of the invisible car and stared at us. "Have you been drinking?" she asked, not sure if she believed it.

"I've only had a little bit, but these two have had _enough!" _Remmy explained as they walked over.

Megamind looked at the now empty carton of juice and the bottle of vodka. "I can see that."

"I hope you don't mind that we took it. Minion said it was a gift from the mayor that was never used."

"And he allowed you to drink?" Roxanne frowned.

"You know how it is. At first it's a little and then..."

"But you're underaged!"

From the floor, where I had once again fallen, I waived a hand. "Not in Norway, I'm not! Hah, take _that _America!"

Megamind seemed rather amused over the whole scene. "At least you haven't ruined anything."

"Are you thinking of joining us, Sir?" the fish asked as he began to roll around in his bowl. He made a little "Wooo!" and the hero chuckled.

"I don't think so."

"_Eg heiter Ola Tveiten og eg er ein arbeidsmann__. Eg eig ein traktor og meg sjølv og gjer så godt eg kan…" _I started to sing, waiving my empty glass to the tune.

Even Roxanne had problems trying not to smile. "I think you're right, Remmy. They've had enough." Leaning down, Megamind held his watch against me.

"I've made a dictionary in here. This seems like a good time to try it out."

"_Og bjørnen ligg i sitt vinterhi…" _I continued in Norwegian, but as he pressed some buttons, I heard the sound of my recorded voice coming from his watch, singing in English.

"_Because the whole winter I've been clearing out a road. And the road became nice and wide and even- suddelida, suddelidei. The nicest one I've seen- suddelida, suddelidei. No it wasn't a __trail by cows! And if it doesn't lie there forever I'll eat my cap- suddelida, suddelidei. Trallallalalala Fill up my empty mug!" _I stared at the watch when I finished. "Ooo..."

"Yeah, no one's going to fill up your mug any more tonight," Megamind stated and looked at his watch in affection, clearly proud over his latest invention. "I'm a hero now, so I can't have underaged drinking in my Lair now that I'm home."

"I'll clean up," Remmy assured. "But I think I'll just dump these two here on the couch, if it's OK."

"I'll help you clean!" Minion whined, ready to help. But as much as he tried, the robot body wouldn't move by his command.

"No, I'll take care of it."

"No-no_, I'll_ help," I mumbled and got up on my feet, to find that they were way too wobbly. Remmy only had to give me a tiny push with her finger to cause me to fall back on the couch. "Or I'll stay here..."

Roxanne shook her head. "Maybe that's for the best. We're going to bed," she said, and grabbed her boyfriend by the arm before leading him in the right direction.

Oh, the couch was actually pretty comfortable right now! I lay down and rested my head against the armrest, already feeling the sleep take over my body.

"You sure you don't need help?" Minion asked, still very drunk, so it was just barely understandable.

"I'll be fine," Remmy assured the fish and patted the top of his sphere. "You two get some rest now! And I'll see you in the morning."

Before I fell asleep, I heard her add: "That's going to be funny as well... for me!"

Why was a woodpecker attacking my brain? I slowly opened my eyes and found myself looking at black leather.

And why was I sleeping on the couch?

...Oh, that's right. And that would explain why I felt queasy.

"Mm..." I stretched my body and felt the feet touch the furry body of my companion in drinking. The move made my tummy disagree slightly and my head ache more _"Åh, hodet mitt," _I whispered and rubbed my temples.

"Good morning!"

The voice sent a needle though my already soar head and I groaned. Peering up again, I saw the big blue head and a smirk.

"_Ti still, Megamind."_

"I'm sorry, I don't seem to understand. Are you asking me to talk louder?" he said while raising his voice.

Damned be vodka with orange juice.

"_Putt en sokk i!"_

"Would you mind saying that again? I'm still testing out the translator." A gloved hand with a watch was no more than ten centimetres from my face. I growled.

"_Megamind, ti still ellers kverker jeg deg!"  
_

From the watch, the translation came out with my own voice, but without my familiar accent. _"Megamind, shut up or I'll kill you!"_

It seemed the part about killing awakened the guardian. "Huh, what?" he asked, but then his face twisted in a grimace and he sank back down to the bottom of the bowl. "Ouch..."

"Feeling a bit bad today are you, Minion?" Megamind asked while smirking. The fish didn't answer; he just groaned and shut his eyes. "So, are you two planning on doing this on a weekly occasion, or should I talk even louder?"

Tipping his finger against the sphere, he caused the water inside to move, and the sound to spread through the water.

"Sir, please..." Minion whined.

"I'll take that as a no, then! But maybe I should stand by, just in case."

Suddenly I noticed a head with curly brown hair passing by.

"_Remmy! Remmy, plis hjelp! __Få vekk blåbæret!"_

The translation came shortly after: "Remmy! Remmy, please help! Get the blueberry away!"

She heard the plead and came over. "Not feeling too good, are you?"

"Nooo..." I said, looking up at her with huge sad eyes, trying to make her feel sorry for me. "And he's making it worse."

Remmy crossed her arms and gave Megamind a strict look, but she was still smiling. For some reason, I had the impression that she was enjoying herself. "Megamind?"

"I'm just giving them a lesson!"

Rolling her eyes, she caught him by the collar and dragged him away. "I'll get you some water," she said as she removed the annoying and protesting 'blueberry'.

"Thank you," I whispered after her, even though I knew she didn't hear it.

With another groan I made myself comfortable again. Yeah, I had a hangover, but at least a whole lot of my behaviour last night had been only my own weird self, so I wasn't puking all over the place.

Looking up, I met the autumn brown and tired eyes of Minion. I started to giggle again.

"What?" he asked, blinking tiredly.

"You're funny when you're drunk," I explained, remembering the acrobat in the sphere. But I quickly stopped laughing; it had sent another nail of pain through my head.

The fish did a very weak chuckle. "So are you, Miss Fire. But I don't think we should be 'filling up our empty mugs' too often."

I nodded and closed my eyes. "Yeah, I think you're right."

* * *

**Yes, this is me when I'm drunk... I laugh a lot and slaps myself in the face. But about 60% of it is just me letting myself go. **

**Ever since I read 'Thruth or Dare' (LOVED IT :D) I've wanted to get drunk with Minion. **

**And I can tell you right now, Remmy had a nice day. Of course she didn't care much about _me, _but Minion got a lot of love. Poor fish... At least there was someone to pamper him.**

**Just to say it, I'm not allowed to buy vodka and other really strong stuff, but yes, I AM allowed to drink my liver out! Though I prefer cider.**


	17. Chapter 17

"I don't like my nipples showing. They look like targets."~Sienna Guillory

* * *

**Blue or Pink?**

Megamind frowned and glared at Remmy over his mug of coffee. She was sitting on the other side of the breakfast table, staring at him with foggy eyes as if she was thinking of something.

"What?" he barked, forcing her out of her thoughts.

She blinked, but didn't stop looking at him. "I was just wondering..."

_'Oh, great!'_

"What are you wondering about _now_?" Sipping his cup, he feared the worst.

"Do you have nipples?"

If it wasn't for the fact that he had expected a personal question, he would have choked on the bitter drink. Instead he closed his eyes and sighed. _'Why me?' _"Remmy, do you think you'll ever stop asking questions like that?"

"Nope. Do you have nipples? Because that suit is _very _tight, and there's no sign of 'em."

Glaring at her, he replied, "Yes, I have nipples. Happy now?"

"They got to be pretty weak," Remmy kept on pondering, not considering the topic as closed. "So, blue or pink?"

"What?"

"The colour. Blue or pink?"

Megamind groaned into his coffee. _"Let's de-hydrate them, _I said. _Let's de-hydrate them and get it over with. _But _nooo!_ Minion _insisted_ they were guests!"

"_Skjer'a?" _Fire entered the kitchen and poured herself a glass of milk (she'd avoided the orange juice the past couple of days).

"Megs has nipples," Remmy stated, still staring at the alien. Said alien rolled his eyes.

"Really? Blue or pink?"

Megamind sighed and returned to his coffee. For some reason, he had the feeling this would be a _very_ long day.

* * *

**I don't know if he has 'em or not. I like to think he has :D But I need more proof. From that one proof I've seen, he _might_ have some weak blue ones.**

**Damn, you can find quotes on EVERYTHING! Even nipples!**


	18. Chapter 18

**You're not drunk before the asphalt knocks you down~ Phrase often used on 'Russecards' among Norwegian seniors**

* * *

**Fishy**

As nature called, Remmy left me and Minion drunk on the couch. I crawled around to look over the back of it and watched as she left.

"She should be drunker..." I mumbled. It came out like a ball of words, glued together by vodka and orange juice. Minion chuckled, causing him to lose balance and roll all the way around a few times.

I grinned and turned back to sit the right way, but ended up on the floor again. How on earth did I _do _that? Was the couch slippery, or something? I stared at it for a moment, thinking about the option, but not really managing to focus on it properly. Apparently I didn't look too sane, because the fish fell into another round of laughter.

"What?" I asked, and moved my eyes to him, trying to focus. "Ooo... my eyes are _totally_ messed up."

"Hey, Miss Fire, could you pour a shot into my bowl?"

I tilted my head and tried to decide whether or not it was a good idea. "Remmy... Remmy turned off your suit for a... a..." Crap, what was the English word for _'grunn'_ again?... "Reason! That's it! Remmy turned off your suit for a reason!"

Actually managing to pout, Minion looked way too cute. Oh, the huge round eyes and the begging and... "Aw, man. Here."

I filled a shot glass with vodka and crawled back up onto the couch, standing on my knees over his sphere. The world was moving around me and I felt slightly dizzy.

"How... How do I open this... this... this _thing?"_

"Button's on the back," he answered and did another acrobatic move around the bowl, making me laugh.

Once the sphere was open I poured the alcohol down in it, watching as some of it mixed with the water before Minion had the time to drink it all. I looked around inside it, seeing how the world was slightly blue outside the glass because of the light.

"'S cosy down here?" I asked. I'd always liked small rooms; for some reason they made me feel safe. Maybe it was a reaction to living between mountains all my life?

"Yeah, very cosy!" he said, and swam around the bowl some more.

I put a finger in the water, feeling just how hot it was down there, before I took it back up and stared at the water dripping from my finger.

"Got to be a lot of vodka down there now, huh?" I mused.

"Enough for the whole night!" the fish cheered.

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to take bad decisions when your brain lacks oxygen? I chewed my lip, trying very hard to make my thoughts fit together. Once again I must have looked pretty weird, because Minion laughed.

Deciding that I wasn't doing any harm, I dipped the shot glass into the water of the sphere. Staring at the water, I asked, "You're not... um..." Goddamn, what was the word again? "Poisonous! You're not poisonous, are you?"

"Noooo!" he whined, playing offended. It didn't work, because his face cracked up and he started to giggle.

Shrugging my shoulders, I raised the glass to my lips. _"Skål!"_

Remmy came back just in time to see my grimace of disgust. "Eeeew!" I cried and backed off, and I ended up falling off the couch once more.

"Fire, are you _drinking _Minion's water?"

The fish fell into his worst fit of laughter that evening as I managed to at least get myself back up in a sitting position.

"Remmy, don't drink it!" I warned, even though she clearly wasn't considering it. "It tastes _fishy!"_

* * *

**It did! Do NOT drink it! Eeew! Minion just kept on laughing that whole night. The next day we had to change the water, it was still filled with vodka. Ever tried sleeping in alcohol? Just got one thing to say: Poor fish!**

**And if you wonder what 'russ' is, you can find it in wikipedia. It's seniors celebrating that they are finishing school. I'm a russ this year, and I can't wait! Three weeks of partying, getting drunk and doing crazy stuff!**

**Like drinking Minion's water...**


	19. Chapter 19

"Evil is only good perverted."~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

* * *

**Busted**

All right, time to study until masses of my brain spills out my ears!

Or...

Just a short break!

I put down my thick history book and surfed the internet. First off there was LiveJournal; I'd just joined, so there was a lot of uncovered fanart there. And I could still go into and take a look at my old favourites at Fanfiction . net . Not to mention edit my profile page with some more quotes.

Finished with my 'recess' I had a look at my profile. I liked to look at my own stories, pictures and profiles online, just to see what others saw. But of course, the profile hadn't changed yet. It would still have taken a couple of minutes back home, and here, it wouldn't change at all. I sighed and stared blankly at the screen for a moment. It would have been nice to have some new stories to read.

Oh well, time to get back to work.

I reached for my book and felt nothing but the table. Confused, I turned.

"You again?" I asked the Brainbot that I recognized immediately. It was holding my history book and looking at me. Last time it stole that book, I was forced to search the whole day in order to find it.

"Hand it over, punk," I growled, in a way I'd tell off a misbehaving dog. It bowged, was still for a second and then flew away with my book. _"Hei! Kom tilbake! Det der er _min_ bok!"_ I cried as I ran after it.

And that was how I left my computer at the coffee table, open and unattended.

* * *

"I've got to get up soon," the alien whispered.

"_Noooo!_" his girlfriend whined, and tightened her arms around him, making him laugh.

"Roxanne, I can't stay the whole day."

"Why not?" Roxanne lifted her head and looked into his eyes. She could almost see the spark which informed her that ideas had enlightened in his brain. Well, they _had_ been silent for a whole hour filled with cuddling. Nothing made him relax as much as a session under the sheets. The smile on her lips couldn't be stopped; she wasn't at all hurt because he wanted to get up. This was who he was. This was the man she loved so much, and who loved her back just as much.

Placing a hand on his jaw, she gave him a peck on the goatee.

"Go ahead. I'll follow soon."

He grinned, happy that she understood him. As a thank you, he glued his lips to hers for a minute, tasting her – and himself – on her lips. The aftertaste of sweet, hot, satisfied love.

If it hadn't been for the ideas bugging his mind, he would have stayed for another round. Usually he could fight them, keep them down, but they weren't willing today. Sadly.

With a frustrated noise he backed away and climbed out of bed. Roxanne hoisted herself up onto her elbows and watched him get dressed. To think, this guy was _hers! _And over the past few months she'd taken advantage of that.

Megamind found his cape under the bed (their clothes often ended up in the weirdest places) and turned one last time to smile at his girlfriend. God, she looked good naked under his sheets, her head tilted as she watched him. The ideas in his head gave him a kick, forcing him out of his gazing.

With one last groan he left the room, promising himself that he'd make up for it a thousand times more later on.

Stretching his long, thin body, Megamind entered the main room. After a night's patrol, it had been nice to sleep in. Especially when he would sleep in next to a certain sleepover visitor with the most beautiful curves and sapphire eyes.

Roxanne was so understanding; knowing she had to let him do something about his ideas before the sparks exploded and turned his brain into unusable mush. The only thing that was allowed to do that on a daily basis were her kisses!

He was simply walking by when he noticed the open computer on the table.

Well, that was weird. Fire never left it open without logging out first. She'd never even loaned it to him when he'd asked to watch the movie with his name again. Instead she had insisted to sit and watch it with him, claiming that she'd use the opportunity to ask him some questions.

"_The bones in his 'skeleton' were attached! Didn't that give you a clue?"_

"_He's as alien as me. I didn't know whether or not we shared the same limb structure!"_

"_When Minion pretended to be you, his eyes changed. Why didn't the eye colour__ stay the same?"_

"_I have perfected mine and Minion's holograph. It t__ook a whole lot of work and quite a bit of my amazing intellect, but in the end I managed it."_

"_Show off."_

"_Just telling you the facts."_

Scratching his chin, Megamind looked around. No Fire. Not even a flame.

It would be fun to see what the people in that other 'world' wrote about him online. With a grin he sat down in front of the computer. Just a quick surf and then straight to the inventions, and _then_ he'd get back to Roxanne ASAP.

"Let's see what you all think of the handsome master of all vi- I mean hero...ing..."

_Huh, 'BFire92's' profile on 'Fanfiction dot net'_. Hadn't Remmy said the girls met online? She'd also said they were fans. Maybe this was where they met?

Fanfiction? Fan-Fiction? Fans writing fiction?

About him?

Oh, he just couldn't stop grinning! Maybe he was even _popular?_

He hadn't planned to look any closer on Fire's profile, but a line caught his eyes just as he was about to move to the main page.

'_Author had written 25 stories for Megamind.'_

Fire had written stories about him? She hadn't mentioned that. To be honest, Megamind wasn't sure whether to be embarrassed, grateful or a bit annoyed. Scrolling down the page, he came across some quotes he remembered too well.

'_The bad guy __doesn't get the girl!"__ Minion - Megamind._

"_I have eyes that can see right through lead..." Metro Man__ - Megamind._

O...K...

And then _'My stories (25)'._

Another glance over his shoulder told Megamind that the girl wasn't around.

Letting fate pick the story, he simply clicked and there it was.

'_There's Always a First.'_

Well, this _was_ his first time reading a story about himself!

The first thing that came to his enormous mind was that he wasn't quite in character. But then again, it wasn't like she'd watched him while writing. The next thing was that Fire had been wrong, because she'd written that it was his first time drinking. That wasn't right. Even in the movie there had been a scene of him drinking champagne. Bad research.

And then he basically stopped thinking...

His jaw dropped down.

His shining green eyes widened.

His body froze, except for a gloved finger which scrolled down the page.

_What the h...?_

Tired footsteps hailed him somewhat back to reality.

"Oh, Megs, you won't believe how happy I am to see you! The Brainbot took my history book again and..."

Silence.

"Megs... What are you doing?"

Still frozen, he didn't answer. His whole body was tensed and uncertain of how to react to what he'd just read.

"You... you're not... Not my... my fanfiction?" Her voice trembled in worry.

Megamind's eyes darted over to her. Standing there wide eyed of horror, Fire looked like someone had dropped an anvil on her. He could see the realisation sink in, and it was followed by a hand slapped over her mouth.

"_Åh svarte faen."_

Moving quicker than he had ever done before, he pulled out his gun, aimed and fired at the guilty teenager.

* * *

It wasn't uncomfortable to be dehydrated. It was almost like a deep sleep. No dreams, of course, since my brain didn't work properly, but it did feel like no time had passed.

But the moment I was rehydrated, it all came back.

I knew I was screwed.

I knew I was busted.

And I knew that I should be happy to I wake up on the kitchen table instead of in the Sahara after a once-in-a-blue-moon rainstorm.

They were staring at me. All four of them. Each of them watching me like I was a murderer in a court.

Roxanne didn't seem like she knew what to think. The woman was just looking straight at me with confused eyes.

Another pair of eyes, light brown and round, were simply shocked. Poor fish. At least I hadn't written anything about him!

Megamind had his arms crossed and his face had that frozen look I'd found him with, mixed with a fury I knew I should fear. _'Please not Sahara, please don't dehydrate me and place me in Sahara!'_

Remmy of course, knew everything. The Australian had been supporting all the way, commenting on my stories, helping me loosen up and spread my hormones. She looked more scared, and I wondered if she had told them anything about her participation and encouragement, not to mention messages. Probably not, otherwise I was sure she'd be here on the table next to me. Better not tell them; if I was going down, I wasn't dragging her with me. There was a moment of awkward silence, before I figured I should say something.

"So... Am I dead now?" I grinned nervously. God damn, why did that grin always appear at the wrong times?

Megamind frowned, answering my question. I was dead...

"You didn't plan to tell us, did you?" Roxanne asked, and I wasn't sure I should be relieved that she didn't sound furious.

"_Nooo_..." It came out like a scared squeal.

"Of course she didn't!" Megamind couldn't keep it in any longer. "Of course she never planned to show us just how perverted she is! She's been interfering with our... personal business!" His face turned further purple and I could practically _see_ the lightning bolts coming out of his eyes.

"It's not like I'm the only one!" I tried. "I've read _far_ more explicit stories!" There really were a lot of naughty stories out there. To be honest, before I fell through, I'd been searching for some more inspiration. I'd been afraid my stories would end up repeating themselves, and therefore I had been thinking about something more... dirty.

"You've _read _stories about... about _us _as well! What kind of sick teen are you?" The shocked alien took a step back.

"Hey! I'm not _sick! _I'm _hormonal!" _

"You must be sick to write _that!"_

"I don't only write smutt! I've written action, fluff-"

A tiny part of my brain knew he was somewhat right. I had really written a whole lot of naughty stories about him and Roxanne.

"Is there any part of our life you haven't intruded?" Megamind growled and I leaned further back on the table to increase the distance between me and the green eyed man with the gun at his hip.

"Um..." Oh crap.

"That should be illegal! You could have at least asked!"

Rolling my eyes, I explained, "Yeah, and how would I have done that, if I might ask? You're a movie character! I never expected to meet you!"

"And I never expected to have sick teens in my lair!" he spat back at me.

"As I said: I'm. Not. _Sick!"_

"You could have fooled me, perverted girl."

I hissed and felt the adrenaline attack my body. "I'm not perverted!"

"You're perverted and gross!"

"And you're a blown up egocentric alien!"

"Filthy author!"

"_Jævla romvesen!"_

"Despicable human!"

"_Helvetes blåbær!"_

"Obnoxious!"

"_Dustehue!"_

"I want to read those stories."

Both of us froze, our faces only twenty centimetres away from each other. Slowly everyone in the room turned towards Roxanne.

"_What?" _Megamind and I asked, not sure if we'd heard her say it.

"I'd like to read your stories, Fire. I have to admit, I'm a bit curious."

"You... You are?" I quickly shared a look with Remmy, the only other person in the Lair (heck, in this whole 3D world) who had read them. She shrugged, leaving me alone with the decision.

Thinking, I chewed my lip. Well... It wasn't like I had any _huge _surprises in there. Well, maybe I should hurry up and delete the story where I'd killed them, but other than that…?

"OK."

"_What? _Roxanne!" Megamind seemed totally confused, staring at his girlfriend. "Why on earth would you want to... to read... _that?"_

Roxanne gave him a calm smile and placed her arms around his neck. "I just want to know what the fuss is about, Megs. You know me; I'm a nosy reporter."

Man, she was good! His green eyes melted and I could see him struggle to fight her sweet smile and soft voice. In the end he sighed. "Fine. OK. But don't except me to read them as well!"

She grinned and gave him a peck on his large forehead. "Thanks Megs." Turning to me, she said, "Let me see them."

I sat on the floor with my back against the wall and a book in my lap. The past few hours there had been a silence in the Lair. Everyone was waiting for Roxanne to finish my stories, and considering how many there were, that would take a while.

The fish and his master were trying to put together the pieces of the broken portal, Remmy was doing some doodles on a piece of paper and I was reading my text books. Neither of us were really focusing on our tasks.

Nervously playing with the strap of my bra, I chewed my lip. She was taking so long! Even though she was a fast reader, I really wished Roxanne would finish soon! She hadn't even made a sound indicating her reaction. Hurry u-

"It's not that bad."

Everyone looked up from whatever they were doing.

"Huh?" I asked.

"It's not that bad. I mean, it could be better, of course, and it's not very colourful. But you are young and English isn't your first language, so considering the circumstances, it's not bad."

"Actually the good grammar is thanks to my beta reader Twoie, but…really?" My cheeks were getting hot and I fumbled even more with the strap.

Roxanne nodded and sent me a reassuring smile. "No, it's not. And I would like you to pick out one for Megamind to read."

"What?" The alien himself stood up and stared at her like she'd gone crazy.

"Fire is right, there's a whole lot of... _other_ stories here as well. You were unlucky to find one of those... um... M-rated stories as your first."

"But... but..."

Rolling her eyes, she got up from the couch to stand in front of him with her arms crossed. "I don't want you to believe she's _all _perverted. No offence." she added to me.

"None taken."

Megamind looked from her to me then back again, trying hard to come up with an argument for not reading my stories. I could almost see the wheels in his head turning. But in the end he had no choice.

"OK then," he said with a sigh. "I'll read one. But only one!"

He sat down on the couch with his arms crossed, showing that this was not something he was looking forward to. I looked at Roxanne, just to check if she still meant it was a good idea. Nodding, she gave me the cue to do it. I picked up the computer and searched through my stories; looking for one I hoped he wouldn't de-hydrate me after reading. In the end I decided for one I had been very pleased with when I wrote it.

My heartbeat was racing as I handed him my computer with '_Stars and Old Movies'_ on the screen. Green eyes gave me a quick warning before turning to the words. If this story wasn't OK, then it was the Sahara desert for me. Stepping back I began fumbling with my hair. Man, who'd think I'd be here right now. I certainly wouldn't have believed it. _Was this the most embarrassing thing that had ever happened to me? Yes, definitely!_

There was about five minutes of complete silence, a lot of time to feel the nervousness rise. In the end he shut down the screen and flexed his fingers against each other.

"Um... well... It wasn't..."

"Am I dead _now?" _I asked and bit my lip.

Megamind glanced over at Roxanne. There was something there in the corner of his eyes. Maybe the story had gotten to him somehow. God, I hoped it had!

He sighed. "No, you're not dead."

"I'm... I'm not?"

"No."

"_Sooo…_"

"It's OK. We don't have to talk about it again," he said, before meeting my eyes and pointing a correcting finger at me. "As long as you keep some of your... fantasies to yourself!"

Happy not to be a de-hydrated cube, I took the offer. "Deal!"

But in the pocket of my hoodie, I crossed my fingers and added in my mind _'At least for as long as I'm 3D.' _I couldn't promise anything further. I doubted that I'd be able to keep my fingers off the keyboard when I got home.

"In that case," Minion began, "I'll go start on dinner. Do you girls want to help?"

Grateful for a reason to leave with Megamind and Roxanne behind, I followed Remmy and Minion towards the kitchen.

This wasn't so bad! We didn't have to talk about it again and I hadn't woken up in a desert! Who'd think I'd get off this easily? Though if he had seen those pictures I had faved on DeviantArt, I was sure I was...

"_Fire!"_

_..._

_Helvete._

* * *

**Funeral is on Saturday. Make a portal and show up... There will be no dinner afterwards (I'm not paying for that perv).**

**Megamind- Incredibly handsome and master of all vi... I mean- heroness!**

**Me: Megs, get the F off my computer**

**Megs: Just having some fun with your readers. No big deal.**

**Me: Uh- YEAH it's a deal! You shouldn't be snooking around on my computer! We agreed; I don't write more smutt about you, and you keep of my stuff.**

**Megs *pouting*: _Minion _agreed. I was just forced to sign that contract.**

**Me: Well, you signed. Now, hand over the computer!**

**Megs: Ah, OK. But remember, one more... naughty... word and you're a cube!**

**Me: Yeah, yeah, now hand it over.**

***Watches the blue alien leave***

**Me *whispering*: Hah, now I can write smutt again! _Megamind shall not use Fire's computer without permission and Fire shall not write M-rated stories no more. _And now he used it ;) Muhahahahahaaaa!**


	20. Chapter 20

"Fall seven times and stand up eight."~ Japanese Proverb

* * *

**Standing U****p**

Remmy did a few dancing steps on the sidewalk.

"I must admit," I said, "I'm kind of disappointed that you didn't dance in the cinema tonight. Ever since you told me you did it when you saw 'Megamind' I've wished I was there to witness it."

"We can see the movie on your laptop when we get back at the Lair, and I can dance then!"

I grabbed her arm with my own, entangled them just like I used to do with my friends back home. It always felt nice to walk arm in arm with a friend. Maybe because I didn't have too many of them, so I wanted to keep those I had close?

"Maybe you could challenge Megamind to a dance-off? I heard he did that in one of the comic books."

"Talking about blue bigheaded aliens, I had kind of hoped that he'd be at the corner waiting for us by now."

I peered through the darkness of the night towards the corner we were walking towards. Our 'roommates' had promised to pick us of after the movie. "They'll probably be here soon."

"Do you think we'll ever find out what his junk look like?"

Blushing, I looked around to see if there was anyone around to hear what she said. Luckily, the only other person around was still pretty far away. Being weird in private was one thing; I was shyer out in the open. "I bet you'll pull down his pants if we don't."

"You bet I will. I want to know, and don't pretend you aren't as curious as me. It's been two weeks, so it's about time we found out!"

I petted her head and giggled. "We will, Skittles. Don't worry."

"As long as you don't forget the mission, _Guppy! _We shall find out!"

"Ooo..." I tilted my head. "A mission? Find out what's in Megamind's pants is our mission?"

"Yes."

"Interesting."

At least it wasn't a 'mission impossible'. I was certain that if no one told us, Remmy _would _pull down is pants sooner or later.

My thoughts were interrupted; it seemed we'd met up with the other person in the street. Either he was used to people moving out of his way when he came, or he was just plain impolite, because he'd managed to bump Remmy's shoulder when passing us, causing us both to lose our balance.

"Hey!" she cried.

The man turned and looked down at her. "What?"

Remmy laid her head back in order to look up in his face. "Um..."

"You own us an apology," I said, and remembered to add "Sir." Back home it wasn't common to address others in such a polite way, so the word felt strange in my mouth.

"N't think so," he mumbled, sounding rather stupid for leaving out the 'Do'. The smell of his breath made my nose wrinkle. Whoa – someone had too much to drink.

"I'm sorry, but I think you do." I used my most polite voice, overlooking that flag in the back of my head telling me that I should let this go and walk away.

"OK," he growled, but instead of just giving us an apology and walk off, the tall strong man simply picked up Remmy by her jacked and held her up over his head. "Sorry, girly. There, are you happy now?"

The girl's eyes widened, and she looked down and whimpered. Remmy's body curled together in the air, hanging well over two metres off the ground.

"Remmy! Let her down!" I cried and tried to jump up to grab his arm, but his free hand was laid on my head, keeping me on a distance. The guy smirked down at me.

"N't think so," he said, and I could see he found this whole thing amusing. What a jerk! Of all the people to meet in a dark street, it had to be a drunk, strong, tall guy who got a kick of other's despair.

I always tried to stand up for my friends. It was one of my better qualities. OK, so I'd done some _very _stupid things to them as well, but who hasn't? But still, if any bullies tried to mess with me or my friends, I had a bad habit of snapping. To be honest, my teacher had even sat down and talked to me about it. I was the class' nice and mature girl with the flaw of having too much adrenaline.

Once I ended up in a fight with the school's strongest boy after he'd said something about my best friend. I snapped and attacked him.

And I lost.

But I still attacked, and I _wanted _to hurt him. I wanted to cause him as much pain as possible, because I knew words stung. I'd heard others before say things about my body. And I knew that I didn't want any of my friends to feel the same as I did. I would try to protect them, even if it meant I'd get hurt.

It had been three years since the last time I was in a fight. I had grown older, and learned to shut my ears. But this night, I couldn't do that. This night I felt like my old self again; angry and protective. This man was just like them; the bullies of my past, and the bullies of the past I knew Remmy had too.

I snarled at the man holding her. _"Let her down!"_

He started to laugh. "Why would I do that?"

Meeting Remmy's scared eyes, I knew I had to do whatever it took to get her down. The girl was scared of heights, _for faen!_

"Because if you don't I'll do everything in my power to cause you _pain_."

I felt the adrenaline in my body. My muscles were shaking and my face was twisted in a growl. In my ears I could hear the sound of my own heartbeat. At the moment it sounded like a hummingbird, beating so fast it was difficult to separate one beat from the other. I knew I was about to snap. It had been three years since the last time. Three whole years of building up pressure. Violence should always be avoided, but snapping is a great way of getting rid of emotions. Now I couldn't hold it in much longer.

The man laughed again. "And what are you going to do, chubby? Huh?"

Oh no he didn't? He didn't just pick on my _body? _

"_This!"_ I growled as my knee met his groin.

If only the guy had been shorter, it might have worked just like in the movies. But he was tall, and even though I had used as much force in my leg as I possibly could (which wasn't much), the advantage of height caused the kick to be much weaker than I hoped it would be.

Still, it clearly hurt. He bent forward with a protecting hand over his 'jewels', swearing. As his eyes rose to meet mine, I knew I'd done something stupid. There were no teachers here to break it up, no 15 year old _sober _boy with a limit to his strength. This was bad.

The back of his hand slapped my face, but there were such force in it that I was thrown to the side and into the brick wall. Already I felt a thin line of blood run down from my split lip and my cheek was burning. Tears ran down my face and I suddenly felt weak and unable of protecting myself and my friend.

But speaking of my friend, Remmy had suddenly gotten back 'down to earth'. I heard the man cry out in pain again and blinked away a few tears to see what was going on. The teen had clasped her hands around his arm with her nails out. They were piercing through the thin upper skin and pressing against the nerves in the thicker part of it. He shook his arm and managed to get her to let go, and she fell hard on the asphalt. I could hear the sound of her glasses breaking when the man stepped on them.

"Goddamn whores!" he growled and leaned over her.

The adrenaline had control again, and I quickly got back to my feet and threw myself at him. I wasn't strong, but at least my teeth were healthy. I dug them into his shoulder and the pointy corner teeth made him jerk in pain.

But just as he raised his hand to pull me off, a blue light surrounded him, and the next minute I was on my knees on the ground with a blue cube in my mouth. I spat it out and it step danced on the sidewalk. For a second I stared at the cube, before slowly raising my eyes. Black boots, blue lines on a dark spandex, a belt with spikes, lightning bolt, and a snarl.

"_What the hell do you think you're doing?"_

I winced at the sound of his voice. _Someone_ was mad at me. That was a rare.

"I... I..."

"Are you _stupid?"_

I blinked and got to my feet. "No... I..." Then my brows entangled and the leftovers of adrenaline made me growl. I stared him down. _"I'm __not__ stupid. _I was standing up for my friend." Tearing my eyes off his I walked over to Remmy, who was sitting on the ground with one of Minion's huge metallic hands on her back. "Remmy, are you OK?" I asked, afraid she might have gotten hurt.

"Yeah, I just hit my back pretty bad, but nothing big," she mumbled, and Minion helped her up on her feet. "Ah, my glasses!" Remmy picked up the broken pieces and tried to focus on them

"I'm sure we can fix them, Miss Remmy. But I think Sir should have a look at your back. And-" his eyes flicked over my face. "-he should probably have a look at you too, Miss Fire."

"When we get home, Minion. But for now…" Megamind glared and pointed at the weird sight of an opening to the inside of a car in mid air. _"Get in the car!"_

* * *

"That was stupid of you," Megamind mumbled as he examined the dark bruise on my cheek and my split lip.

"I wish I'd managed to make that _jævelen _sterile," I said, and twitched when his thin, blue finger met the wound on my lip.

"I'm so sorry, Fire. It was my fault. You shouldn't have had to stand up for me like that." Looking up, I saw Remmy standing with her arms around herself. For once, I could see the parts of her that was made of glass, usually hidden behind her joyful appearance. We had more in common than I'd first thought. The past had marked us both. I couldn't help the weak smile.

"Remmy, I'll _always _try to kick balls if that means standing up for you."

We shared a smile.

"Well, I'm going to give you two dehydration guns!" Megamind announced and touched the back of my head. "Do you remember everything that happened?"

"Megs, I admit I have a bad memory, but-"

"I'm checking if you have a concussion."

"Oh. Um, yes."

"Headache? Queasy and dizzy?"

"Nope."

"Name?"

"Yeah, like I'd give you that."

He leaned forward so that he could glare at me past my shoulder. "Name?" he asked again.

"BFire92," I replied, refusing to give out my real name.

With a snort he backed away from me and walked over to Remmy instead, trailing her back with his hands.

"Does it hurt?" he asked, and I heard he was much nicer to her. After all, if he and Minion had seen the whole scene from the invisible car, they knew I'd been the one starting it.

"No," she said, and he took a few steps back.

"Move your upper body and tell me if you feel pain anywhere." Remmy did as told, but was clearly fine. "Good. I'll fix your glasses first thing tomorrow. Now, Minion, could you walk Remmy to her room?" Crossing his arms, he sent his friend an important look.

"Sir, are you sure-"

"Just do it, Minion."

The fish looked from me to his master. But in the end, he knew it was better to leave us to it.

Megamind waited until they were gone before giving me his death glare.

"I'll ask again; _what the hell were you doing?"_

I leaned back in the chair and refused to meet the glare. "What was right."

"Getting your butt kicked and putting your friend in danger was _right? _What's wrong with you?"

I actually snarled as I got out of the chair. "What was I supposed to do? Look on as Remmy was two metres off the ground? Back off and pretend I didn't care?" I cried, and I felt the wound on my lip open again, sending a sharp pain though it.

"You should have acted your age and not resolved to violence!" he yelled, the hands at his side were hard fists trembling of fury.

"I tried to protect her!"

"She wasn't in danger!"

"She's afraid of heights!"

"It wasn't like she was dying!"

"You of all people should know what it's like to feel _small _and _helpless! _It wasn't a dodgeball, but I know it still hurt!" I snarled back. "Listen, _blåbær, _I will always stand up for my friends. No matter what. And that means you as well!"

The silence that followed after the yelling was strange and thick, before he ripped it apart with a lightning struck, "What?"

I looked away and began to play with my hair. "Well, you've taken us in and you've taken care of us. Heck, you even showed up tonight and de-hydrated that guy before he could do any real damage."

Slowly I met the wide eyes again, seeing how unsecure I'd just made him. _"Vi er venner."_

'_We're friends.'_

I knew he'd understood it, because he started to cough and nervously scratch his leather boot against the floor. Another moment of silence walked by before it sunk it.

Waiving his hand against the direction on the storage room with my mattress, he said, "Get to bed." The blue cheeks had gotten a slight brush of indigo, and I knew that even though no apology had been said from either of us, we were square.

"Straight up," I agreed and headed for my room, leaving a blue alien with a rush of emotions behind.

As I got undressed and crawled under the sheets of my bed, Remmy whispered, "How did it go?"

"We've sorted things out."

"I heard you yelling."

"Sorry about that. I believe I scared him a bit when I got my butt kicked."

"That's a good sign," she decided. "If he didn't care, then he wouldn't have gotten mad."

"Exactly. You know what, Skittles? I think the stay here is going to be more pleasant from now on. But for as long as we're here, please remember," I said, and tried to look her in the eyes through the darkness, "just let me know, and I'll _try _to kick balls for you if you're in danger, OK?"

"If we're getting de-hydration guns I doubt I'll need your ball-kicking-skills," she giggled.

I grinned. "You never know."

* * *

**20 chapters! It took Megamind 20 chapter to like me! **

**Sry if it sounds like I'm glorifying myself here, but I'm not. This is a _serious _problem of mine. There was a period where parent-teatcher-meetings weren't too funny. Got a really gorgeous bruise from that fight I mentioned. Me merely pushed me into the wall four times. **

**In other words, mess with my friends and I'll _try _to kick your balls out of your ears... And get myself beaten up.**

**As usual, thanks to 1992 for being my beta ^^**

**And I dunno if I've mentioned it, but on my Deviantart I've made quite a few drawings to this story. Take a look- just search 'BFire92 Falling Through'.  
**


	21. Chapter 21

"The sari's radiance, vigor and variety, produced by a single straight length of cloth, should give us in the West pause and make us think twice about the zipper, the dart and the shoulder pad." ~Naveen Patnaik

* * *

**Sari**

"Question," I began, and sent the genius a glance from the corner of my eye. He was currently in his chair, working on an object.

"Mm?"

"Why do you have a sari?"

Megamind stopped moving for a second before slowly turning his chair around to face me. "Huh?"

"The sari," I continued, and gestured towards the dress in front of me, which was red and orange. "What's the deal?"

Nervously he looked around, avoiding my eyes. "Um... It was a part of an evil plan once upon a time. A very boring story, it ended as usual. Defeat and prison. Very boring indeed."

Tilting my head, I smirked at him. "Are you saying that because it _is _a boring story, or because it's an _embarrassing _story."

"Um... Oh, look at this! I've made you a translator! You just place it on your ear and when you push this button, whatever you say in Norwegian will be translated into English, just like the one in my watch."

"Oooh! Shiny!"

* * *

**Crap, I fell for it...**

**Anywaaay- I've made a drawing of the translator in my note book. I'll try to remember to submit it to my DevArt. It's really neat and Megamind-ish. No spikes, though. Almost like a handsfree.**

**When I first truly noticed the sari in his Lair, I was all like 'Whuuut? The dude owns a DRESS?'. Probably a Minion-creation.  
**


	22. Chapter 22

**Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either.  
**

* * *

**Knock-Out ****Spray**

"Minion? Minion, are you awake?"

The soft voice gradually woke him up from his power down. Still half asleep, he raised his castle and peered out through the glass of his sphere. There Remmy was in her baggy T-shirt and night shorts, watching him as he tiredly yawned.

"Something wrong, Miss Remmy?" he mumbled. It took some time for his muscles to fully wake up.

"Do you have the knock-out spray?"

"Um... yes. Here."

Remmy took the spray with a tired grin. "Thanks, Minion."

"If I may ask-" He tilted his body in curiosity, "What do you need it for?"

Rolling her eyes, Remmy explained. "You didn't think it through when you chose the storage room for me and Fire. We can't sleep."

"Is the temperature wrong again?" Minion asked. That had been a problem the first few days. Coming from completely different climate, the girls had problems sleeping in the same room. Fire liked the temperature to be well down in 15 degrees, or even lower, while Remmy was used to the warmer Australia. But as soon as Minion had arranged a thicker duvet for Remmy and a thinner one for Fire, the problem had been solved.

"No, it's not that. But the _love birds,_"she explained, and rolled her eyes again, "are a bit noisy. They're keeping us awake."

Feeling his cheeks getting warmer, he made a nervous chuckle. "Aha. Well... Just shake it and then give yourself a spray," the fish explained, pointing at the knock-out spray. "It should work for about an hour, and by then I'm sure-"

"He has cum?"

Minion backed in his sphere. "I was thinking more like you would have fallen asleep by yourselves!"

"Oh. Well then. I'll just go and give Fire and myself a shower of knock-out spray. Good night, Minion." The girl then walked off to the deeper parts of the Lair.

For a moment Minion just stared at the place from where she'd disappeared, before getting back into his castle. He would have to find a new storage room for the teens tomorrow. In the meantime… now he wished he'd asked Remmy to give him a spray, too. To be honest, he wasn't sure if he'd sleep well after this talk...

* * *

**You try to sleep under Megs bedroom! Every heard your parents in the night? We all have. And now we had to listen to Roxanne and Megs too... Thank god Minion got us a new storage room! And it's bigger than the last one, which was more like a cot.**

**Poor Minion. Remmy is really freaking him out. **


	23. Chapter 23

"I think, if my butt's not too big for them to be photographing it, then it shouldn't be too big for me."~ Christy Turlington (model)

* * *

**Baby Got Back**

"A little higher! No, no, a bit down. Some more. Tiny bit up again aaand... there! Perfect!"

Roxanne had to hold a hand over her mouth to suppress the giggle. She was slowly and silently approaching her boyfriend, who was currently having the Brainbots hang up some new papers in the Lair. And it _had _to be just right.

He was so concentrated on his work that he jumped when she slid her arms around him from behind. "Hello there," Roxanne purred in his ear, and when he turned in her arms to face her, a great big grin was glued to his face.

"Ollo."

The skinny arms locked themselves around her waist and their noses touched.

"Mm, so... what are you doing today?" she asked, the flirting in her voice obvious.

Even though, he still didn't get it, so said, "There's the portal to work on, a few more ideas to hang up, and I've been working on a... That wasn't what you meant, was it?"

Roxanne couldn't help but roll her eyes. "No, no it wasn't. So, what are you doing today?"

Finally understanding the question the right way, he leaned in, whispering with a husky voice, "I don't have any plans at all."

But before the gap between them could close, one of the uninvited guests walked by. Fire's eyes were closed and she was bopping her head to a tune and singing even worse than normal, thanks to the fact that she couldn't hear her own voice.

"_When a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung, wanna pull out your tough…"_

For a moment they just stared at her as she passed them and disappeared somewhere. Megamind was still blinking and looking after her as Roxanne turned back to him. With a devilish glow, she let go of his neck just to take a hold on his arms and lead them lower on her back. He caught his breath and she leaned forward to finally close the gap. "So… You get sprung?"

The kiss told her the answer.

* * *

**Yeah, I sing to myself. I sing when I'm happy, I sing in the shower, I sing when I'm scared and I sing when walking past the two lovers. It gives them some extra spice, I believe. And now that Remmy and I have moved to a new storage room (yes, we are still considered stuff that needs to be storaged) those two can have all the naughty sex they want! No more need for the knock-out-spray in order to sleep!**


	24. Chapter 24

"Exercise is done against one's wishes and maintained only because the alternative is worse"~ George Sheehan

* * *

**Smoothies and Climbing Walls**

"Tell me again why I'm here?" Fire muttered as she followed Roxanne through the hall of the Metro City Gym.

"Because it's a good thing to stay in shape," explained Roxanne, making the girl pout.

"Round is a shape."

"Not a good one."

"Wrong. The circle is the most wonderful shape of them all! But if it's so important to stay in shape, why aren't my 'roomies' here with us?"

"First: because Minion is a fish. He doesn't need exercise."

Fire scratched her hair. "Yeah, point there."

"Two: Megamind is already skinny; I doubt this would help his physique!"

"Mm, good point. And as hyperactive as he is, he's probably getting all exercise he needs. Lucky bastard. What about Remmy?"

Roxanne avoided her eyes. "I couldn't find her."

"What?"

"As soon as I said there'd be boys here, she ran off and... hid."

Giving herself a face palm, Fire whined, "Why didn't _I _think of that?"

"But why did she hide? She seems so overly interested in..." Roxanne struggled to find the right word, but Fire beat her to it.

"_Gene-tails?"_

"It's genitals, Fire. You're almost as bad as Megamind! And yes."

"_Genitails_... _Geneeetals_... Does that sound right? _Gene-tals_?"

Looking around to see if anyone had overheard the strange conversation, Roxanne ended it with "Close enough. But can't you see anything good about this place?" She gestured towards the rows of equipment and citizen working their ass off.

"Well, I guess there's a few sweet guys here," Fire shrugged, and waived teasingly to someone behind the woman. She turned to see who the teen had flirted with, but it wasn't a jock with six-pack. It was a skinny tooth picker guy with an afro to be proud of, who was blushing badly because of the unusual attention.

Roxanne chuckled and turned back to Fire. "OK, so let's make a deal. I bet a smootie that after today, you'll want to come back."

"I don't usually do bets, but for once, OK," agreed Fire and grabbed Roxanne's hand, giving it a firm shake.

"Great," Roxanne said. "Then I'll-"

"Roxanne!"

She turned and faced Jocelyn, the weather girl from the news station. "Jocelyn, hey! So, what's your plan for today?"

"Oh, I'm going to take my new boyfriend down for a round in the ring. Can you imagine, people think I'm a sweet little bimbo because of my hair and my job!" she said, and caught her beautiful hair in a band to tie it up. Roxanne nodded to herself. People tended to flirt with her colleague without knowing just how tough she was.

"As long as you don't scare him away! Remember the last one; the guy whose nose you broke?"

"Ah yes, that Danish guy, Niel. No worries, this dude actually knows me. I think this might lead somewhere!"

"OK then. Well, you two have a nice day and- Um..." Roxanne looked around. "Jocelyn, you didn't happen to know where that girl I came here with went off to?"

"The brunette with the hands-free in her ear? I think she went in there," Jocelyn answered, pointing towards an open door.

"Thanks! I'll see you tomorrow."

The women said their goodbyes and Roxanne walked through the door to look for the lost teen. The room's walls were decorated with colourful stones and people climbing up them. Immediately noticing the girl half way up one of the easier, straight walls, Roxanne walked over.

"I see you found something you like!" she called up with a grin.

"Roxanne! Why didn't you say they had climbing here?"

"You're into that?"

"Hell yeah! I'm Norwegian, aren't I? I'm a mountain girl."

Fire kept on her climbing and Roxanne turned to the instructor holding the safety rope. "Is she doing any good?"

"Well," he began, and shrugged, "apparently she hasn't done it very often, but she does have rather strong legs. Though she'll need to work her arms up a bit before we begin with the tilted walls."

Roxanne smirked and watched the teen climb to the ceiling. She'd just won herself a smoothie.

* * *

**Climbing is funny ^^ MUCH more funny than jogging!**


	25. Chapter 25

"A lot of my peer group think I'm an eccentric bisexual, like I may even have an ammonia-filled tentacle somewhere on my body. That's okay."~ Robert Downey Jr

* * *

**A Bunch of Retractable, Glowing T****entacles!**

Roxanne groaned. OK, now things were getting ridiculous.

Over the past couple of days, the teens had gotten a tad more irritating. Or as Fire had called it; _'innpåsliten'. _Her translator had translated it to 'clingy' and 'persistent'. That was very fitting. It had actually gone so far that Roxanne had sent Megamind a text asking whether they should meet at her place instead. Today they had decided to take the risk.

Much to Roxanne's later regrets.

"C'mon! We're not going to tell anyone!" Remmy whined, her eyes begging for an answer. Fire was right behind her, not really asking, but not bothering to stop her friend either, hoping for Roxanne to spill it. The two had followed her around the whole morning!

_Where the hell__ was the knock-out-spray?_ Roxanne opened a random box, hoping that it would magically be in it.

"Just a _hint! _Just a word! And then we'll stay off your back... for the rest of the day, and _then_ we'll get back to it. Come _ooon_!"

The forget-me-stick? There was no way she'd hit the girls, but at least she could try to hit herself! Where was it, where was it…?

"Does he have tentacles? Are they glowing. _Anything!"_

OK, this had gone far enough! Roxanne spun round on her heels and waived her arms. "Fine! He has tentacles, OK? A bunch of retractable, glowing tentacles! _Are you happy now?"_

The girls stood all still for a moment, taking in what she'd just said, probably still in shock that Roxanne had actually spilled it.

Then Fire groaned and gave herself a face palm. _"Pokker!"_

"Hah! Retractable!" Remmy gave Fire her open hand, a smug smirk on her lips. "You owe me a bag of skittles!"

With a sour pout, Fire dug into the pockets of her hoodie and found the candy, handing it to Remmy. _"Søren også. _Here, _enjoy _it!"

Then they turned and walked away, Remmy skipping along and Fire muttering something in Norwegian. Was that it? Was that _all? _Roxanne had half way expected some fireworks, a band – heck, a choir of angels! And all that happened was an exchange of Skittles? Well, this was disappointing!

She walked off and entered the main room, her eyes falling on the blue, bigheaded guy in his chair working on some calculations. With a sigh she walked over and looked down at him. She would have to tell him now, before the girls did.

"Megs..."

He looked up, confused over the tone of her voice. "Yes?"

"I told the girls something."

Oh god, his cheeks were blushing. "You..."

"I'm so sorry!" Roxanne apologized. "But they were nagging the hell out of me and I... I..."

"_Sooo_... how did they react?" Megamind asked, somewhere between nervousness and curiosity.

"Well..."

"Were they disappointed?"

"Um, Megs..." She started and sat down on his lap. "I lied."

It didn't seem he was getting what she was saying. "You lied? About what?"

"I, um..." Roxanne chewed her lips, trying to figure out just how to phrase this. "I told them you had tentacles."

His body was suddenly shaking under her. It confused her at first; what was going on? But then he burst out in laughter. "You... You said... Hah! Seriously? Oh, I wish I'd been there to see it!"

"What? You're not mad I told them you have-"

"Pft, _no! _I just wish I'd thought of that weeks ago!" He seemed to find it funny, still chuckling and wiping away a few tears.

"Really?"

"Yes! Now they're off my back! Roxanne, you're a genius," Megamind stated and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "So, how _did _they react?"

"Remmy was happy about it, but Fire was actually disappointed. It seemed they had a bet, and she lost."

"No fireworks or a victory dance?"

"No!"

"Huh. We'll that's kind of a downer. I should teach them a thing or two about presentation."

Now that she was certain Megamind wasn't mad at her, she relaxed again.

Re-settling herself with one leg on either side of his thin body, she pinned him to the chair. She purred as she let a finger softly caress the back of his ear. "You're the master of that, after all."

Roxanne watched as the cheeks again turned slightly purple. "Um..." Touching his ear had instantly turned his brain to unusable mush; she knew it by the way his eyes widened and the fingers at her hip dug into her flesh.

"So, are you sure there's no tentacles down there I've missed?"

"No, not that ... I... know... of..."

A nail gently scratched his thin skin, making him gasp. "Maybe _I _can find some you haven't found?"

In the next moment, she was swept up in his arms and carried away to the bedroom to find out whether or not he _actually had_ tentacles. As she was lying in his bed, cuddled up against the blue, still panting chest, Roxanne had to wonder.

If she'd told them the truth, that the only difference was the colour, would Fire have won the bet?

* * *

**Remmy and I don't have a bet, but if we did, it would be like this:**

**Remmy: Retractable**

**Fire: Normal, but BLUE :D**

**But the topic WILL COME UP AGAIN! Because, well, we know we can't truly trust Roxanne on this. So...**

**Remmy, let's TAKE OFF HIS PANTS!**


	26. Chapter 26

**WE WILL TAKE UVER ZE WORLD WITH COOKEEZ!~ Remmy**

**Wondering whether or not I should write that he had tentacles. After seeing too many of DS-Hina's fanart, the tentacles has grown on me.**

Not ON me... you get what I mean!~ Fire

* * *

**Remmy and Fire'****s Golden Crab Nuggets**

_As you might or might not know, 'Falling Through' and 'Living in 3D' are based on the weird messages between Remmy and me. I have here saved some of our best messages, for you to enjoy._

_So find the popcorn and lean back: these are the messages between two weird fans!_

**Following content contains**

**-terrible, terrible, terrible grammar!**

**-smut, smut and even more smut**

**-weird teens discussing weird stuff (and junk)**

* * *

**Remmy****: ****HURRAY FOR BLUE ALIENS!**

**Blue SEXY aliens!**

_Fire: the bluer, the sexier :D_

**Remmy****: ****In media, we've been learning about colours and stuff, and blue means 'peacefullness'...**

_Fire: Hm... No, no it HAS to mean blue-alien-with-totaly-sexy-goatee!_

* * *

**Remmy****: ****anyway, back to the sexy blue alien ^^...am I the only one here feel weird saying that about a cartoon?**

**Don't get me wrong, I say it alot in my head...to another person? Nope**

_Fire: I'm so used to say it O.o But mostly online! And to a few of my friends ^^ Watched Megamind for the seventh time last night: I had a friend over whom I haven't seen in a long time. She'd seen the movie before too, but we agreed to see it again. And we both agreed- Megamind's goatee is HOT! Rawr!_

_LOL smileyface..._

**Remmy: Of course it is, its smexy =)**

* * *

**Remmy (about my fanfic 'Temptress'): RO****XANNE TONGUE F*** HIS EAR!**

**Lets just hope Megamind's ears were clean ^^**

_Fire: Wow, Remmy, you make it sound so naughty! XD It wasn't like she stuck a ** in there ;) LOL- THAT would be a fic!_

_Fire: Huh- fanfic have removed the word dil-do..._

**Remmy: ****hahaha I don't think Megamind would appreciate that though...he IS dating a woman...**

**ha, say if Megamind didn't have ANYTHING down there, would he used a strap-on dil-do?**

**And is like that =(**

_Fire: I think he'd invent some really... naughty things ;)_

**Remmy: ****hahah he would...**

**oops, Megamind saw the context of this message...hehehe he is a deep purple...**

**Megamind: I THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T TALKING ABOUT ME!**  
**Me: I WASN'T IN THE OTHER MESSAGE!**

**lolz =) =)**

_Fire: MM looks at the other message. Freezes for a sec...  
MM: YOU PERVERTED TEENS! GET BACK HERE!  
*Fire and Remmy running laughing for the door*_

**Remmy****: HEY! DON'T BLAME US! BLAME T.V AND MOVIES FOR IT'S WAYS OF MAKING EVERYTHNG DIRTY!**

**WE GOT CORRUPTED I TELL YOU! CORRUPTED!**

**Soo, DO you have anything down there Megamind? *puts hands up* I can NOT be a PROPER fan who is a TEEN without wondering that...same goes for Buttercup (Bfire, your new nickname)**

**Oh and Megamind? It could be WAY worse. At least we are still calling you 'Megamind'**

_Fire__: I'm also known under the name of Guppy... one, two, three... What were we talking about?_

_MM: Roxanne! Those brats are pervs!_  
_RR: What are they saying?_  
_MM: They... they are discussing my junk..._  
_*Fire and Remmy shows up*_  
_Me: Roxanne, care to fill us in?_  
_Remmy: Because if you do, we won't have to discuss any more, you know!_  
_Everyone stares at each other for a minute. Roxanne grins._  
_RR: OK, girls, listen up..._  
_MM: ROXANNE!_

_I like to pretend we have somehow fallen into their universe. But since the portal was damaged, we had to stay in Megamind's lair, waiting for him to repair it._

**Remmy: ****HAHAH YES! THIS WOULD MAKE A VERY GOOD CRACK!FIC!**

**Megamind: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**  
**Me: YES! Sorry, Blue, you're the hero now...*To Bfire* why 'Guppy'? I'm also called Skittles**  
**Megamind: *sighs in relief***  
**Me: *tries to pull MM's pants down but lether to tigh* DAMN!**  
**MM: HEY! *hides behind Roxanne***  
**Me: *Clicks fingers; Minion shows up in his fishbowl but no robot body* YEAH! *hugs Minion***  
**Bfire: *Notices stares I am getting* Minion's her favourite character..**  
**Me: Actually, Bfire might not discuss Megamind's junk anymore, but I probably still speak about it...through I got one question, IS IT RETRACTABLE!**

**I wonder how many reviews we would get for this? and I mean NICE reviews, not flames?**

**And with your permission, CAN I write it?**

**Remmy: Me: *In an innocet voice that immeidatly attracts suispicion* Sky Blue, guess what I did?  
MM: 'Sky Blue'?  
Me: *shrugs* Blame Fire...and GUESS WHAT I DID?  
MM: No, I don't trust you or your friend  
Me: *blinks* well it's good you don't trust me cause guess what I did?  
Fire: JUST TELL US ALREADY!  
Me: *shakes head* not unless Megamind guesses first**

_Fire: In the meantime...  
Me: Sooo... Minion... Uhm... I've got an embarrasing question...  
Minion looks up from the pile of clothes he is about to wash: Okeeey...?  
I sigh...  
Me: OK... Minion... Can you teach me how to wash clothes?_

_Silence._

_Minion: Let's get to work!_

_Yes, I don't know how to wash clothes..._  
_And I'm called Guppy because I've got a very VERY bad memory... VERY bad!_  
_And go ahead! Maybe I'll draw some stuff as well ^^ Hey, we should both write oneshots about this!_

**Remmy: ****Don't worry, I just learn how to wash clothes at the start of this year because my mother got sick...AND YEAH!**

**P.S, DON'T WASH TOWELS WITH CLOTHES! And you don't wash white clothes with pink or red clothes...or any bright colours...but mostly pink and red.**

**I prefer to do a chapter fic...**

**MM: WAIT! NOW YOU ARE GOING TO PUBLISH THIS?**  
**Me: *smiles evill* Yep *turns to Minion* great, your in the robot suit, *mumbles* stupid fear of heights *Stops mumbling* also, my Crack!video I want to put up on youtube keeps failing =( and trust me Fire...this pic was WAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY WORSE! And the wierd thing is? No one died nor did it have mature content..**

_Fire: Me: ah, the gift of dirty fan art.  
*Turns to Megs*  
Me: And yes, yes we ARE publishing this! And I have to say... THIS IS GONNA BE AWSOME!_

* * *

**Remmy: Me: I'VE GOT WORDART OPEN BECAUSE ON I.N.K (a kid cartoon series) SO I WILL START WRITING! *to Fire* No, it wasn't dirty art at ALL; it was well it was a crack!pairing...  
Chapter One is called 'Megmid's junk'  
MM: *wide eyes* You-you-you-you PERVERTS! *searches for D-gun*  
Me: He is ONLY going to de-hydrate us, isn't he?  
Fire: *shrugs* he's the good guy now, so I guess so.**

_Fire: Me: But just in case... RUN!  
*Grabs Remmy's arm and drags her with me through the portal and INTO 3D WORLD*_

**Remmy: Me: *looks around to see basically the same as our world* huh, I though 3D world would look more...different? Wanna get baby stories of Megamind from the prison?  
Fire: Sure...but which prisoner to ask?  
Me: *thinks* we could look up the history wait no, that's too boring...You know what we could do?  
Fire: What?  
Me: BEAT UP TITAN!  
*Megamind is heard sceaming in the background*  
Me: *gulps* He didn't go into my DA journal entries page did he?  
****Fire: RUN!  
*we run...somewhere***

* * *

**Remmy: ****what do YOU think his junk looks like? *puts hands up in surrendor* sorry, if your saw most of the movies I go to at the cinema you would realise Im a total alien-fan sometimes fangirl hehehe sooo**

_Fire: __I think his... well... human... Blue- but 'human' ^^ Because I want him as close to the human race as possible in order for him and Roxanne to have a baby ^^ Blue, pink head. __*blush blush*_

_MOAHAHA! I have winter's holliday this week!_

**Remmy: haha now I can't stop thinking WHAT Megamind junk looks like...I have no life, well I do but its full of a blue alien and wond****ering what his junk looks like**

**Does he even HAVE any? Cause the lether he wore didn't really reveal anything AND it was tight as...maybe cause it is a kiddie movie? Well meant to be...is it retractable?**

**Sorry, once I ask something to myself I have to wonder all the time...**

**And the retractable thing, would that be awesome or no? Cause if he got a boner, well he could retract it...why am I talking about this again?**

_Fire: I'm laughing here ^^ retractable boner XD Comes in handy whenever he kidnaps Roxanne! __LOL!_

* * *

**Remmy: and koolo, ... Sorry for all the dots, but its fun to type then!**

_Fire:___.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~._.~*~.__

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

_**Remmy: **_**Your cwazy, vweary cwazy...**

* * *

**Remmy: hehehe have you ever wondered what the characters thought about us fanpeople talking like that?**

**Especially Megamind to our prior discussion about his junk...**

_Fire__: I think about that all the time! Wonder if they can? If everyone in our immaginations exicts on some level... Heey! Level backwards is level!_

_I think we are making them very embarrased XD_

**Remmy: hmm...I dnk how we are making Minion embarrased...hahaha cool, level is level backwards hahaha shut spelled backwords is 'tush' hahahaha...**

**I think we are making Megamind especially embarraseed with what everyone on this fandom wondering what his junk looks like (I know everyone has thought about it some time!)**

**Sooo...wats new in the land of Norwegian? (I spelt that wrong didn't I?)**

_Fire: The release date is probably later here in Norway :( But until then- I look forward to see 'tangled' :D I have afree cinema ticket that needs to be used :)_

_New in Norway... hm... We have won a lot of gold medals in World Championship in skiing! and we are still searching for the boat 'berserk' that has gone lost somewhere in the ocean around the South Pole!_

_You can't think Megamind and not think junk ;) New interesting thought: does he have any hair down there?_

_O.o_

**Remmy: Good question, he doesnt have hair on his brilliant head but DOES have a goatee...now I wish he was real so I can find out...**

**Why is it every time I pm u, I end up talking about Megamind's junk? Siriusly...through one time me and my friend were discussing how to tell if a fish is female or male (she wanted one) and ended up talking about Minion and the tentacle thingies on the back of him...and wether for his species that a certain amount that they have are signs of males and the ones with less are females?**

**There's 5 on Minion (yes, I counted, shut up)...I just spent the last 10 minutes making sure I was correct...shut up**

**Back to Megamind's junk and me questioning WHY everytime I either pm you or read your fics...I end up talking about his junk (PMing) or wondering (reading)**

**YOU ARE USING A MIND CONTROL DEVISE AREN'T YOU?**

**haha, no siriusly why?**

**AND how DO you tell the difference between female and male fish? (talking about Earth fish)**

**Ok...back to the question wether Mega has hair down there...well it would depend how much he looked like a human down there yeah? Through theres the problem with hair only in one area (which we can see and make it still be a kiddie movie)...hmm good question...**

**If the characters were real I bet Megamind is blushing purple right now what with all the talk about his junk (or he probably is saying 'no thats wrong' 'close' 'yep thats there' or both.)**

_Fire: __Oh god! I'm at school eating my lunch and almost ended up laughing it all out again! LOL!_

_Oh no- my mind controll device is no longer a secret! I was planning on using it on my teachers in order to get off easy!_

_About fish's sex- it's different from race to race, but the easiest way is to cut them up and see if they got eggs or 'melke'._

* * *

_Fire: Size: probably average. Because there is NO way you'd manage to have anything bigger than that inside those tight pants!  
Colour: I've always pictured it blue with *giggle* pink head... *giggle again*_

_Tentacles... It would be so awsome if Metro Man had it and not Megamind! And they would be white and gold! With STARS! :D :D :D_

_Oh my- this is totaly getting out of hand..._  
_Or is it?:_

_:D :D :D :D :D :D I got a heart attack when seeing this. My funeral is on Sunday._

**Remmy: OMG I'M TALKING TO A GHOST!****! OR ZOMBIE!**

**Hey, just because zombies cant talk doesnt mean they cant type...**

**and also, the average size, what would happen to his seed count if it's bigger then average and NOT retractable (remember, the creaters COULD picture him with a bulge but since its supposed to be 'kid-friendly'...well are you following where I'm going with this?**

**hahaha white and gold with stars tentacles, I have an urge to draw that now! lolz and I wondered where he got his 'uniform' inspiration from...**

**What I think Megamind's junk looks like:**

**Size: (still not sure, there's that retractable thing I cant picture him without)**  
**Retractable: Yep**  
**Colour: Blue with purple head *giggle***  
**Anything else: Maybe not cut if its retractable...**

**haha...if the stars were embarrased about our talk from last time, imagine them hearing this one!**

**hahaha...now I have an urge to write 'What the Megamind stars think of my thoughts about their junk' and have them write letters saying**

**'STOP TALKING ABOUT MY JUNK!'**

**Oooh, maybe Roxanne could fill us in about Megmaind's junk!**

**Alright something unrelated to a certain blue alien's junk...I've got a cut right above the back of my ankle and I have no idea how I got it...**

**Back to the junk: You know what would be funny? If the creaters of Megamind thought Megamind was more human 'down there' and Metroman was more alien 'down there'...**

**I'm still laughing about your comment of metroman hahaha =)**

**hahaha now I'm imagining what Metroman and Megamind's face would look like about this whole thing...**

**Hey, have you read 'Fish Crimes' I cant remeber who the author is but go read it! (its in the Megamind section cause DUH!)**

**hahah I wrote section as sextion before changing it hahaha...**

**Ok, going to talk about 'Metro Cover', you know how Megamind feels like he's 'missing' something after doing the deed with Roxanne and how Minion said it was because with Megamind's species the male was pregnant first but that humans weren't a match for his dna so he feels 'empty'?**

**Well, lets say, he IS comaptiable with humans and the MALES of his species are pregnant FIRST! And lets say Minion doesnt know this at all either because of some reason...what do you think their reaction is if one time after Roxy and Megamind do it and Megamind 'gets pregnant' but they didnt know a simple kiss would transfer the baby to Roxanne after say 3 weeks?**

**That was random but I needed to ask that...so what do you think their reaction would be?**

_Fire__(About the totally awesome fanfiction Metro Cover): please draw Metroman star-tentacles :D It would be totaly awsome!_

_reaction..:_  
_"WHAT THE HELL! You're PREGNANT?" Roxanne'jaw had just gone back up, and was now used to get out her feelings._  
_"Uh... yeah?" Megamind started to bite his fingernails, looking at her with a 'please don't blame me' look._  
_"B-But... Minion... Minion said..."_  
_"yeah, well, seems he was wrong. Strange, huh?"_  
_"Oh, I'm gonna FRY that fish!" Roxanne started to walk around the room. How? How on earth... no, change that to the UNIVERSE, was it possible? Gawd!_  
_megamind followed her with his eyes. A blue hand trailed down to his stomach. Pregnant... That meant... family._  
_With a sigh he went over to the couch and sat down. Prengant..._  
_After Roxanne's 19'th lap around the living room, she finally started to calm down. She had a glimpse over at her boyfriend. He had his head in his hands (say THAT ten times, Remmy!) and looked utterly... sad..._  
_Pregnant... That meant... a baby? She blinked. A baby... with Megamind._  
_'Strange, huh'. yes, it was strange. But when she now had calmed down and started to think- maybe strange wasn't such a bad thing?_  
_Megamind felt the couch tip a bit to the side as Roxanne sat down next to him. He jumped when he felt her warm hand on his, pulling it away from his head so that she could hold it properly._  
_"I'm sorry," she said. He looked up, confused._  
_"For what?"_  
_"For my reaction. I shouldn't have yelled, it was stupid of me." Her blue eyes was filled with something unreadable. Maybe it was... a sort of surrender? Or maybe a sparkle of happiness?_  
_"It was a natural reaction," he whispered. She gave him a sad smile._  
_"Still. Megs, I'm done now. I'm not upset anymore."_  
_"you're not?"_  
_"No." She let her free hand cup his chin._  
_"I'm happy."_

_I'm not going to bother reading that one through!_

* * *

**Remmy: OMG! At the end of the movie, when Megamind leans back saying 'I'm just kidding' YOU CAN SEE A LITTLE BULGE!****! HAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**PRROF THAT HE DOES HAVE SOMETHING THERE!**

**Check it for yourself, go to youtube type in 'Megamind-I'm bad' and click on the clip!**

**THERE'S A SLIGHT BULGE IN HIS PANTS!**

**OMGOMGOMG!**

_Fire: HAHA! I can't believe just went to youtube just to look at Megamind's junk! Blush!_

_We must spread this new information to the world!_

_Megamind has got something there!_

* * *

_Fire: reading limericks online. They aren't popular in Norway, but this is really funny! Giggle- I found a bad one, mature content ahoy:_

_There once was a man from Nantucket_  
_Whose ** was so long he could suck it_  
_He said with a grin_  
_Wiping sperm from his chin_  
_If my ear was a ** I could ** it!_

_Giggle... Oh, BFire92- GROW UP! No more naughty jokes for me!_

_Oh what the H..._

_There was a young gigolo named Bruno_

_Who said, "Screwing's one thing I do know._

_While women are fine,_

_And sheep are divine,_

_Llama's are numero uno!"_

_Fire: Oh- two quick ones: you got long or short hair and is it dark or light?  
Wow- does I sound like a rapist or what? No worries, it's just to my doodles ^^_

* * *

**Remmy: You know what I reckon would be funny?**

**If me or you drew a door and haad little speech coming out of it that makes it sound like Megamind and Roxanne are having sex but it was something else they were doing? For example:**

***CLOSED door* Roxanne: OW! It's too big!**  
**Megamind: It's not to big! Your too small!**  
**Roxanne: *groan* IT'S TOO BIG!**

***open door, to find Megamind trying to sew clothes for Roxanne because...because...because I took Minion away from them***

**End Example**

**Yeah, something like that...**

_Fire: Or when Megamind check out my computer without premission:_

_Megamind: "Oh- ! Let's see what she writes about me... Messages, RemmyBlack. Mohahaha- this is going to be fun. Let's see... 'Megamind is so awsome', 'Minion is so cute'... bla bla bla... 'Megamind's...'_  
_*suddenly stares at computer, slowly turning purple*_  
_I come in the door._  
_Me: "Megs, the brainbot stole my history book, could you... What are you doing?"_  
_*still stares at computer*_  
_Me: "Megs, are you on my computer?" *starts to blush.* "You didn't... didn't check out my profile on..."_  
_*Megamind glances over at me*_  
_*put my hands over my face*_  
_Me (in norwegian): "Åh... svarte faen..."_

_*Megamind runs out the door*_

* * *

**Remmy: hahah OMG, I ended up taking an hour reading your 'Temptress'**

**Because I ended up wondering how far MY eyebrows go up...**

**Just to declare, I'm making Megamind very close to us humans...**

_Fire: Giggle ^^ You sat for an HOUR thinking about your EYEBROWS? Laughing can be heared up north! And just to say it- my eyebrows are nothing near as flexing as Megs!_

**Remmy: No, I sat for HALF AN HOUR thinking bout my eyebrows then the other HALF SEEING how flexible there were...**

**And my eyebrows aren't that flexible =( there's goes the flirting...WAIT! I CAN STILL BAT MY EYELASHES!**

**I LOVE MY EYELASHES!**

**They are naturally long...^^**

**Remmy: haha I was re-reading a message because I needed something that I 4got but it has came to the conclusion...we have embarrased Megamind, Roxanne and Metro *coughs* sorry Tentacle Man (you thought I was going to say Music Man didn't you?) but have yet to embarras the Space Fish...**

**And since Minion is my favourite character at the mo (mo=moment) I either have to embarras him or my all of my plot bunnies will kill him off (I will explain if you ask)**

**So...the little tentacles on Minion? Are they his thingy? or what?**

**hahaha now I made you think of fish junk! Hahahh**

_Fire: YES you DID make me think about fish junk XD  
You know what I've wondered about? Minion DOES have two shining balls on his tentacles...  
Is that approved in a family movie? ;)_

**Remmy: Omg when I read 'Minion DOES have two shining balls on his tentacles' I laughed soo much..then after my laughing fit I went to google images and found out that Minion DOES have them...th****en I laughed all over again...**

**I can't believe we are talking about a Space Fish's junk...and I thought thinking about Megamind and Tentacle Man's junk was bad...**

**if the tentacles ARE Minion's junk...we need a new name for Music Man**

**LOL, just had an image of Minion seeing this...Megamind's too scarred to look at any computer again and Music Man is probably trying not to think about the new name we gave him...**

**Megamind: STOP TALKING ABOUT ME!**  
**Me: I'm not talking bout you, I'm talking bout Minion...and Metro Man**  
**Megmind: O.o that's fine...wait, why are you talking about Minion?**  
**Me: err, you don't want to know why...and you don't want to know the context...**

**Sooo...lolz if Minion's tentacles turn out to be his junk (we decide of course)...we will need a new name for Music Man because, well you should get it.**

_Fire: Walking into my living room and suddenly realizes a blue alien is standing there, looking rather angry.  
Me: Ups  
MM: WHY are you and this austrailan talking about Minion's... stuff...  
Me (blushing badly): Heh... You know how it's like. Teens, you know. Hormons everywhere!  
MM: Uhu- so you expect those hormons to explain these! *Holds up a bunch of papers with written words*  
I take them and look at them,  
Me: how... when... my stories...  
MM: you left your com-pauter open.  
Me: Heh... Yeah. So, you're gonna de-hydrate me now, right?  
MM: Oh yeah!_

**Remmy: *growls at Megamind like one would with a bad-behaving dog* MEGAMIND! DON'T DEHYDRATE MY FRIEND!**

**She's the only one that's crazy enough to talk about these topics with me =(**

**and need I remind you I have Minion with me?**

**And also, WHAT IS HAPPENING DOWN THERE MEGAMIND? SERIOUSLY?**

***remembers something* You don't have a machine-thingy that can see my dreams do you?**

_Fire: Megamind stares at the two teens.  
MM: Okeeey... Let me get this right. You two are sitting in this world talking about my stuff.  
Remmy: Right!  
MM: And READING about my stuff?  
Remmy: AND writing about it  
Me *couching*  
MM: What?  
Me *coughing again': fanfic...  
MM: You are actually WRITING about my... my...  
Me: And drawing you and Roxanne... naked... in bed... *cough*_

**Remmy: Me: Actually Fire's drawing you and Roxanne in bed...I'm drawing Tentacle Man...*Turns to Fire* Do they know who Tentacle Man is?  
MM: *slowly* No-ooo...  
Me: It's our name for Metro/Musi Man..told you it could be worse for you...*remembers something* AH! NO! GROSS THING! GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!  
MM: *stares* what is she talking about? And WHERE is my D-gun?  
Me: *rolling on the floor still yelling* I HATE YOU! GET OUT! STUPID PLOT-GREENBUNNY! *holds up D-gun to Plot-Greenbunny* STOP WITH THAT STUPID ONESHOT OR YOU DIE! *plot-greenbunny rips up Oneshot; me sighs* Finally *notices stares* Hey, if YOU knew what it wanted, YOU would threaten to kill it too.  
RR: It was a BUNNY!  
Me: Correction: PLOT-GREENBUNNY! And if Megamind thinks me and Fire's little messages are bad..well what the plot-greenbunnt had like a million times worse.  
Fire: What WAS it?  
Me: *shakes head* All I am saying is that the P-GB got its pot from DA who someone draw something and they hated Roxanne.**

_Fire: Me: I remeber seeing an art once of Roxanne hanging from the roof with her ropes in a way that seemed VERY plesant...  
MM: WHAT?  
Remmy: Oh, so want to see that!  
Me: You should see that awsome drawing of Metro Man and Megamind that I found! Let's say, Megamind finally fournd a way to keep Metro down *giggle*  
MM: WHAAAT? OK, this is going too far!  
Remmy: Hey, it's not like we are taking off your pants! *looks to me* Or should we?  
I grin  
MM: No! No way!  
Remmy: So Roxanne is the only one who gets to know what's between your legs? Come on, we are true FANS!  
ME: To be honest, I'd like to keep a few things in my imagination. But question: how the hell did you get here, Megs?  
MM points to a doorway, filled with blue light: Portal! My name's not Megamind for no reason, you know!  
Remmy: Fire, I think we were just handed a brilliant opportunity to go on 'vacation'.  
__Me: Remmy, I like the way you think!_

**Remmy: Me: YOU MEAN TENTACLE MAN! And I really should go to bed, it's 10 past 10 in Australia on a saturday so my body clock reckons it time for bed.  
Fire: And we ARE true fans!  
Me: And Sky Blue, you just made a way for us to continue to bug you MWAHAHAHAHAHA**

_Fire: Here in Norway it's 13.15. I'm still in my gown, really!_

_And this doesn't end here ;) This is So going to be written down!_

**Remmy: ****I'm trying to figure out what 13:15 is, I don' do 24 hr time, I only do 12 hour.  
Yep, I am going to start on this 2morrow ^^**

**MM: NOOOOOOO!**  
**Me: Now Roxanne, are you going to tell us abut Sky Blue's junk or do I need to pull his pants down to satsify my hormones? *Shrugs* Hey, I have an excuse, I'm menstruating and Megamind having a goatee doesn't really help.**  
**MM: Hey, what does my goatee have to do with anything?**  
**Me and Fire: DUH! IT'S HOT!**  
**MM: *blinks***  
**RR: *blinks***  
**Minion: *blinks***  
**Me: *blinks***  
**Fire: *blinks***

**Silence...**

**Me: DO YOU LIKE WAFFLES?**

_Fire: BEST. ENDING. EVER! It HAS to be used!_

_Me: Yeah, WE LIKE WAFFLES! Where's your kitchen, Minion, I'll teach you how to do them VIKING style!_

* * *

_And it's a quarter past 1 in the afternoon ;)_

_Fire: And I've just eaten my saturday-candy (norwegian custom) so I'm totaly sugar high right now!_

**Remmy: ****Wait, it's a CUSTOM to EAT CANDY on A SATURDAY?**

**Damn, now I wish they put Norway as one of the places to go for EF overseas High school**

**I would love an excuse to get sugar high!**

**And my attempts are bad drawings but VERY mature (funny thing I am VERY good at drawng male antonmy but the rest of the body?**

**It mucks up)**

_Fire: I SUCK at male anathomy..._

_Yes, it is! In Norway, we usually don't eat much candy the rest of the week, but when Saturday arrives..._

_Get me my chips and chocolate, goddammit!_

**Remmy: Hey, you know how in shows and movies and stuff, whenever the girl's on her period she always craves chocolate?**

**Guess what I crave?**

**Carrots...I crave carrots**

**sometimes carrots dipped in salso (yummier then it sounds)**

* * *

_Fire: facts about me:  
-Since I attend an agriculture school, I know how to weld, smith and cut down a tree.  
-I'm creative (thanks to my also creative mother)  
-When I'm alone, I talk to myself... in english or danish  
-Actually, I'm a Danish citizen. My mother is danish and my father is half, so I'm 75% danish. But I live in Norway, have always lived here, and feel more Norwegian than Danish  
-I listen to all kinds of music, but NOT heavy and opera. As little techno as possible  
-Whenever a friend is being bullied, I stand up to them. This has lead me into many fights. Once I got my butt kicked by the school's strongest boy, because he called my friend (or was it me, don't remember) fat and that made me snap.  
-Can't handle stress. __At all. I start cyring..._

* * *

_Fire: Anywaaaaay..._

_MM: Yaaawn... Thirsy_  
_*one o clock in the nigh. Megs goes into the kitchen after waking up. Gonna get a glass of water. He turns on the light and find a teenage girl with an arm into the cookie jar and the mouth full of cookie._  
_MM: ?_  
_Me: ... swallow_

_Pause..._

_Me *Points*: HERREGUD! GIGANT ANTS!_  
_MM: What? WHERE?_  
_*Turns to look at ants.*_  
_MM: ?_  
_Turns back. No Fire._

_No cookies.  
MM: Sigh... I'm going back to bed._

* * *

**Remmy: This is the many things I can't think/look at/talk about without thinking something gross:  
Mcain...something oer in the Monsters vs Alien forum and talking about Link (fishape)  
Jellyfish...they have tentacles and the word 'fish' in their name  
ANY TYPE OF SEA ANIMAL THAT ISN'T A DOLPHIN...you don't want to know  
Minion...due to our talks  
Bananas...that's self-explanotory  
Anything in our world that has tentacles...due to our discussions**

_Fire: Oh, would you know- I WAS PMS'ing! Huh, my hormons actually do make me write smutt! At first I thought it was just a laime escuse, but it's a fact. Now, my hip is going to hurt tomorrow... Always do when I'm on my period.  
Which reminds me: next chap I'm actually writing about that ^^_

_ANY type of sea animals?_

_Even crabs?_

**Remmy: Let's just say 'Crab Walk' isn't innocence to me anymore**

* * *

**Remmy: ****COOKIES!**

_Fire: ..._

_Remmy,the only_ _cookie songs I know_ _are from sesamy_ _stree_t...

**_Sex songs :D :D :D_**  
**t_his is the english version of 'Alvedansen'- 'Elf Dance': /watch?v=i1Ge_ngHySQ&feature=related_**  
**_Sex sex and_ _more_ sex...**

**Remmy: ****I just yelled 'Cookies' because I felt like it**

**ooh SEX!**

_Fire: You give love a bad name..._

_Bad to the bone! That one's abot sex :D_

**Remmy: Best part is- Mostly everyone says it's Megamind's theme song ;)**

* * *

_Fire: __TENTACLE MAN!_

**Remmy: I think we should find out IF Metro/Music has tentacles down here**

**and people wonder why I scream when other people say 'jellyfish tentacles'...**

_Fire: it's 12.30 here! I'v egot two hours off before my nex class... And that means: UPLOADING STORIES :D :D :D  
Man, wonder if writing all the time on my computer is good for my fingers O.o_

_Listening to You Shook Me All Night Long :D_

**Remmy: What's with you and sex songs?**

**I found my ipod yesterday =)**

_Fire: U lost it? O.o  
Nooo , Minion stole it to listen to some music while doing laudry!_

_Sleeping in my car, I will caress you! Sleeping in my car..._

* * *

_Fire: Hel-ve-te ^^_

_Wonder if I can think up any others to use... dritt, dust, jævla, svenskefaen, spyttslikker..._

_GIGANT ANTS!_

**Remmy: Giant Ants: Go away or I WILL KILL YOU!**

**Normal-sized ants: Not you, I can deal with you living...**

_Fire: Ever tried to take a walk in the forest with slippers when there's ants everywhere?  
__Those F'ers bite hard! OUCH!_

* * *

_Fire: Yey- my russe-clothes are ready :D The babtism is in two weeks and that starts the russe-celebration. All seniors, dressed in colour coded clothes, getting drunk and doing weird stuff ^^_

**Remmy: ****uhhhhhhh okkk**

_Fire: :D I'm red coded :D It's the most common one, but still cool!_

**Remmy: uhhhh *head explodes***

**Thanks alot Fire**

_Fire: But I go to school woth both black and greed coded :D :D :D_

_*secretly hopes for Remmy to blow up further*_

_**Remmy: **_**you-me-the-mean-your-m-m-mea-****

_Fire: Wonder if I shall take the knot about running naked over the bridge... Totally gonna do the one about sleeping over in the middle of a roundabout!_

_OK- just to make it easier (gotta love wikipedia)_

_Tradition dictates that each russ wears an overall during the entire russefeiring (russ celebration period). The colour of the overall should match the graduate's line of study: Red for courses that are geared towards higher education (this is the most common colour), blue for courses in Business (also higher education in economics and management), black for Engineering (such as mechanics or electrics), and green for agricultural fields_

_On my school, they have a class with horses, and they get black as well._

**Remmy: ****oh ok thanks ^^**

_Fire: __But it would be funnier to keep trying to make yo blow up!_

_I'm in the committee at my school, and a whole lot of the knots involve us. Like making out with someone in the commettee for ten minutes._

**Remmy: My head isn't going to blow up again (we have an agreement, it can only explode once a day)**

**so...BLAH**

* * *

**Remmy (about 'Falling Through'): YOU DRUNK FISH POO!**

**hehehehehehehee...no, I'm not letting you forget it mwahahaha**

_Fire: Noooo- not poo- only fishy water with vodka ;)_

_And I don't except you to forget it ^^ Feel free to bring it up at any time to make me embarrased :D_

**Remmy: How do you know Minion doesn't poo in his bowl?**

**For all you know, you could of unknowingly drunk fish poo**

_Fire: Well, he HAS that huge machine on his back, I bet it kind of... cleans it..._

...

_Fine- I drank Minion-water!_

**Remmy: hehe now I'm picturing a tiny little toilet for Minion**

**and I'm soo tellng Megs that! =) =) =) =) =)**

* * *

_Fire: you know what hit me? I was watching 'Megamind' (again) and noticed that Minion isn't sooo much taller than Megs. I read somewhere that Megamind is about 1.67 m, and I'm 1.69. __So I'm almost as tall as Minion :D_

**Remmy: Damn, I'm shorter then all of you =(**

**I'm still telling Megamind you drunk fishy-water and possibly poo ^^**

**So now that we proved tht we r both girls and not old grannies...what's ur actual name?**

**You don't have to tell if you don't want to...**

* * *

_Fire: Stalker questions... Staaaalker queeestiooons..._

_OK, do you know how to surf? (the stereotype Australian is a tanned, strong surfer who beat up sharks or a man with a cool hat who beat up crocodiles.)_

**Remmy: Actually no, I've always lived to far from the ocean to be bothered.**

**I'm a farm girl**

**I've never seen Crocidle Dundee to be honest, the only Australian Icon I've actually bothered to be interested in was Steve Irwin and that's just because I love animals...**

**Stalker Question: Weirdest dream EVA! That you have had.**

_Fire: Ooo...  
Let's see... I was in a maze. Then I found a place with a table with a book and a witch. Then I was on teh road next to my house, and a dude fromTV had his head flying in mid air and there was a car race in the distance. Then I came up to my house, and went inside the garage (which was weird because we don't have a garage) and there was some people from my class. And they said I had to kill myself! Then I saw my sister, and I called for her to help me. But then all my class mates turned to get her, so i took a stone and slammed into the head of one of the girls, and she fell and stared at me as she died..._

_Yeah, I killed a classmate. And she's really nice!_

* * *

_Fire: Stalker Question: Your fav marauderer shows up in your bedroom, wearing his birthday suit and says 'Take me! __Take me now!' Do you? Snigger..._

**Remmy: err...one problem...I can't choose between Remus and Sirius...**

**Scene 1:**

**Sirius: *pops* TAKE ME! TAKE ME NOW!**  
**Me: O.o *blushes* someone's drunk and your a guy, I'm a girl, so how the hell can I take you? (and yes, Fire, I know what it means, its just it usually the guy that takes the girl)**  
**Scene2 (with Remus):**

**Remus: *pops* TAKE ME! TAKE ME NOW!**  
**Me: O.o wait, how can I take him? *shrugs* oh well,just a dream right?**

**I couldn't really explain it without those scenes...plus you go to admit, you would think it is a dream...**

**Stalker Question: same question**

* * *

**Remmy: Take****Time To Read Each Sentence**

**This is this cat**

**This is is cat**

**This is how cat**

**This is to cat**

**This is keep cat**

**This is a cat**

**This is jerk cat**

**This is busy cat**

**This is for cat**

**This is forty cat**

**This is seconds cat**

**Now read the THIRD word of every line**

**hahahah! funnyness! I soo got you! =) =)**

_Fire: It's is wonderful to be home so I can laugh at your jokes! HAH! Yes, yes, I fell for it XD_

_If I would take him. HELL YEAH! And it's easy, just throw him on the bed and take the lead! Nooow, just lay all still, and I'll ** the brains out of you!_

_I'm making a thank-you drawing to Scarlet for making fanart ^^ You have Meg's boots and sit in his chair :D_

_Stalker question: Worst subject in school._

* * *

_Fire: REMMY! REMMY, WAKE UP, WE HAVE FANART! __*SCREAMS!*_

* * *

**Remmy: Stalker Question: Megamind pops into your room in his pjs (the one we see in the movie), you:**

**1. Pull down his pants to find out about his junk**  
**2. Scream then jump up and down in excitement (NO! NOT LIKE THAT YOU PERVET!)**  
**3. Wish someone else can share your experience so you don't think you've gone crazy**

_Fire: 3, deffinately 3! When I'm surprised I usually just freeze.  
Once, I thought I'd won 100 000 NKR on a scratchcard. For two seconds I just stared at it, totally frozen!_

_Then I saw that it wasn't 100 000, 100 000 and 100 000... It was a 10 000._  
_In other words, I was as poor as ever._

_Stalker Question: CARROTS!_

* * *

_Fire: Dear Megamind  
Please stop freaking out. You are making pulling off your pants VERY difficult!  
__Sincerely, Would you please just stand STILL?_

**Remmy: Dear Fire,  
Your pulling down his pants which happen to be leather aren't you?  
Sincerely, if you are, why not his pjs? At least they cotton**

_Fire: Dear Remmy  
I'll hold him, and YOU'LL pull down his pants, what'dya say?  
__Sincerely, STOP WRIGGLING, GODDAMMIT!_

**Remmy: Dear Fire  
DEAL! And you still haven't told me if he's in leather or pjs  
Sincerely, Megs, your just making it more embarrasing by trying to get away **

_Fire: Dear Minion and Roxanne  
Stop laughing and HELP ME!  
__Sincerely, Megamind_

**Remmy: Dear Megamind,  
It's you and your girlfriend's fauly that you are in this situation in the first place!  
****Sincerely, if you just told us in the first place**

_Fire: Dear Megamind  
Crap, your spandex is TIGHT! You are aware that kills the spems?  
Sincerely, the girl trying to hold you still._

_Dear Fire_  
_What? It does?  
Sincerely, Crap, didn't know that!_

**Remmy: Dear Megamind's pants,**

**FINALLY!**

**Sincerely, why couldn't we wait until he had his pyjamas on?**

**Dear Roxanne,**  
**Seriously, how the hell do you not lose your sex appeal with how long the pants take off?**

**Sincerely, Oh wait, he would be helping you**

_Fire: Stares_

_Dear Remmy_  
_HAH! YOU OWE ME A MILKYWAY!_  
_Sincerely, the girl doing a victory dance._

**Remmy: ****Dear Fire(i think),  
Why do I owe you a milky way?  
Sincerely, I said it was RETRACTABLE,not that it would stay in**

_Fire: Dear Remmy  
Du'uh- it's human and blue! Use your glasses!  
Sincerely, you seeing what I'm seeing?_

**Remmy: Dear Fire,  
I agreed with the human and blue part.  
Sincerely, it does not count**

**Dear girls,**  
**STOP DISCUSSING MY JUNK!**  
**Sincerely, you're about to get dehydrated...if you're lucky**

**Dear Minion,**  
**DON'T LET HIM DEHYDRATE ME!**

**Sincerely, going to be your shadow from now on**

_Fire: Dear pants  
WHERE THE HELL DD YOU GO TO  
Sincerely, the blue guy who misses you BADLY!_

**Remmy: Dear Roxanne,  
What colour is Megs sperm?  
Sincerely, is it purple?**

**Dear Minion,**  
**So...are your tentacles your thingy?**  
**Sincerely, sorry but I know the answer to Megs, so your next**

**Dear Fire,**  
**Good night,**  
**Sincerely, apparating to a different location now**

_Fire: Dear Remmy  
Good night! Sleep tight!  
Sincerely, Sending you a good night hug in my mind._

* * *

**OK, so I had some problems at the end here. Fanfiction suddely decided that I should no longer be allowed to mark content and change the letters from normal to thick or italic. Soo...**

**This is kind of an celebration over the fact that I've written 25 chapters to this story! Yay!**

**So, hopefully you now know how crazy we are.**

**Also in the beginning I wrote 'totaly' and 'awsome'. Thanks to writing English stories for threemonts I now know it's 'totaLLy' and 'awEsome'.**


	27. Chapter 27

**Dear Yahoo,**

**I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." Just saying... **

**Sincerely, Google**

* * *

**Google to the rescue**

It was the middle of the night when Minion woke up. This time, it wasn't because Remmy wanted to borrow the knock-out-spray (thankfully), but because of a low sound coming from somewhere in the Lair. It took him a couple of seconds before realizing it was whimpering. That was a sound he'd heard too many times before, ever since dodgeball several years ago.

As his nature demanded, he went to check it out, hoping it wasn't anything too serious.

On the couch, one of the girls lay wearing a night gown. Her face was pale and she was massaging her abdomen, whimpering at every breath.

"Miss Fire?"

Her eyes shot open, but kept half closed just like they would have been if she was sick.

"Oh, hi, Minion."

"Is something wrong?" It really looked like she was sick.

"No, no. Everything's fi-_ng..." _The word was cut off and she bit her lip, suppressing a new whimper.

"Miss Fire, if you're sick you can just say it."

"I'm not sick," she muttered, and sank down further in the couch. _"Faen ta moder natur." _Closing her eyes again, it looked like she was falling back to sleep, if it weren't for the fact that she still had a twisted grimace.

OK, so she wouldn't tell. Minion tapped the glass of his sphere just like he was tapping his chin. Fire was a rather shy girl whenever she was alone. But sometimes she would act tougher than she was, especially with the younger of the teens around. Maybe she was doing it now as well? Apparently she was rather embarrassed and-

...

_Oh! _

Oh, right! It was about a month ago since the girl had decided to wash her own underwear. OK, this was _not _his expertise. But he knew of something which could help.

Minion walked off silently, but came back again after ten minutes.

"Here, Miss Fire."

She peered out between heavy eyelids and looked at what he'd brought.

"Google to the rescue," he explained, and placed the things on the table. "Painkillers, a hot water bottle and one of your books to get your mind of the cramps."

Fire stared at the things for a moment, then whispering a _"Tusen takk, _Minion_," _her eyes a bit shiny.

"You're welcome, Miss Fire."

He went to power down again, but didn't go to sleep before the whimpering had stopped and was replaced with a heavy breathing. Now that he had girls in the Lair, he thought he'd better Google up some more about... girl stuff. It would probably come in handy again.

* * *

**I had the WORST cramps yesterday. Seriously, I got dizzy when I was walking! Yet, I had decided to make it through WITHOUT painkillers. Why? Dunno: to test my limits? Because I'm a sadist towards myself? Because I'm a weirdo with a soft spot for fluff, smutt and blood? **

**Anyway, I'm VERY bad a taking help. One of my negative sides. I refuse to take any help untill I have to or untill they help me without asking. But of course, when they first come to my aid, I just sigh, say 'thank you' and feel very happy that someone cares enough for me to overlook my objects and take care of me anyway.**


	28. Chapter 28

**I once made love to a female clown, and she twisted my penis into a poodle. ~Dean Whitney**

* * *

**Prejudiced witness**

She sat on his lap, resting her head against his shoulder while he caressed her hair. Both had experienced a long day; one interviewing, the other inventing, and they just relaxed together, feeling the comfortable silence that filled the Lair and-

"Ahem!"

They opened their eyes, seeing the two teens standing there with their arms crossed.

"Yes, girls?" Roxanne asked tiredly.

"Fire and I have decided that we don't believe you."

Megamind and Roxanne shared a confused expression.

"You don't believe what, exactly?" he asked.

"Your junk," Remmy said and Fire nodded. The two in the chair blushed in guilt.

"Um... my...?"

"Your junk," the girl repeated. "We have decided that Roxanne can't be trusted, and it's possible she lied to us the other day."

"It... It is?" Roxanne muttered. Crap, they were busted.

"_Du er et partisk vitne."_

Megamind rolled his eyes and pressed a button on his watch. From the translator in Fire's ear, the English version came out. _"You are a prejudiced witness."_

"Hey! Do you have a remote for this thing?" she gawked. "Is that legal?"

"Keep focus, Fire," Remmy reminded. "We believe Roxanne might have lied about the tentacles, and we intend to find out the truth, one way or another."

"Until then, keep snuggling. It's cute!"

Then they turned on their heels and marched off.

Roxanne and Megamind sat still for a moment in order to fully understand what on earth had just happened.

"Is that... Is that a threat?" he finally asked.

"I believe it is."

They blinked a few more times before it all sunk in.

"_Ah crap!"_

* * *

**Read 'Living in 3D' people! New chapter is coming soon, and Remmy have juicy details! (And the last chapter totally rocked too).**

**And I want you all to go to Scarlet Frost's Deviantart gallery! BECAUSE WE HAVE FANART :D Yay!**


	29. Chapter 29

"Boredom: the desire for desires"~Leo Nikolaevich Tolstoy

* * *

**Bored**

I sighed and slid down in the couch until it could barely be called sitting. _Herregud,_ I was _bored! _

Who'd think falling into such a great movie could be boring? But now, I was so bored, I was tempted to claw my eyes out just for something interesting to happen! I could do some more homework, but even though I'm a nerd, vectors just weren't interesting enough for me to get my books.

I sighed again, higher; as if that would help. I. Was. So. _Bored!_

"_Aaaah! _Minion, get it off! Get if off, get it off, get it off!"

The two aliens suddenly passed and my eyes widened. Megamind's cape was on fire, and Minion was struggling to get it off while his master was panicking.

"Get it off, get it off, get it off!"

With a grin I sat up.

I wasn't so bored anymore.

* * *

**Just as you think nothing interesting can happen, it does. Either something ignites, blow up or starts to 'warm up' without anyone touching it. Here the other day, the remains of the Battle Suit started to send out fireworks! Now, _that _was interesting!**


	30. Chapter 30

"There's a side of my personality that goes completely against the East Coast educated person and wants to be a pin-up girl in garages across America...there's a side that wants to wear the pink angora bikini!" ~Mira Sorvino

* * *

**Borrowing a Pin-Up**

"I'm bored."

I glanced over my text book to look at Remmy lounging on the couch. She gave me a pout. Oh, and she batted her lashes...

"OK, so what do you want to do?" I asked and closed my book. There was no way I could live through the begging.

"We cooould... We could go rent a movie!"

I rolled my eyes and leaned back in the black chair, amused. "Remmy, we're living with two aliens who have the largest movie collection I've ever seen, and you want to go and _rent _a movie?"

"We can buy chocolate and cookies!" she tempted.

I opened my mouth slightly, thinking about it. But in the end, it wasn't much to think about. "OK, I'm in! I'm just gonna go find a wallet to borrow some money."

Getting up on my feet, I headed for the Lair's kitchen. Remmy frowned and looked over the back of the couch when I passed.

"Can we really call it borrowing? It's not like we can pay them back."

I shrugged. "It's not like they don't have money to spare, with all those patents Megamind have. And it's only for a few months."

With a knowing grin, Remmy pointed out, "And it's not like Megamind doesn't have leather to spare too, huh?"

Confused I tilted my head. "Mind explaining that one?"

"I know you've '_borrowed_' a leather jacket."

_Åh faen._

Remmy's grin grew larger. Man, was she enjoying having me cornered.

"Not. A. _Word!" _I warned her, and turned to find the money.

I tip toed and got a hold on the wallet on the top of the refrigerator. A quick look told me it was Minion's. He probably wouldn't mind. I could rent a movie with fish in as well. Though the closest rental store was rather shabby, it did have an OK collection of animations. Wondering whether the very shabby store on the same street had fish food, I opened the wallet.

And totally froze.

Then I started to giggle.

"_Herregud, Minion. Du er en sær, sær fisk!"_

A metallic sound from the hall told me the owner of the wallet was on his way, and I quickly hid it behind my back. Entering the room, Minion only smiled and greeted me. "Hi, Miss Fire."

"H-hi..." I snorted, trying to keep in my laughter. He noticed my behaviour and stopped with his arm half way up to the cabinet with the fish food.

"Miss Fire, is anything wrong?"

"N-no!" I said, biting my lip.

He tilted his body inside the sphere and frowned. "Are you sure?"

"No..."

"What are you hiding behind your back?"

With a hand slightly shaking from keeping in my laugher, I held up the open wallet, showing him the pin-up picture of a certain red headed mermaid. There was a shocked silence, only ruined by the constant attempt to stop myself from bursting out into laughter. I could see the wheels in the fish's brain turn in such a speed I wouldn't have been surprised if smoke had come out.

Then an idea clicked in.

"I won't tell Sir you have his jacket if you don't tell anyone about this!"

My giggling suddenly stopped. _Faen, _did _everyone _know?

We stood still for a moment while I processed this.

"OK, it's a deal!" I said, the events around Remmy borrowing Megamind's boots still fresh in my mind. I quickly pulled out some money and threw him his wallet.

I can swear I heard him sigh in relief when I left.

* * *

**Ladies and Gentlemen- Minion has a thing for Ariel.**

**And I have a thing for leather jackets...**

**What, I'm only _borrowing _it!**

**And do you know what this was? CHAPTER NUMBER 30! **


	31. Chapter 31

"I'm happy for you. What are you doing now?"

"I'm robbing this place!"~

_Ed Bloom and Norther Winslow- Big Fish (my fave part of the movie)_

* * *

**A Big Fish and a Kicked Guppy**

"It's _Tim Burton _Night!"

Fire placed the huge pile of DVD's and Blue-rays on the coffee table next to the extreme amount of snacks before settling on the couch with her fellow teen and the space fish.

Megamind gave Remmy a dejected look. "I can't believe you've never seen a _Tim Burton_ movie."

"I saw _Alice in Wonderland_. And parts of _The Nightmare Before Christmas_."

Shaking his head, Megamind mumbled, "It should be a crime."

"But we'll fix that tonight!" Roxanne exclaimed, and placed herself on her beau's lap. "Three movies and scary high blood sugar levels."

"OK then." Remmy placed herself in such a way on the couch that she had her feet on Fire's thighs and her back against the hairy suit of her favourite minion. "Which movies are we watching?"

"Edward Scissorhands!"

"Sweeny Todd!"

"The Corpse Bride!"

With an exited grin, Minion cheered "Big Fish!" making his master groan.

"Minion, we've watched that movie a hundred times! You know the lines by heart!"

"But _Siiir_..." Tilting his body, opening up his eyes and slightly pouting, Minion set up the world's best (and only) Kicked Guppy Face.

"No!" Megamind tried to hide behind his laughing girlfriend's back. "No, not the face! Minion! Please!"

All three girls gave out an 'Aaaw!' when the eyes grew even shinier.

"Minion, come on, we've seen it…"

The pouting got worse.

"Minion..."

The lip slightly trembled.

And the blue alien cracked. "Fine! We'll watch _Big Fish!" _

"Yes!" Minion cheered and fist pumped.

Fire freed herself from Remmy's feet to go place the disk in the player.

"OK, guys. Find your popcorn! _Tim Burton_ Movie Night starts now!"

They all snuggled up under blankets with bowls of candy on their laps and smiles on their faces as the movie and adventure began:

"_There are some fish that cannot be caught. It's not that they are faster or stronger than other fish, they're just touched by something extra. Once such fish was The Beast, and by the time I was born he was already a legend…"_

* * *

**I LOVE Tim Burton! The details, the adventures, the insane characters! Remember when me and my friend went to see Sweeny Todd, and it was that song where he cut all those throats. Don't think I've ever heard my friend laugh that much XD But I was never really a fan of Edward Scissorhands. The Corpse Bride on the other hand is just plain awesome!**

**All credits to Remmy for comming up with the Kicked Guppy Face.**

**So, can you guess who suggested which movie?**


	32. Chapter 32

**Red meat is _not_ bad for you. Now blue-green meat, _that's_bad for you! ~Tommy Smothers**

* * *

**Glad to be a F****ish**

"Megamind! What have you got for me today?" Officer Thompson put down his paper and straightened up with a grin. Megamind placed three blue cubes on the reception desk.

"Two drug dealers and a guy who thought it was a good idea to rob a gun store with a letter opener."

Thompson shook his head. "You'd think they'd be wiser."

"All brawn and no brain," the hero agreed.

"Ah, yes..." Thompson leaned back in his chair with glassy eyes. "Now when _you _were the bad guy, things really were interesting. Well, it mostly ended the same way, but at least it was always a thrill to see your new inventions."

"Mmm..." With a hand on the counter, Megamind too let the memories carry him off. "Those were the days. But still; I don't miss them a bit."

"Really?"

"OK, so a bit. A tiny bit. A _very _tiny bit." Holding two fingers so close the space in between them was no bigger than a fly; he showed just the size of it.

"Well, if it was me who'd won a girl like Ritchi, I'd be pretty happy with my life too." Thompson sent a wink to a pretty afro-American female officer who passed. She rolled her eyes and kept walking. "There are quite a few nice girls around here too."

A short, chubby officer came up to the reception, carrying a mountain of files.

"'Here ar' 'e files," he mumbled, placed the files on the desk and then found a handkerchief in his pocket and dried his nose.

"Carl, I said you should go home!" Thompson said, and took the files. "You are sicker than a maniac with a chainsaw, a sheep and a sex toy!"

"'m fine. N'ing w- w- wr-"

They knew what was happening a second before the guy blew, still the sneeze came surprising. Especially when he managed to sneeze Megamind right in the face.

"_Eew!"_

"Goddamn, Carl! You're supposed to sneeze into your elbow! Here, Megamind," Thompson found a pack of handkerchiefs with alcohol and handed the grossed out blue alien one.

"S'ry," Carl mumbled.

Trying to get himself clean, Megamind decided that he wasn't quite enough of a good guy to say 'no problem'. Back in the days he'd de-hydrate the officer and find a dry place to keep him. Now he just threw the handkerchief in a bin and waved a good bye to Thompson, deciding that he wanted out of the station (and away from the sick officer) as quickly as possible.

"See you around, blue boy!" Thompson called after him. He gave his co-worker a glare. "Carl, have I ever told you how dumb you are?"

"'U gotta spe'k lo'wder, 'Ompson," the sick Carl mumbled. "My ears ar' ring'n."

* * *

With a groan, Megamind sat down in the seat of the invisible car. "Minion, I need to go back to the Lair and soak in some alcohol."

The fish frowned. He knew by experience that bathing in alcohol (in his case, vodka) wasn't a good idea. "May I ask why, Sir?"

"One of the officers sneezed on me. Can you imagine something that gross?" Megamind sighed and slid down in the seat. "What's next, Minion?"

"Well, Sir, first we're going to the library and pick up Miss Ritchi from her interview."

From the corner of his eyes, Minion could see his master lighten up like a Christmas tree, and smiled. As his guardian, knowing Megamind was truly happy made Minion happy as well.

"And then we're going to the Museum of Technology."

"Why? Are we stealing some in – oh right, we don't do that anymore." There once was a time where the Museum of Technology had been a great place to look for parts and equipment for his inventions. Now they had to get that stuff legally.

"To pick up the girls, Sir."

The Christmas tree fainted somewhat, but Minion kept smiling. He knew that the blue alien didn't _really _dislike the girls. It was a bit of acting and over dramatizing in there too. And the two teens weren't _that _bad. A bit straight forward, somewhat weird, but then again; they were _all_ a bit weird in the Lair.

"Why are the girls at the Museum?"

"Field trip, Sir! I thought that since they are missing school while being here they should at least get some education. And it would be a good idea for them to learn some more about technology since they are living with us."

Nodding, Megamind agreed. "We can't have them failing because they're here." Then, with a smirk, he added, "And by sending them on field trips we can get some peace once in a while."

'_Whatever floats Sir's boat.'_

Minion stopped the car in front of the Metro City Library, and his master jumped a second before it stood fully still.

"Roxanne!"

From the top of the stairs, the brunette came walking down, happy to be greeted with so much glee.

"Hi there, Megs," she said when she came down.

Before he had the time to stop her, Roxanne had kissed his cheek. She gave him a confused look when he quickly backed off. That was a new one!

"Is something wrong?"

"A guy down at the station sneezed on me; I don't want you to catch whatever he had!"

"Eew!" Roxanne whined and quickly found a little bottle of cleaning alcohol in her purse, pouring some of it in her hand before trying to wash off her lips with it. "That's disgusting!"

"Tell me about it," Megamind sighed and opened the back door for his lady, who neatly slipped in.

"Aren't you afraid you'll get sick?"

"Dearest, I've got an excellent immune system. I'll be fine."

"You did get the stomach flu last year, Sir," Minion reminded and got the car started again. A glare was sent him from the passenger seat, making the once upon a damsel giggle. They were still themselves.

* * *

The two teens were leaning against the pillars outside the Museum, looking a tad bored with their eyes half closed.

"Minion, slow down! Drive slowly!"

The fish did as he was told, but sceptically. He'd seen that spark of mischief in the emerald eyes before.

"Sir, what are you planning?"

"Don't be such a pill, Minion, just do as I say."

Roxanne and Minion shared a look as Megamind pressed his face against the window.

Just as they were right in front of the two oblivious teenagers, he pressed a gloved finger against his blue lips, telling the other two to be quiet.

Before suddenly opening the door.

"_BO!"_

"_Aaahh!"_

Both teens jumped, Fire actually lost her connection with the ground and landed hard on the tiled stairs.

"Megs!" Remmy cried. "Don't do that!"

But the alien didn't care; he was already folded double with his hands over his stomach, laughing.

"You should have seen your faces!"

"Ha ha, very funny," Remmy growled. "You should have seen your face when you found the spiders in your underwear drawer."

With a confused look, Megamind stopped his laughing.

"What?"

"Oh wait, we haven't done that. _Yet!"_

"Come on, it was only a joke," he tried, hoping the threat wouldn't be fulfilled. He'd had one on his eye and he'd prefer to keep it with that. "It wasn't any harm in – wait! Is that my jacket?"

Fire jumped up from her sitting position, her eyes everywhere except on him while grinning nervously.

"What? Your jacket? No, can't be. I bought this. Not yours. At all!"

"It does looks like the larger one I use during winter. The one I can have a sweater under."

"Can't be!"

Finding this a good time to step in, Minion said, "Um, Sir. I did borrow Miss Fire some money the other day..." It wasn't like he was lying!

He was only telling half of the truth.

"Yes! And I bought this! Yeah!"

"OK then..." Yet Megamind did notice how the two sent each other a look of agreement. Oh, that was so _his _jacket and they all knew it. But it wasn't like he needed it now anyway. Though it would have been fun to know just what kind of agreement the two had come up with.

The girls slipped into the back seat next to Roxanne and closed the door.

"Um, Megs?" Remmy said. "You've got a little... something... by your ear..."

"What?" Megamind touched the spot, feeling something sticky fasten to his glove. There was only need for one quick look before deciding what it was.

"Eeew! That goddamn officer!"

While Megamind searched through the glove compartment for something to wipe the snot off his glove, the teens turned to Roxanne.

"Did we miss something?" Remmy asked.

"An officer sneezed on him.

"_Eeew!" _the teens cried and pressed their backs against the seats, trying to increase the distance between themselves and the alien in the front seat as if he was infected.

"Hey! I'm not poisonous!"

Laying her fingers in a cross, Fire glared at him. _"Vik fra meg! __Ei har itte tenkt å bli smitta!"_

With a sigh, Megamind pressed a button on his watch, and from the translator in her ear, the English version came. _"Yield from me! I'm not planning on getting infected!"_

The girl groaned and let her hands fall. "I hate that remote. I doubt it's legal! One day I'll crush that watch under my boot."

"You're not going to get infected. I've sterilised-"

Both girls started an immature giggling before he finished his sentence. With another groan, Megamind fell back in his seat.

"Minion, just get us home."

"Straight away, Sir."

To the giggling teens in the back seat, he cried, "And no one is going to get infected!"

* * *

"Liar," Remmy growled, before falling into yet another coughing fit.

"I 'ate been' 'ick," it came from the duvet. The only thing telling it was Fire under it was the stack of hair sticking up over it.

Minion had decided that it was for the best to have all his patients in one room. So he had placed his master in the chair, the teens each their way on the couch and Roxanne had been offered the best spot: a thick mattress on the floor. They had insisted that she'd stay in the Lair where she could be taken care of.

Sniffing and reaching for the box of paper handkerchiefs, Roxanne found it empty. "Damn."

More coughing came from Remmy, causing Megamind to whimper and hold his head in his hands.

"Please, keep quiet. It feels like someone placed a bomb in my brain."

"Brain ex'osion," Fire giggled around a stuffed nose. "And y'u'd de'erve it! We all know 'ose fault 'his is." She peeked up under the duvet to glare at him.

"It wasn't my fault!" Megamind whined, only to make the pain flush through his head again.

"Here comes the medicine!" In came a grinning Minion, carrying a plate filled with all things needed for his four patients.

"Miss Ritchi; a new box of handkerchiefs."

"Thank you so much, Minion!"

"Sir; an aspirin and a glass of water!"

"You fantastic fish."

"Miss Fire; nose spray."

"_Tusen takk, Minion!"_

"And to Miss Remmy; a tablet with colostrums."

"Thank you, Minion."

As all four did what they found best to cure their cold, Minion couldn't help but smile.

Oh, he was _so _glad he was a fish!

* * *

**Goddamn lucky Minion. Didn't get sick... Well, at least we had him to pamper us ^^**

**All thanks to MegaPotterHead for comming up with the idea. I HOPE YOU'RE FEELING BETTER, MEGA!**

**This was NOT easy to write. There's so much going on with me these days, my brain's shutting down. I hope you still found some fun in this! **

**And I will _get back to you! *backing away while hiding my face behind a cape*_**


	33. Chapter 33

**When I thought that I fought this war alone  
You were there by my side on the frontline  
When I thought that I fought without a cause  
You gave me a reason to try**

**From Poets of Fall's 'War'**

**(Thanks for the link, Dinny)  
**

* * *

**Out of reach**

We stared at the device Roxanne had forgotten on the kitchen table.

Unaware of its importance.

Waiting for someone to reach for it.

"Do you want to go first?" I asked, but it was more like a whisper.

Remmy took a deep breath. "OK. Here goes nothing."

She reached for the cell, pressed a number and held it to her ear, hidden behind the light brown curls.

We waited.

I couldn't take my eyes off her; I wanted to see her reaction the moment it came. Hoping she'd smile, laugh and maybe even talk.

But she didn't.

Instead she lay the cell back down on the table, closer to me than its primary position.

"You try."

Biting my lip, I picked it up. The plastic was still warm from Remmy's hands, reminding me that there would still be someone here when I hang up.

"_Her går ingenting."_

First I pressed +47, then eight more numbers.

A beep.

Another beep.

Then:

"_Du er kommet til et nummer som ikke er i bruk."_

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing the tears to stay inside.

"_Du er kommet til et nummer som ikke er i bruk."_

Biting my lip again, I moved the phone away from my ear.

"_Du er kommet til et nummer som ikke er i bruk."_

Then pressed the button that hung up.

"Did it work?"

I simply placed the phone on the table.

"What was the message?"

Pushing the lightning shaped button on the translator in my ear, I repeated the message. For me, it sounded Norwegian, but I knew Remmy had heard it in English.

"_You have reached a number that is not in use."_

She nodded. "Same here."

In silence we sat, digesting the result of our experiment.

"Ti-" The word got stuck in my throat, and I had to cough before trying again. "Time most likely is standing still. Of course we couldn't reach them. At least not through Roxanne's phone."

But my own words only made a tear run down my cheek and neck, before disappearing into my hoodie.

"What's wrong?"

Remmy lifted her head and I turned in my chair, both startled by the sudden appearance.

"Minion," the youngest of us whimpered.

The brown eyes shifted from Remmy, to me and then to the phone.

"Have you been calling someone?"

We sat still for a moment, before, as on a signal, both of us got up from our chairs and threw our arms around the robot body. I buried my face into the fur on his shoulder, letting the tears hide between the strands of hair. Without hesitation, strong, yet gently, arms hugged us closer.

He got it.

* * *

**Come on, you'd be sad too if your tried to call home and found out you couldn't!**

**Based on some old messages between Remmy and me where we talked about stealing Megs phone to call home to out family.**

**Dindella sent me that song just half an hour ago. I love it already!**


	34. Chapter 34

**Påtalemyndighetene mener de har sikre bevis mot de hovedtiltalte i overgrepssaken i Alvdal. To foreldrepar er tiltalt for å stå bak særdeles grove voldtekter mot barna sine. I morgen starter den fire uker lange rettssaken.**

**NRK- 1st of January, 2011. **

* * *

*******, a****re you doing OK?**

With my eyes closed and one leg over the other, I sang to the song from my MP3:

_Oh, waves of time  
Seem to wash away_

One of my feet, the one in the air, moved with the beat. The other's heel was digging into the leather couch I was lying on.

_The scenes of our crimes  
For you this never ends  
_

Memories flashed through my mind._  
_

_Can you stay strong?  
Can you go on?  
Kristy, are you doing okay?_

In my mind, I changed the name to something more familiar._  
_

_A rose that won't bloom  
Winter's kept you_

Straight hair, coloured darker underneath._  
_

_Don't waste your whole life trying  
To get back what was taken away_

"Pretty lyrics." My eyes opened in surprise, and I saw Roxanne standing in front of the couch, looking at me. "What song is it?"

I closed my eyes again. "It's _Kristy, are you doing OK? _by The Offspring."

The couch moved as Roxanne sat down by my feet. "What's it about?"

Even though the thoughts in my mind were dark, I felt the corners of my lip move. Roxanne _was _curious.

"It's about a girl the lead singer knew in school. She was abused by her father."

The silence around the woman was just as easy to feel as the movement when she'd sat down.

"That's strong lyrics."

"Yeah. I found this song not long ago. It's become one of my favourites." I opened an eye, before closing it again, just to check she was still listening patiently. "I went to class with a girl like Kristy."

"You mean-"

"Turns out we had a whole paedophile environment in my village. We didn't even know until last year, seven years after she was taken by child services."

My eyes kept closed. I didn't really want to look at her.

"Didn't they know?"

"Don't think so. I think they came for her because her parents did drugs. So for seven years, those paedophiles have just walked among us, without anyone knowing it."

"That's awful."

"Yeah."

We sat for a moment, just thinking about it. Then I opened my eyes.

Roxanne's brows were tangled and I could see the strong woman wanted to do something. Maybe it was a trademark with reporters? That they always wanted to help, to give the mute a voice?

I sat up and removed a plug from my ear, offering it to her. Without saying anything, she took it and placed it in her own. Moving closer together so that the plugs wouldn't be ripped out of our ears, I pressed play. And it began to play again, and I replaced the name 'Kristy' with another.

_Though the marks on your dress  
Had been neatly repressed  
I knew that something was wrong  
And I should have spoke out  
And I'm so sorry now  
I didn't know  
'Cause we were so young_

_Oh, clouds of time_  
_Seem to rain on_  
_Innocence left behind_  
_And it never goes away_

* * *

**Searching for a quote, I found a picture taken of the girl from behind.**

**I recognized her right away. **

**This has become one of the biggest cases of it's kind in Norway. Therefor, I'm not afraid to write about it here. It's well know already.**

**Every time I hear that song I think of her.**

**Promise the next chapter will be lighter!**

**The quote is from the news station NRK about the case.**

**The case is still not closed...**


	35. Chapter 35

"Any authentic work of art must start an argument between the artist and his audience."~Rebecca West

* * *

**All Eight Settings**

"Here you go!"

I looked up from my drawings and saw the De-Gun pointed right at me, making my eyes cross as I tried to focus on it.

"Um... Megs, I know Remmy and I can be a bit annoying, but don't you think you're taking this a tad too far?"

Megamind rolled his green eyes. "I'm not aiming at you, Fire. Here, it's your De-Gun."

Blinking, I took the weapon he was offering me. "Seriously?"

"I did say I was going to get you De-Guns, didn't I?" He smiled. "What do you think?"

Holding and aiming, I tried it in my hands. It felt foreign; holding a gun wasn't my first priority. I eyed it, getting familiar with the design. It wasn't anything near as glorious as the original, even though the main design was the same. This one missed the old style filigree, replacing it with golden flames.

"Incredible details," I praised, a bit embarrassed about getting such a gift. Usually I'd gone on and on about telling people I didn't need anything. Whenever someone offered me something, I'd pretend not to care so that they wouldn't feel pressured to give it to please me, before going into complete happiness when they did anyway.

"Well, I _am _incredible! Remmy said something about a wolf, so..." Still grinning, he held up another gun, this one with one wolf on either side.

Only smiling, I let him soak in his own glory. After all, he did deserve it.

"Yeah, apparently it's her totem." But with a frown, I noticed something. "It's only got two settings. De-hydration and De-coupage."

He arched an eyebrow. "You didn't really think I'd give you De-ath ray and De-stroy after you shot Minion, did you?"

I sighed. "No, guess not."

"_What?" _

As Remmy, once again, suddenly popped up from behind the couch, I jumped and accidentally pressed the trigger of the gun making the curtain of the idea area to disappear in a flash of blue.

"Remmy! Don't scare me like that!"

"We don't get all eight settings?" the Aussie whined.

"Skittles, it's OK. You weren't planning on destroying people on the street, were you?" I tried, but she still seemed completely horrified.

"We don't get De-compress, De-bilitate, De-ath ray, De-stroy, De-regulate or De-moralize?"

With a smile, I had to ask. "What is the deal about all of those settings. De-moralize for instance?"

Megamind's serious expression changed to a smirk. "Let's just say there were a lot of embarrassing bullies in s_hool_. And, no, you won't get the other settings."

"You don't trust us?"

His look told the truth. He _didn't _trust us.

"I'm _so _gonna make you put in the other settings!"

"Skittles, really, what are you planning to use the other settings for anyway?" I asked. To be honest, I was happy _not_ to have the De-ath Ray and De-stroy. Honestly, I wouldn't feel comfortable about carrying a real mortal weapon. Heck, I was scared whenever I drove a car!

"Otherwise it's not _real, _you know! Not _authentic!_"

"O...K..."

With an eye roll over my lack of disappointment, Remmy turned on her heel. "I'm so gonna get the last settings, and you both know it!" she declared, walking away. With a wave of her arm, she called back, "Ciao, ciao, all!"

Megamind and I shared a look. Oh, this wasn't good. As I opened my mouth to speak, Remmy was suddenly back again, grabbing the De-Gun in Megamind's hands.

"Almost forgot this," she grinned, and gave him a peck on the cheek. "Thanks Megs." And then she was gone again.

We both blinked, trying to figure out what had just happened.

"How does she do that?"

"Totally cartoon style movements. Possibly the side effects of being in a 3D world. Maybe she's got secret tunnels or super speed or something," I mused. Then I glanced at him and smirked. "You're aware that you're in for _so _much trouble now, right?"

* * *

***Hands over bunny* Here Remmy, you can have this one if you want to! It's eating my Pink Post-it notes. (Some have plot bunnies, I have post-it notes all over my insides)**

**Megamind, you're in for some trouble!**

**Snigger...**

**Decompress... snigger...**


	36. Chapter 36

**How lucky we are that we can reach our genitals instead of that spot on our back that itches~ _Flash Rosenberg_**

* * *

**Two can play ****this game**

"What does your junk look like?"

Megamind sighed, putting down his pencil to look at the girl who'd popped her head up over the tilted desk.

"Remmy, I'm no- Wait. Fire? But..." Looking around, he half expected to see the Australian somewhere. But no, this time it was Fire who'd popped the unnecessary question out of thin air. "Isn't it usually Remmy who does this?"

Fire shrugged and leaned her arms against the top of the desk. "Guess I've been affected by her. You can only live with someone for so long before you adopt some qualities."

"Asking private questions is a quality?" Megamind leaned back in his chair with a raised eyebrow.

"Maybe? So, what does it look like?"

With a sigh he closed his eyes. Teenagers could be really annoying from time to time. At least, when they didn't care about limits. Limits normal people should know.

Wait.

Was he a normal person?

An idea enlightened a spark in his amazing mind. Two could play this game.

With a smirk and his index fingers pressed against each other, he asked "So, Fire, how often do you masturbate?"

Her eyes popped and her jaw dropped, confusion and surprise painted all over her. "Come again?"

"You heard me."

With a series of shocked blinks and shifting eyes from Fire, he knew he'd won this one. "I get the hint!" Fire pointed to nowhere particular. "I'm just gonna... go..."

And with that she was gone.

Megamind chuckled and leaned over his designs again. Some days, the girls' questions could be rather amusing.

Especially if he'd gotten some new 'qualities'.

* * *

**Yeah, not gonna answer that one...**

**Oh no he DIDN'T!**

**The guys in my class at Youth School (grade 8 to 10) used to ask all the girls if they masturbated... What the H are you supposed to answer to that? If you said yes, they'd bug you about it. If you said no, you were weird. But if a girl asked a boy, he'd say 'Du'uh. Of course!' and that was it. Because we all know guys do it, they don't care to hide that fact.**

**But now, three years late, I've come up with a reply!**

**"Ever seen your Mom's breasts?"**

**Glad I made you laugh, Twoie ;)**


	37. Chapter 37

**Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. ~Roger Caras  
**

* * *

**Lack of weirdness**

"Something isn't right."

Megamind turned to look at me. "What isn't right?"

"Something..." I frowned, and tried to work out what was wrong.

The three of us; me, Megamind and Minion were working on a new device. One which I had no idea what it was going to do. I was just there to help and get some more training in welding. Apparently, I was a little bit more than useless and could be at help. That, or Minion had convinced Megamind that letting me in on these things would be a good way to prevent unnecessary boredom.

"Miss Fire's right. There is something unusual," Minion mused, and stopped working.

We all straightened up and looked around, trying to point out just exactly what was wrong.

It was as if someone had removed a certain thing from a room; a thing you wouldn't see what was gone at first, but just know something was wrong with the picture.

Something very important.

Some_one_ very important.

"Is it just me, or is there a certain lack of weirdness tonight?" Megamind asked.

Nodding, I understood what was wrong. "Where's Remmy?"

Remmy would come and go, a suddenly pop up out of nowhere. Whenever she wasn't around, I only assumed she was stalking Minion! But... Minion was here...

"When did you last see her?" the blue alien asked me.

I shrugged. "A few hours ago. Minion?"

"Same."

So Megamind laid down his tools and walked off.

"Where are you going?"

Turning again, he raised an eyebrow. "To look for her, of course!" And then he was gone.

I glanced at Minion with a smile. "Does he look for her because he's afraid she'll ruin something or because he's actually caring for us?"

The fish grinned. "A bit of both."

* * *

Remmy wasn't in the observatory. She wasn't in the basement. She wasn't in the kitchen (all I found there was the cookie jar). And she wasn't in the bathroom. The three of us met up in the hall, scratching our heads (and sphere).

"Where is she?" I wondered, starting to worry. Instinct wanted me to protect my friends, like I was a part of a pack, and not being able to find her was beginning to scare me!

"I don't kn-" Megamind began, but stopped himself half way through.

"What, Sir?"

Pointing at something behind us, he made us turn. And we saw the door to the storage room standing slightly open.

Of course! How come we hadn't looked there?

But what was weird was a weak, soft light emerging from the room. We silently walked over to the door and peeked in. Being met with what had to be the cutest picture I'd ever seen.

"_Så søtt!"_

There was Remmy, fast asleep, with a little Brainbot glowing on her chest. It was rising and falling with the sleepy rhythm of her breathing. Careful not to wake her up, we closed the door.

And headed back to our project, smiling over the sweet sight we'd just seen.

* * *

**Remmy wrote a new chapter for 'Living in 3D'. I've already read it three times because it was so incredibly cute! She also wished for a drawing of her and the Brainbot. Go to my DevArt account and take a look ^^ **


	38. Chapter 38

§ 1. Kongeriket Norge er et frit, uafhængigt og udeleligt Rige. Dets Regjeringsform er indskrænket og arvelig-monarkisk. ~From the Norwegian Constitution of 1814

The kingdom of Norway is a free, independent and unsepparately empire. It's form of government is restricted and hereditary monarchic.

* * *

**Ja, Vi Elsker**

So wonderful.

Silence.

Soft bed sheets.

Sleep dragging him down into welcomed darkness.

After patrolling all night, it was wonderful just to slip into bed. He would have driven home with Minion sooner, if it weren't for the riots that had been going on. Some new group of 'villains' were trying to make their mark, letting Megamind know they were there. Amateurs.

OK, so he'd had his hands filled with burglaries, car alarms and a whole runaway zoo. Still, he'd gone through worse. But after four nights of this, his body was pretty exhausted by not getting enough sleep. No matter what some people seemed to think, he _did_ need 7 to 8 hours sleep every night to be on his best.

Now it was just going to be absolutely divine to shut his tired eyes and fall as-

'_Hvor hen du går i li og fjell,  
en vinterdag, en sommerkveld  
ved fjord og fossevell!_

_fra eng og mo med furutrær  
fra havets bryn med fiskevær  
og til de hvite skjær'_

The rock music blasted through walls, through the bedroom door and straight into his ears! What on earth? Who was playing rock at – he glanced at his watch – 8 in the morning? Wow, had he been out on patrol _that_ long?_  
_

'_møter du landet i trefarvet drakt,  
svøpt i et gjennskinn av flaggets farveprakt._

_Se, en hvitstammet bjerk oppi heien  
rammer stripen med blåklokker inn  
mot den rødmalte stuen ved veien;  
det er flagget som vaier i vind!_

OK, there was _no_ way he'd be able to sleep through this. With tired movements, Megamind got out of bed and slipped on his bat slippers._  
_

'_Ja, så hvit som det hvite er sneen,  
og det røde har kveldsolen fått  
og det blå gav sin farge til breen,  
det er Norge i rødt, hvitt og blått.'_

Out in the hall he tiredly bumped into a well-known furry gorilla suit.

Minion blinked. "Sir?"

"Minion?"

"Sir, I was certain it was you who-"

Megamind shook his head. "It's not me, I'm too tired." He frowned and listened. "And that's _not _one of my songs."

They listened, trying to hear if the song was familiar.

'_En vårdag i en solskinnsstund  
på benken i Studenterlund  
der sitter han og hun,  
to unge nyutsprungne russ,  
to ganske nylig tente bluss,  
i tyve grader pluss.  
Hun er som en gryende forsommerdag  
som farves av gjennskinnet fra det norske flagg.  
Ja, så hvit som det hvite er kjolen,  
og så rødt som det rø' hennes kinn,  
hennes øyne er blå som fiolen,  
hun er flagget som vaier i vind.  
Han har freidig og hvitlugget panne,  
og en lue i rødt har han fått.  
Med en lyseblå tiltro til landet  
står vår ungdom i rødt, hvitt og blått.'_

"What's going on?" A sleepy Remmy came out of the door to the storage room she and Fire had been sleeping in for the past two months. "Fire and I were up late watching movies; I wanted to sleep in!"

"Well, there's only one way to find out," Megamind decided, and made his way against the source of the unfamiliar rock with the others right behind him.

As they came closer and closer to the main room the sound became louder, but not uncomfortable. In the end, they came out at the end of the open room, seeing who had decided to play music in the morning.

'_De kjempet både hun og han!  
Nå lyser seierens baunebrann  
utover Norges land.  
Mot himlen stiger flagg ved flagg  
som tusen gledesbål i dag  
for alle vunne slag.'_

There Fire was, dressed in blue jeans, a white T-shirt and a red hoodie. She was dancing along with the song, one Brainbot in each hand, screaming her lungs out as she tried to sing as loud as the song.

'_Det knitrer som før over hytte og slott  
et flammende merke i rødt og hvitt og blått.  
Som et regnbuens tegn over skyen  
skal det evig i fremtiden stå.  
Se, det glitrer på ny over byen  
i det røde og hvite og blå.'_

With great enthusiasm and closed eyes, Fire raised a fist in the air.

'_La det runge fra gaten og torget  
over landet som nordmenn har fått:'_

Before jumping up on the great leather chair with one foot on the armrest and a fist over her heart.

'_Du er vårt, du er vårt, gamle Norge!  
Vi vil kle deg i rødt, hvitt og blått!'_

The song stopped, leaving the Lair in comfortable silence. Megamind dug a finger into his ear to get out some pressure that had formed there.

"Fire, not that I don't love to play music out loud, but I don't really approve of you playing Norwegian rock in the morning before anyone has even had the chance to _sleep!_"

She opened her eyes and grinned, overlooking the sleepy hero's complaining.

"_God søttende mai!" _

All three stood still, staring at the smiling girl on the chair. The Brainbots gave out a couple of 'bow's and flew away from the awkward situation. Megamind looked at Minion and Remmy, but they both shrugged, not knowing what was going on. So since he was both desperate for sleep, didn't find anything more to pick on and no one seemed to be able to explain the teenager's weird behaviour, he decided just to get this over with.

"Well, I'm going back to bed," Megamind yawned, turned and walked off, followed by the sleepy fish and teenager. No-one was really awake enough to find out what had gotten into Fire today.

So no-one noticed how her face fell when they left.

* * *

"What are you making?" Remmy asked, and peeked over Fire's shoulder. It was 11 in the morning, and even though they would have liked to sleep in even later, it wasn't easy to do after the sudden awakening.

"Norwegian waffles!" Fire grinned, opening the waffle iron and removing yet another plate. Though they didn't look like the common waffles; instead, like five heart shaped pieces stuck together in one, round waffle.

"Grand shape!"

"I found the iron in a shop the other day! I never thought I'd find a Norwegian waffle iron here! Back home we don't eat them for breakfast, but I thought, 'what the hell'."

Megamind and Minion, still puffed eyed after too little sleep, also leaned in to look.

Megamind eyed the stack on the oven plate. "They look good."

"They _are!_ You can eat them with jam, sour cream, sugar or cheese!"

Tilting his body, Minion asked in interest, "Cheese?"

"Yes!" But her face fell somewhat and she pouted. "But I couldn't find goat cheese in the stores here in the neighbourhood. They're way too shabby."

With a shrug, Megamind sniffed in the smell. "Jam sounds good! Maybe-" But he was interrupted by a beep from his watch. He looked at his and groaned.

"What is it, Sir?"

"Those amateurs again. They've managed to set fire at a bunch of vans in the middle of the highway. We have to go; there's an explosion warning."

Fire tried to hide the disappointment, but it wasn't easy. "You're leaving?"

"Sorry, Miss Fire, but we have to. We'll taste your waffles some other time. You and Remmy can eat them while they're still hot." And with that, the heroes had to go out to do some hero work.

"Remember!" Remmy called after them, "Cool guys don't look at explosions!" Then she looked over at her friend with the eyebrows tangled in a sad frown. "I want to taste your waffles, Fire," she declared with a smile.

Fire lightened up and grinned. "I'll find the jam!"

* * *

Two even more tired aliens drove back home. Both smelled a lot like gasoline and ash.

"Amateurs. What kind of presentation was this?" Megamind mumbled. Lack of sleep was darkening his mood, making it blacker than a black mamba. "Breaking into stores, setting vans alight. They didn't even let out the carnivores when they released the zoo animals!"

"The exploding vans were a bit cool," Minion mumbled and drove the car straight into the brick wall with the secret entrance. A flash of blue surrounded them before they entered the Lair.

Megamind huffed. His body was exhausted, but his brain wasn't sleepy anymore. It was too late to sleep now. Instead he could wish for an early evening.

As they stepped out of the car, they were once again met with music. This time a typical party song with a techno undertone. Not only that, but on those two hours they'd been out, the Lair had been... redecorated?

Vases with birch branches stood in the corners, together with homemade drawn flags in red, white and blue. It might have looked pretty if it didn't clash completely with the style of the Lair.

And maybe if it had been _real _flags instead of paper drawn on with crayons.

"Someone's been busy," Minion mused, but his master groaned.

"What's gotten into her today?" Glancing up at the fish, he asked a question surrounding a topic he usually preferred not to go into. "Is it that time again?"

The men had decided to write down the... um... _lady times_ of the three women in their lives on a calendar, just to be prepared for the worst. Minion tapped the glass of his sphere like he was tapping his chin. "Maybe. I think it fits."

"Great. A hormonal, nationalistic teen."

Just then, said teen passed, carrying another vase with branches and self made flags, singing with the song.

'_Shining like a pearl, we're ready for the world_

_School ends tonight, la perla is forever_

_Meet the girls of Norway_

_They party like the rock stars on replay_

_They're gonna set the world in motion_

_For this smashing graduation_

_Meet the girls of Norway_

_They party like the rock stars on replay_

_They're gonna set the world in motion_

_Like a pearl in the ocean'_

"Fire," Megamind said and got her attention.

"Yes?"

With a gesture towards the boom box on the floor at the couch, he decided, "I think I preferred it when you played rock!"

"Oh yeah, I know. I don't usually like that 'boom boom' music either," she agreed, and moved her fingers at the word of 'boom boom'. "But this song has kind of grown on me. I like the lyrics. They're much better than usual!"

"Um, Miss Fire. It seems you've been very busy while we were gone."

With an embarrassed smile, Fire shifted the weight from one foot to the other. "It's tradition. Remmy has been helping me find birches. I don't like to take all the branches from the same tree. I kind of feel sorry for them. Oh!" She lightened up with as she remembered something. "Would you like to come with me-"

"I've got some plans," the cranky, overly-tired alien interrupted and walked past her.

"What plans?"

"I'm going to work on that portal!"

Watching his back as he walked towards the other end of the room, Fire's shoulders sank, and her eyes lost some of their glow. "He's in an unusually bad mood."

Minion looked at her, taking in the fallen apart attitude. "Sir's just had too little sleep the past few days. It'll pass."

"Mm..."

Bumping her shoulder (she was just a little bit shorter than him), he gave Fire an assuring smile. "We can do whatever you have planned a little later. And then we can taste those waffles of yours. But now, I should go and help Sir."

Fire sighed, but put on a fake smile. "Sure. I'll just go... Place this somewhere..." And with that she walked off to this 'somewhere' with the decoration.

* * *

After an hour of working and several mugs of coffee, Megamind did feel a little better. A little bit. Minion and he were working on the portal, watching as it slowly became whole. Fastening a bolt with a socket wrench, he didn't notice the girl standing behind him.

"How's it going?"

With a startled cry he spun, standing face to face with Fire.

"Has Remmy taught you to sneak up on people or something?"

She rolled her eyes. "No. And really, I have no idea how she does that. I just wanted to see how you were doing with the portal. I brought coffee!" With that Fire lifted up two mugs of coffee, and Megamind felt his mood rise a bit more, before he looked up and down the portal.

"I think we might be half through! It's not much more that needs to be done."

"Oh."

Glancing over at her, he saw a weird expression flash over her face. But it didn't last long enough for him to read it. Instead he looked over at Minion to see if the fish had got it, but he seemed deep in thoughts.

"So..." Fire said and took a step forward. "I was thinking-" But before she had the time to finish the sentence, an unaware foot stepped on a wrench, causing her to lose balance. And to lose the grip on the coffee mugs.

Which resulted in some of the hot liquid ending up on Megamind's thigh! He cried out and held his hands protecting over the spot where the coffee was slowly running through the spandex, making connection with the blue skin underneath.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" Fire cried and got back up on her feet. "I'm so very, very sorry! _Beklager!"_

Minion took action. They hadn't even noticed he'd gone before he came back with an ice bag, which Megamind took from him and held it against the burned thigh.

"What the- Goddamn!" That seemed to be the 'worst' curse he could come with.

"I'm so sorry! All I wanted was to ask if you-"

"Fire! I'm tired and exhausted and _not _in the mood for more of your hormonal nationalism! Can you just please keep down this Norway obsession!" he cried as the days of too little sleep took over his mood.

For a second the girl seemed shocked and hurt, before she turned angry. "I was only going to ask if you needed any _help, _but if you are so sick and tired of me and my country, I'll just leave you alone then; shall I _blåbær hue_?"

Turning on her heel, she walked with hard steps over to where the elevator up to the fake observatory was. And even though she had her back against them, Minion and Megamind could see she was shaking in anger. The elevator brought the teen up and out of sight, leaving them to just stare at the place in the ceiling where she'd disappeared.

A flush of guilt ran through Megamind and he bit his lip. Maybe he'd gone a bit too far?

"You shouldn't have done that."

Once again they were startled by a teen, this time Remmy. She had her arms crossed and was frowning down at the alien on the floor.

"What?"

"I said you shouldn't have done that! You hurt her feelings!"

Looking to Minion for support, he gave it by nodding his body. "You _were_ a bit tough on her, Sir. Clearly there was something important today she wanted us to participate in."

"Yes!" Remmy turned back down to Megamind. "This is a special day to her. She told me when we were eating those heart waffles. The seventeenth of May is Norway's _national day! _And since she's a senior this year, she was supposed to be in a huge celebration this month. Fire has a bad case of _homesickness _today!"

His lips formed to a surprised 'O'. That explained it.

"So that explains the thing with the flags and the music?" Minion asked.

Remmy nodded. "She's been looking forward to this senior celebration for years."

Staring at the ice bag, Megamind sighed. If only he'd asked this morning...

A metallic hand bumped his shoulder. "Sir, maybe you should go up and talk to Miss Fire?"

He looked up in the brown eyes of his minion, knowing that he was probably right. So with another sigh, he got to his feet, not caring that the ice bag fell to the floor. With a knot of guilt, he walked over to the still lifted elevator, pressing a button to bring it back down.

Oh, he felt stupid.

* * *

Fire wasn't in the observatory. Looking around, he couldn't see any sign of her. At least not until he noticed the dome was open.

"Fire?" Megamind asked, and popped his head out. No one answered, but he could once again hear music. The volume was low, but he was still able to hear the song.

'_Vi gir alt_

_Alt for Norge_

_Ofrer alt_

_Om vi må_

_Vi er Røde, Hvite, Blå_

_Hele kampen ut skal vi stå på_

_For Norge_

_Vårt fedreland'_

"Fire?" he asked again while climbing down from the observatory through the scaffolds and onto the roof to follow the sound.

'_Lojaliteten er total_

_Vi sloss med høy moral_

_For Norge'_

In the end he found her at the edge of the roof, standing there with her MP3 playing at full volume, moving from side to side with the music.

'_Vi gir alt_

_Alt for Norge_

_Ofrer alt_

_Om vi må__'_

Raising a hand, she waved a bottle while singing with the song. With a frown, he noticed three more bottles on the roof next to her.

'_Vi er Røde, Hvite, Blå_

_Hele kampen ut skal vi stå på_

_For Norge_

_Vårt fedreland.'_

Then it went over to an English version, but Fire kept singing anyway, giving it all even though it didn't exactly sound like an angel choir.

'_One for all_

_All for Norway_

_So come on_

_It's time to play_

_Dressed in_

_Red, white and blue_

_To the very end we'll see it through_

_For Norway_

_In every Way'_

By the time he'd reached her, the song was ending, and Fire lowered her bottle to take a deep sip of it.

"Where did you get that?"

She turned her head in surprise before looking away again. Sitting down on the edge with her feet in the air, she explained "I borrowed a holowatch and one of your old fake ID's from when you were evil."

Damn, he knew he should have hidden those better.

"Are you drunk?"

Fire looked somewhere between surprised and angry. "No! I've only been here for three minutes! This isn't that strong! And I'm not an alcoholic!"

"Ah, OK. May I have one?" he asked, and sat down next to her

Now she looked only surprised, but she did hand him a bottle.

"_Don't_ think I'll be drinking with_ you!"_

"I'm not going to drink it," Megamind said. Instead he held the cool bottle against the coffee stain on his thigh. "That's much better," he sighed.

A silence passed between them, leaving them with only their thoughts. Megamind glanced over at the girl. Had he really hurt her deeply? "Fire?"

"Mm," she hummed and took another sip.

"Remmy said this was supposed to be a very special day for you. Mind telling me what it's about?"

It seemed she was thinking about it, chewing on her cheek. Then she sighed.

"It's Norway's Constitution day." With a look over at him to see if he really was interested, she continued, "And our national day. There's a parade, games, fun, ice cream, hot dogs..."

"_Iced cream_?" Megamind grinned at the thought, and Fire couldn't hold in the giggle by the mispronouncing.

"Yes, _iced_ cream. And cake! And..." The smile fainted and she focused on her bottle again. "And family..."

Family. That was a strong word. He'd often wished to be with a family in the holidays. But, as he'd reminded himself, he did have Minion. And this past year, Roxanne as well.

"Do you miss them?"

Fire nodded. "Remmy and I tried to call them the other day. Of course it didn't work, but it was worth a shot."

"Minion told me."

There was a short pause, before she continued. "I'm moving away in the fall. For the first time I'm not going to live with my family. It's kind of scary, you know?"

"Do you wish you were there? Back home in your... world?"

The brows tangled as Fire thought about it. "Yes and no. There's a lot I miss about my home, but then again..." Shuffling closer, she got close enough to bump her bottle against his arm. "You and Minion are great roommates. All my life I've dreamed to fall into a movie or a book. I'm happy to be here, really, I am! It's amazing! But I'm homesick too. So when you said you'd come so far on the portal, well, I wasn't sure how to feel about it. I want to go home, yet I want to stay."

Bangs fell over her face and hid her expression from him, but he didn't have to see it to read her. He could imagine that all this was more or less messing up her brain.

"This May was supposed to be special," Fire whispered. "This was supposed to be _the _May."

Frowning, Megamind tried to understand what she meant. _The _May? The May...

"Remmy said that you were supposed to participate in some special celebration you'd been looking forward to."

"Yeah. _Russefeiringa." _

"Care to translate?"

With an unamused dry laughter, Fire translated it. "The Russ Celebration. It's for seniors, for Russ. For three weeks we celebrate that we're finishing 12 to 13 years of school. It was-" Clearing her throat, she continued. "It was supposed to end today. This would be the last day of it."

"A big thing?"

Wide eyed, Fire looked up and nodded. "The _biggest! _Children in _kindergarten_ look forwards to it! I just can't help but wonder..." Taking a deep breath, she let the rest of it out. "What if time _doesn't _stand still back home! What if my family are looking for me right now! What if I'm missing my celebration! Well, that's not right, because if time doesn't stand still, it means I'm _failing _as we speak and I'll have to take yet _another _year at a school I can't wait to get away from. And in that case I'll lose my place at the Folk High School I'm supposed to attend this fall. And I'll be a total screw up who has scared her family by suddenly disappearing! And everything will just go straight to _hell!"_

While shouting all this, she tugged at her hair and spoke so quickly Megamind could barely hear what she was saying. When she finally ended, she was resting her head against her knees with her fingers still entangled in the brown hair. Her back was slightly shaking, as if she was trying not to cry.

"Hey," Megamind tried, while moving closer so that he could clumsily pet a hand on Fire's back. "It will be OK. Everything indicates that time stands still. And if it doesn't, well, then you'll figure something out. You just have to tell your parents you... um..."

"Fell through a portal that led me to a movie and a world where my eyes are the size of apricots?"

Megamind frowned. "Yeah, that's been a bit confusing to me. You keep saying it like that's a weird thing."

With a giggle that showed her mood was slowly lightening, Fire said "Yeah, it _is _a weird thing. I'll show you a picture of me on my computer. You'll be surprised by our real anatomy. I can tell you right now, with that big head and that skinny neck, you'd have some serious problems in my world."

Touching his neck, Megamind mused "Really?"

"Oh yeah. You, my friend, would have been dead already."

"Huh."

Fire straightened her back again to look at the view of the city. It was still early afternoon and the sun stood high, shining on the buildings and making the water in the lake sparkle. For what Megamind decided was two minutes and 12 seconds, they sat in silence.

He hadn't stopped to think about what the girls might be missing about their home or what they should do if time didn't stand still. He most surely hadn't thought about how strange it would be for them to be in a foreign country! They were still so young and unsecure and immature.

...

OK, so he wasn't the most mature person he knew of either!

But no matter how much Fire said she was a legal adult in Norway, she was still a child. To fall into a whole other world would be difficult to handle for anyone, but maybe being a teen made it even more difficult. Didn't teens have a bunch of problems to begin with? Megamind had his share of them at that age, even though his problems had been slightly difficult, considering his career choice.

Fire was rolling a bottle between her palms, watching it rotate with foggy eyes.

"It _will_ be OK." She looked up to meet his eyes. "It's not like there's something you can do about it right now anyway. No need to worry about all that when you can't do anything. And in the meantime-" Megamind said, and bumped her shoulder with the bottle he'd cooled his thigh with, just like she'd done only a few minutes ago "-we can have a good time here in _my _world."

With a little chuckle, Fire lifted her bottle to touch it against his. _"Du har rett, Blåbær."_

"Do I need to use the remote again, or will you translate it for me if I ask nicely?"

"I said that you're right."

"And that last word?" he asked with a smirk, already knowing what it meant, and knowing that she knew he knew.

Rolling her eyes, Fire mumbled, "Blueberry."

"Knew it."

"I know."

With a deep breath, Megamind prepared himself to use a word that rarely escaped his mouth. "I'm sorry I yelled at you."

"I know that too. I'm sorry I woke you up when you hadn't had a decent sleep in days."

"It's fine."

A hand was suddenly reached out for him, and he stared at it.

"_Venner?"_

With a smile, he took the hand and shook it. "Friends."

And with that, they'd made up.

Megamind laid the cool bottle against his still burning thigh while Fire put her bottle to her lips and drank the rest up in one sip, tilting her head all the way back.

"Sorry to interrupt."

The two turned to see Minion and Remmy approaching, both with smiles that dripped of secret.

The fish continued, his eyes jumping from one to the other while reading the friendship in their faces. "Miss Remmy and I have a surprise for you, Miss Fire."

Fire frowned and looked around. "Oh?"

"We'll have to drive there," Remmy explained.

"OK, then." Megamind rose and gave the teen an encouraging smile. "Let's go find out what it is then, shall we?"

* * *

The Invisible Car drove up a street to take a stop on a free parking spot.

"We're here!" Minion declared and Fire looked around.

"What is it?"

"Roll down your window!" Remmy suggested and her friend did as told, revealing that music could be heard outside.

_Vi er bønda i fra nord,_

_ta vel i mot oss._

_Banker alt på fremmed jord,_

_og vi veit hvor du bor._

_Hils på bønda i fra nord._

"W-Wait," Fire stuttered. "I know this song!" Bopping her head and grinning, she whispered the lyrics:

_Sola skinner, Flo spinner, Ivers er klar,_

_Myggen og Berg har med minibar._

"It's an old soccer song! Used at the Eurovision Championship in 2000!"

_Sommer er fotball, går aldri lei,_

_harry eller ei vi er på vei._

_Vi leker oss med Slovenia, sorry Jugoslavia, adios España!_

Megamind lifted an eyebrow at the name 'Jugoslavia.' "Old indeed!"

But Fire didn't listen to him, only searching the street for wherever the song was coming from, finding what looked like a bar. The windows were decorated with different flags, all with red, white or blue in them and the shape of a cross in the middle.

"Wait, is this..."

"This, Miss Fire, is a Scandinavian Bar! Miss Remmy and I did a Google search for places that celebrated the Norwegian national day in Metro City, and this place came up."

Megamind did a shooing gesture towards the grinning girl. "Well, what are you waiting for? Go!"

So with a last smile, Fire ran out of the car and down towards the bar. She ripped open the door, and raised a fist as she too joined the people in there in song.

_Vi er bønda i fra nord,_

_ta vel i mot oss._

_Banker alt på fremmed jord_

_og vi veit hvor du bor._

_Her er bønda i fra nord_

"Do we dare follow?" wondered Megamind.

"Sure! I want to see what it looks like!" Remmy exclaimed, and got out of the car too.

The two aliens turned their watches, giving them the appearance of random citizens. Better not stir up too much in there.

The bar was specked with people. Several were wearing T-shirts with flags or soccer shirts. A bunch of people were even wearing plastic helmets with horns. Megamind frowned. Historical incorrect. The Vikings didn't have horned helmets.

It seemed everyone was having a great time. Those old enough by American regulations were lifting their beers while singing terribly. Those who weren't old enough mimicked it with bottles of soda.

On top of a table was a group of teens, dressed in bright coloured overalls and hats. And among them was Fire, wearing a borrowed red hat with a long string, her arms around two of the other's shoulders and singing along.

_Vi er bønda i fra nord,_

_ta vel i mot oss._

_Banker alt på fremmed jord_

_og vi veit hvor du bor._

_Her er bønda i fra nord_

"Seems Miss Fire is having a good time!" Minion said and watched as the girl along with the others took the wave at the end of the song.

"_OK, folka. Da tar vi nasjonalsangen! __'Ja, Vi Elsker!"_

The bartender walked up to the stereo to change the song and Megamind called up to Fire. "If you're not home by seven we'll come and pick you up! I want to taste those waffles!"

"_Den er grei!" _she called back and gave a thumbs up.

Looking around, Megamind saw Remmy by a table with some more teenagers wearing the coloured overalls, handing her what looked like business cards.

"Are you coming home with us?"

"I'll stay with Fire! It seems Australians are rather popular among Scandinavians!"

The teenagers around her underlined it by cheering and bumping their alcohol free drinks together. As the two aliens left, they heard the new song start; a march that sometimes went to high for anyone in the bar to properly hit the notes.

_Ja, vi elsker dette landet_

_Som det stiger frem_

_Furet værbitt over vannet_

_Med de tusen hjem_

_Elsker, elsker det og tenker_

_På vår far og mor_

_Og den saganatt som senker, _

_Drømme på vår jord_

_Og den saganatt som senker_

_Senker drømme på vår jord_

* * *

It was half past six when the girls arrived back at the Lair, their hands filled with these coloured business cards, reading aloud what was on them.

"Oh oh, this one! 'I'm not drunk, only chemically imbalanced'!"

"I don't give a ** about who your dad is! Go find some other water to walk on, here I'm gonna fish!"

"I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head up my butt!"

"Remember you're unique. Just like everyone else!"

Minion smiled at the teens. "Did you have a good time?"

"It was a _blast!" _Fire whined and waived with a Norwegian flag she'd gotten from somewhere. "We sang, collected Russe cards and everyone in the bar went for a mini parade down the street!"

"So, are you going to let us in on the celebration?" Megamind asked, making the girl grin from ear to ear in glee.

"I'll go make some waffles!"

* * *

**Hell yeah! Tomorrow is our national day! It's gonna be great! Wohooo!**

**Tisa: You want some iced cream?**

**If you want to know more about the Russe Celebration, go check out my youtube video! Over at DevArt I also have a story up telling just what happened when I was going to the Russ' national convention at Lillehammer (where I forgot my ticket).**

**Songs used:**

**Norge i rødt, hvitt og blått- Glittertind's rock version**

**La Perla- Kobojsarna**

**Alt For Norge- Drillos**

**Bønda ifra nord- DumDum Boys**

**And go google 'Norwegian waffles'.**


	39. Chapter 39

**You make me sick! You are offered meat and you choose a banana-split-with-nuts. ~Martin H. Fischer**

* * *

**Banana Fish Split**

Living in the Lair with two aliens meant you got to see a whole lot of weird things. Like Megamind trying to get a T-shirt on, or a pin-up-picture of Ariel in a wallet. That's life in 3D. Though my eyes _did _widen a whole lot when I walked into the kitchen, seeing Minion leaning against the counter while eating... A banana split?

I couldn't help but grin. "Minion? What on _earth _is that?"

He looked down at what was on his plate. "A banana split."

With a giggle, I shook my head, trying to understand what I was seeing. "OK, but what's that on top?"

"Fish flakes and anchovies."

"Aha. So you _do _eat fish?"

There was a moment of uncertainty, before Minion decided; "It doesn't count."

"O...K... Why not?" I asked and crossed my arms, still with the amused grin plastered across my face. It grew when I understood I had cornered him.

"So... Miss Fire..." Minion tried, the wheels turning. "About that leather jacket..."

_Pokker._

I sighed and threw my hands in the air. "You win." With a curious pout I leaned forward to look more closely at the banana split with the anchovies. "Is that any good?"

"Sure! Do you want to try?"

With a shrug, I said, "OK!" After all, you shouldn't be afraid of trying new things.

I regretted twenty seconds later.

* * *

At the 'Megamind' site at facebook, I found a link to what apparently was Minion answering fan's questions. Not sure if it was official or not, but it was freaking funny! There this was:

**GNOletsgo1 asks: Dear, Minion, do you eat fish food or bananas? Or both? I am curious.**  
**Minion: **Heaping portions of both. In fact, I have a killer recipe for a Banana Fish Split. Here it is:

Step 1: Make a banana split.Step 2: Put fish on it.Step 3: Eat.

I promise you, tastes EVEN BETTER than it sounds

I know it should probably stand 'Put fish flakes on it', but in a message to Remmy, I mentioned Minion ordering pizza with anchovies, sooo... NEXT CHAPTER IS CHAPTER 40! (I do count 'Remmy and Fire's golden crab nuggets' as a chapter)


	40. Chapter 40

******Guardian of the Emerald City Gates**: Now, state your business.  
**Dorothy**: We want to see the wizard!  
**Guardian of the Emerald City Gates**: The wizard? But nobody can see the great Oz, nobody's *ever* seen the great Oz... even I've never seen him!  
**Dorothy**: Well then, how do you know there is one?

* * *

**A VERY F'd Up Dream**

"Hah! Hand over what you've got, Fire!"

"_Pokker ta! _Roxanne, you're enjoying this way too much." I took one last look at the very last thing I still owned: a get out of jail free card. "Here. I'm bankrupted and out."

Megamind pouted. "They should have made those in real life, too. I could have gotten out of prison _so _easily."

"You still did anyway, sweetie," Roxanne told him, and gave her boyfriend a peck on the forehead, giving him a goofy grin.

"Minion, your turn," I mumbled, and handed him the dices. "If only I hadn't lost _Slottsparken..."_

"It wasn't the Castle's Park in Oslo! This is American monopoly and Boardwalk," Remmy reminded be for the tenth time, petting Zathia. "You're not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy." I only poked my tongue at her, and turned to watch Minion throw the dices. Of course he landed on one of Roxanne's hotels; she _did_ own the whole of the board.

"Hand it over, Minion."

"Here, Miss Ritchi."

As the game's very last bill that didn't belong to the reporter was given to her, the winner was declared by Megamind. "And my Roxanne wins this game of Monopoly! Anyone up for one more game?"

With a yawn, I stood up from the couch. "I'm out, guys. The flame has lost her spark and is going to bed."

"You sure?" Remmy asked. "We could team up and beat the others' buts!"

"Hey!" the blue alien whined. "Cheating!"

"No, it's not."

"Yes, it is!"

"No."

"Yes!"

"Once again, I'm going to bed," I repeated, deciding that sleep was much more inviting right now rather than listening to Remmy and Megamind 'discuss'. _"Natta."_

"Night, Miss Fire!"

"Good night!"

"Bowg."

"No, it's not cheating!"

"Yes, it is!"

* * *

"Not in Kansas anymore," I mumbled, rolled my eyes, and put the blanket over me. "I'm closer to Kansas than I am to Norway, anyway." The translator was carefully placed on the floor next to my mattress. For a moment, I stared at it with empty eyes. I didn't use it very often; mostly when there was a word I didn't know how to translate into English. Megamind has decided to take over as my 'tutor' and meant that talking English as much as possible would be good for me. But despite that I'd gotten so used to wearing it, so much that even taking it out during the night felt strange to me. In a very weird way, I felt connected to it. After all, the little blue and black thing was the only thing in the Lair what really understood me. In a language level, that is.

With a tired sigh, I closed my eyes and let sleep take over.

"Pft, Kansas..." I snorted again before falling asleep.

* * *

_Pokker, _why were things moving? I felt dizzy!

Slowly I opened my eyes with a groan. "Remmy, I think I'm going sick again."

And opened them wide!

When had we invested in a window for the storage room? The light outside sent a cold, white light in. I tugged the blanket around me and got up. Remmy had said it was OK for me to only sleep in my panties, but if I was going to stand in a window, I'd rather be covered!

The outside was _not _familiar! I had expected to see the industry area of Metro City; instead it was white and grey clouds in a way I'd never seen before; quickly moving and up close! And... Wait... Holy cow, was that a flying car? With a gasp I pressed my face to the window. Before I had the time to digest it, the car was replaced with a barn; making my jaw fall. _Dæven! _A flying barn! What was going on?

Then came the most disturbing: a cubby redhead flying on his camera!

"Hal?" Oh god, what on _earth_ was going on?

The next minute the cubby camera man turned into Tighten; afro and all.

Wait... Was he wearing _high heels? _I blinked and fell into laughter. _Herregud, _Tighten was wearing high heels!

He disappeared and I suddenly felt my stomach argue. My body felt light as the storage room fell. "This isn't good! Oh god, this isn't good!"

I fell and fell and fell. My feet actually lost connection to the floor, and I wrapped the blanket closer around me.

Then, with a crash, the storage room landed, and I was thrown hard against the floor.

Half an inch from the soft mattress. "Ouch! _Svarte!" _I cursed and got up on my feet. Better get out of here before something else weird happened.

"Remmy? Minion?" I called and opened the door. "You won't believe-"

There I stopped.

Because this was _not _the hallway!

"Where am I?" I asked out loud, walking out of the room and onto the empty street.

Was I still in Metro City? I checked the street sign. Yes, I knew this place. I'd driven through here with Minion and Remmy once when he wanted to show us the city shortly after we'd arrived. We had to know where we'd ended up.

But – one problem.

I was on the freaking _opposite _side of the city from the Lair!

"Aw, come _on!" _I cried. "I just wanted to go to bed? Why does that have to be so freaking difficult?"

"Something wrong?"

With a startled cry I spun round.

But the smile that met me made me stop worrying. Blue eyes with a warm glow made me relax and smile back. "Roxanne, what are you doing here?"

"I'm the Good Witch of the North!" she explained, her smile sweet.

I blinked. "What?"

"The Good Witch of the North!" Roxanne said again.

With a frown, I took in the woman. Yes, she did look rather like a fairy, wearing a beautiful red and black dress and even carrying a wand with a... a microphone at the top.

"You sure? Are you _sure _that Minion didn't make special brownies or something?"

"Minion?" she asked.

"Yeah, the fish. You know... You don't know?"

"No. But I _do _know who the Wicket Witch of the East is!"

Pointing her wand behind me, the Witch made me turn and stare.

Under what clearly looked like a cabin (had I come in that?) there were two feet showing: dressed in white and red spandex and two high heeled shoes.

"_Hva faen? _Tighten's a witch? Seriously?"

"Well, yes of course! And those are the Scarlet Slippers!"

"You mean _ruby _slippers."

"No, scarlet slippers!"

Frowning, I bent over the slippers. Huh; who'd have guessed. They actually _were _scarlet!

A sudden series or 'bow's made me look up again. From around the corners and behind the garbage bins, Brainbots were coming out of hiding, looking at the scene with their glowing red eyes.

"Killing Tighten freed the Brainbots," the Witch explained.

"Yeah," I said and rolled my eyes. "I put a dollar on special brownies."

The curious Brainbots floated over, nervous that it might be a trick. In the end a few of them gathered in front of me. "Um... Hi?"

One of them dropped a wrench. I gave Roxanne a questioning look, and she nodded her head in approval. Picking up the wrench, the Brainbots lost their nervousness and turned into their usual playing nature. "You want the wrench?"

A series of bows told be yes, and with a grin I threw the wrench as far as I could. One of them managed to catch it mid air and flew as fast as it could back to me. The little robot, smaller than the others, dropped it in front of me.

"Zathia?" I asked, getting a bow in answer. "Where's Remmy, girl?"

Zathia looked around, but there was no curly headed teen to be seen. My mood dropped drastically.

And it dropped even more as a loud "_CRACK!" _filled the air and a black cloud appeared on the sidewalk. When the smoke disappeared, my mouth once again fell.

"Metro Man? Come on! _You _can't be a villain!"

But it actually _was_ him: his hero suit golden and black and his face green. The man coughed and tried to wave of the last remains of the smoke.

"Hey," he said. "Being a villain is serious business, you know! And it's the Wicket Witch of the West, to you!"

Huh, he was actually right: the logo on his chest was switched so that it was a W instead of an M!

"What's the deal with all the male witches in this story?" I cried and threw my hands in the air.

"Easy!" Roxanne said. "We're Wiccans!"

Pause.

"OK, then..."

Metro Man suddenly looked horrified and hurried over to the cabin and Tightens legs.

"You killed him!"

"Hey! It wasn't like it was on purpose!"

But the man didn't listen; he only walked over to me with his chest out and his back straight. "So we have a wise one here? It's OK; I'll let it pass. As long as I get the Scarlet Slippers!"

Stopping myself from laughing wasn't easy. Dang; had Metro Man gone drag queen?

"You can't have them!" Roxanne spoke up.

"Why? I have as much right to them as anyone else!"

"Because," she said, and tipped her wand against his nose. "Fire already got them!"

Metro Man looked to my feet in shock, and so did I.

How the heck had those ended up _there? _I moved my feet in order to look at the dandy shoes. "Nice!"

Growling, Metro Man pointed a finger at me. "I will get you, Fire! You and that little Brainbot of yours!"

"Actually, it's not mine! It's Remmy's, and-"

With a deep sigh, Metro Man groaned; "Just play along, will you?"

"Oh right, sorry!" Clearing my throat, I started over again. "Oh no!"

"That's better, thank you," he said and flashed me a bright white smile, before once again disappearing into a black cloud with a _"CRACK!"_

"So? What now?" I asked. "I ought to get home!"

"Ah yes! But you really should consider where to go!"

"Why?"

A knowing smile played over woman's lips. "But you won't get there without any help, Fire! You can't simply go home to the Lair. You'll have to go ask the Wizard of Metro City for help first!"

"What? Can't I just grab a cab or something over to the industrial area?"

She shook her head. "I'm sorry. You see," she leaned forward and whispered; "That wouldn't make a good story, now would it?"

I stared into her eyes and realized; she was right. That _would _make a crappy story!

"OK," I said. "Then how do I get there?"

"You'll have to go and see the Wizard of Metro City! He's downtown in the museum."

"Oh. OK, then! And how do I get _there?"_

The Good Witch of the North moved her wand over the street and the asphalt turned bright yellow. The colour spread; and in the end it was all over the street and disappeared into the distance.

"Wow."

"All you have to do is to follow the yellow street! It will take you to the wizard."

With a great big grin, I put a feet on the yellow asphalt. "OK, then! Thank you very much! I'll just-"

"Wait!" The Witch said; making me stop. "You can't walk through the city in a blanket!"

Oh damn; good point! I looked down on myself and realized I still had it wrapped round me. "Yes, I guess you're right."

"I'll fix it!"

Moving her wand in a spiral, she made blue sparks dance from it and surround me, covering me completely. When the sparks disappeared I found myself dressed in a white shirt and a pretty blue dress.

Very much like a certain dress a certain actress had used in a certain movie.

"Again; wow!"

"Thank you. Now, you ought to get going! You've got a long walk ahead of you!"

So with a wave of my hand, I began walking in my scarlet slippers along the yellow street.

Until a "Bowg!" behind me made me stop. There was Zathia; the wrench in her mouth.

"Hi, girl."

Dropping the wrench, she looked at me just like a dog would. I picked it up and looked thoughtfully at her. "Do you wanna be Toto?"

I took the 'bowg' for a 'yes'.

* * *

"My feet are _killing me!" _I complained Zathia 'bowg'ed at me. "Yes, I am complaining. You try walking though the city in high heeled shoes when you're not used to them!"

Looking around, I searched for a place to sit. And would you know; the yellow street actually split in two! A yellow path lead from the main street and through two gates.

"Metro City Park," I read from the sign over the entrance. "Hey! I'm sure we can find somewhere to sit down in there!"

So with a renewed smile I stepped through the gate and into the bliss of the trees. I didn't walk for more than a minute before I found a bench to sit down on. "Oh, this was a good idea!"

Zathia laid down next to me; but was quickly awakened from her doze when a pigeon flew by. With a loud "Bowg!" she shot up from the bench and set off after the bird.

"Zathia! Wait! Oh no, Remmy will kill me if I lose her in the city!" Quickly I got up from the bench to run after her through the park.

The Brainbot stopped at an open area where the yellow path widened out. But I could hardly see the yellow for the pigeons. Zathia acted just like I'd expect; chasing them around. Laughing, I wished I'd brought a camera!

But then my eyes fell on the thing in the middle of the area; a scarecrow with a great, big hat hiding its face.

"Huh. What a weird place to have a scarecrow!" I said to myself and walked over to it.

It was then I got the worst scare of the whole adventure.

"You said it, girl!"

With another startled cry I jumped back, fell over Zathia who'd just flew by, and landed right on my bum.

"_Hva i helvete?"_

The scarecrow lifted his head, revealing that blue skin and the emerald green eyes. "You really said it! This is the most stupid place in the world to have a scarecrow!" he whined. "Especially one who can't even scare a pigeon! They are a _lot _harder to scare than crows, you know!"

"Megamind?" I cried.

He tilted his head and looked curiously at me. "Yes! How did you know my name? Usually they just say Scarecrow or, well, Scarepigeon... Bad joke, I know."

Getting to my feet I dried the dust off my dress. Thank god I hadn't gotten any bird droppings on it.

"We live together! Don't you remember?"

Megamind only frowned. "What?"

"Ah, never mind!" I said, and decided to let it go. There were so many weird things going on anyway. Megamind not knowing me was only a new addition, I guessed. "So, what are you doing here?"

With sad pout, he looked down at his tied up feet. "They decided I wasn't good enough to scare the crows at the farm; I was too stupid."

"You? Stupid? _What?_"

With one hand he pointed at his head. "Haven't got a brain. It's all straw. Kind of ironic considering the size of this, isn't it?"

Ironic indeed! The genius didn't have a brain! This was rather F'd up!

A pigeon landed on Megamind's shoulder and began picking on the straws sticking up from his jumper. "Hey! Get off!" he whined and tried to shoo it off. When it didn't work, he tried to blow it away.

I scratched my chin. "You know; if you had a spiked collar, then they wouldn't sit on your shoulders."

He stopped blowing and looked at me. "That's a good idea." Then with a grin; "A really _good_ idea! It's probably because you have a brain. I never would have thought of that! Can you imagine all the things I could do if I too had a brain? I could have invented something to keep these pigeons away!"

"Well," I said, "I'm sure we could find some way to fix that! Listen, Megs, I'm going to the Wizard of Metro City! Maybe he can help you get a brain!"

"You really think so?"

"Yeah! He _is _a wizard!"

A great smile spread across the blue lips. "Yeah! He can give me a brain!"

"Then it's decided! Here; I'll help you down from there!"

With a bit of effort I managed to reach up to where his hands were tied to the frame and tie him lose.

Forgetting that his feet were still tied up.

A cry later he was on the ground, his legs twisted in a sick angle. But it didn't seem to frighten him

"All straw!" he explained. "Can't feel a thing!"

"Oh, thank god!"

I got his feet free too and Megamind got himself up.

Falling again.

"You probably need some time to get used to walking. After all, you must have been tied up there a long time!"

"Yeah, you're probably right!" he agreed as I grabbed his hands and got him up again.

"Shall we go?" I asked with a smile.

"All right then!"

And then he fell again.

I giggled and got him up once again. "You should probably keep close to me for support, Megamind."

"You're the one with the brain!"

Shaking my head and rolling my eyes, I grabbed his arm and lead him with me. "I'm sure the wizard can help."

And so we walked off, and I had to admit to myself; I was actually rather glad we hadn't began to sing and dance.

* * *

"I'm getting hungry," I announced. Megamind and Zathia looked at me.

"Really?" the scarecrow asked.

"Yes." Searching for a place to eat, my eyes fell on a pizzeria. "Hey; how about we go in there!"

"Do you have any money?"

"No, but I haven't seen a soul in this city ever since I came. I'm sure no one would mind if we grabbed a bite to eat."

"You've got the brain."

The smell of food hit me when I opened the doors. Another open door led into the dining rooms, but before I got there, a voice stopped me.

"Welcome! How big is the party?"

Turning around, I saw a counter and behind it was a too familiar figure.

"Minion?"

The fish smiled politely from inside the sphere. "A table for three? Here, I'll show you the- Oh. Crab Nuggets. I forgot."

I walked up to the counter and watched him as the fish moved – though the robotic body stood still.

"Something wrong?" Megamind asked and Zathia tilted her body.

"Well, I've... um... rusted." This was clearly embarrassing for him. Maybe getting rusted for him was like a rash would be for a human?

"Do you need help?"

"Oh yes! Thank you! There's an oil can here behind the counter, if you could just oil me up!"

"How did this happen?" Megamind wondered.

"A guest wasn't too happy with the food," Minion explained. "He threw a glass of water on me."

I found the oil can and began oiling up the stuck limbs. "Not cool of him!"

"Not at all! I've been stuck here ever since! There's not many visitors around here."

"Yeah, we've noticed. There, can you move now?"

Minion lifted and arm and smiled. "Yes!" Then he walked a few steps. "Good as new, in fact! Thank you!"

"You're welco-" I began, but was interrupted by my own stomach.

We all stared at it while my face turned red. "Heh... hungry."

"Oh! Right! You three just go and find a table; I think there's a pizza in the oven!"

"There's a pizza in the oven, and he's been rusted stuck," Megamind whispered to me, "How does that even work? Is the pizza made of coal?"

Shrugging, I walked into the dining area. "No idea. But if there's one thing I've learned here, then it is to play along, otherwise it will make a boring story!"

We sat at a table, eating our pizza. Even in here Minion was a great cook! The pizza was quickly eaten all up (don't ask me how Megamind was able to eat when he was stuffed with straw, because I have no idea).

I leaned back in my chair, dozy after the dinner. "Minion, you're a _great _cook!"

"Thank you!" he grinned.

"This was perfect!" Megamind agreed, but this time, the fish's face fell.

"Not perfect. Here!" With a robotic hand, Minion hit his chest. A hollow sound filled it. "You can't be perfect without a heart."

I frowned. God dammit; he was a _fish! _Of course he had a heart! But before I had the chance to say anything, Megamind gasped.

"You don't have a _heart? _Really?"

Minion nodded. "Really. And without a heart, I can't feel properly. I can only imagine how that's like. To be gentle, and tender and all of that."

Again I opened my mouth to mention that fish have hearts, but again Megamind got a word in first.

"You could come with us! We're going to the Wizard of Metro City! I'm going to ask if he can give me a brain, and Fire is going to ask to get home!"

"Really?"

At the sight of Minion's face lighten up, I decided; what the Hell. Wasn't it like Metro Man had said? Just play along.

"Sure, Minion," I said. "You can come with us!"

"I can? Oh! Oh thank you!"

Floating up from her chair, Zathia said "Bowg", flew to the door, stopped and looked at us.

"I think Zathia wants us to head off. Let's go, guys!"

The two others got up from the chair and followed.

"We're off to see the Wizard then!" Minion cheered.

"Yeah!" I smiled. "The wonderful wizard of Metro City!"

* * *

"I'm not sure I like this street," Megamind whispered.

"Me neither," I agreed and we all moved a big closer to each other.

Minion looked down on me. "Maybe we should stay quiet, just in case?"

"Good idea!"

The street was narrow and dark. Along the corners there were piles of garbage, and once in a while I was certain I heard something rattle through them.

"Do you think there's anything here we should be scared of?" the blue scarecrow asked.

"I don't know. Gangsters?"

"I don't like those!" Minion said, and pulled out the Forget-Me-Stick, just in case.

A sudden high noise made us wince and look up at the sky. Something pink flew by up there and disappeared without seeing us.

"Was... was that a flying pig?" I asked, not sure if I'd seen that or not.

"They belong to the Wicket Witch of the West," Megamind explained, and Minion nodded.

"I've heard they have very sharp teeth!"

"That's not good."

We kept close as we walked through the street, on the lookout for more flying pigs.

But as we kept staring at the sky, we forgot to look out for things here on the ground!

"Freeze, weirdoes!"

All of us stopped and rose our hands in the air (or in Zathia's case; tendrils).

"OK, now, hand over your weapons!"

"Don't have any!" I explained, hoping that whoever was behind us would just sod off.

"You got to have _something?"_

"You thief!" Megamind accused her, and the person growled.

"What! I'm not a thief! I just want something to keep those pigs away! Don't you know what they do! They lift you up in the air. _High _up in the air..."

The person's voice got thin, and I turned my head to see whoever it was.

"Remmy?" I asked, surprised to see her here. The brown, curly hair floated down her shoulders; longer and thicker than usual. A handkerchief was bound around her head and she was wearing a brown, baggy T-shirt and a spiked leather bracelet. Trying to be a scary gangster, but not really managing it.

"Really high, you know!" The hazel green eyes searched the sky in horror. "Really, really high. I'm scared of heights! And they know, and they sweep down and pick me up just because they know I'm afraid!"

I let my hands fall and stepped over to her. "Oh, Remmy. That's mean of them!"

"Yes, it is!" she whined.

Of all the people, Remmy had taken this role. The girl who usually was so tough! Except for that little problem; the height problem. "And they don't let you down until you're really, really terrified!"

I looked at the gun she was holding. It wasn't even real, but made of plastic. Had she been trying to keep them at a distance with _that_?

"Hey, it's OK!" Minion said and placed a hand on her shoulder. "You don't have to be afraid!"

"Those pigs are really mean!"

"We know, Miss, it's very mean of them!"

I stared at the sky, almost wishing a pig would come so that I could beat the hot dogs out of it!

"It would be so much easier if only I wasn't afraid of heights," Remmy mumbled, staring at her feet.

"Why don't you come with us, Miss?" Minion asked.

"Yeah!" I agreed. "We're going to the Wizard! He's giving Megamind a brain and Minion a heart and he's going to get me home! I'm sure he can give you some courage so that you won't be scared of heights anymore too!"

"You think so?"

Megamind smiled. "Of course!"

With a "Bowg" Zathia flew up to Remmy, who closed her arms around her. "Hey, this is a cute one! And she's too small to lift me up and fly off with me!"

Rolling my eyes, I began to walk. "I think you and Zathia will get along very well, Remmy."

* * *

When we had walked for over half an hour more, we once again stopped. This time the way was blocked.

"Come on! Don't they ever clean in this city?"I cried.

Minion frowned. "Doesn't seem like it. That's kind of weird, isn't it?"

We stared at the obstacle; piles of empty spray cans were blocking our way.

"What should we do?" Megamind asked. "If I had a brain, I'm sure I could have thought something out."

A sigh escaped me as I looked at it. "We'll have to walk over them."

"Over them?" Remmy did a disgusted grimace. "It's garbage!"

"It's only empty spray cans!" I shrugged. "I'm sure it'll be OK. It's not like it's rotten food or something!"

"It's still garbage."

I placed my foot on the ground between two piles, on top of a spray can. It wasn't easy keeping my balance on the round thing, but I quickly sat my foot down somewhere else.

"Well, come on!"

Following first was Minion. It was surprising that the cans actually held his weight! But they did, and right after him followed the three others. Zathia was lucky; she could merely fly over the cans.

I poked my tongue out between my teeth as I concentrated on keeping my balance. "This is good exercise!" I mumbled. "But I'd rather reach the end so-ooooo!" Finally I'd lost my balance and fallen straight into a pile of cans.

Which turned out to be not as empty as I'd first thought! The containment filled the air around me.

And sent me straight into sleep.

* * *

"Miss Fire? Miss Fire, are you awake?"

"Fire?"

"Bowg?"

I coughed and slowly opened my eyes. "Minion? Megs? Zathia?" The three were leaned over me, waking me up from a deep sleep.

By my side, someone else moved too.

"Miss Remmy!"

"What happened?" she asked, still dozy.

"It was the spray cans! You feel asleep," Megamind explained.

Why hadn't it hit me the moment I saw them? "Knock-out-spray," I mumbled.

"What, Miss Fire?"

"Nothing."

Sitting up, I felt my head swim. I'd gotten a serious spray!

"How long were we out?" Remmy groaned, probably feeling just as terrible as me.

"An hour. Minion, Zathia and I got you out of there. That's the good thing about not breathing!"

I frowned. Megamind didn't breathe, yet he'd eaten pizza earlier? OK, then.

The sound of bins falling filled the air, and we got a glimpse of a flying pig escaping the crime scene.

"The Wicket Witch of the West!" Minion gasped. "It was her- I mean- _his_ idea! He probably wanted to get you for having the Scarlet Slippers!"

A quick look at my feet told me that I still had them. Thank god!

"We should hurry away from here! The sooner we reach the Wizard, the better!"

* * *

Finally we got there! Finally the yellow street ended at the long pool in front of the museum. For a moment we all stood still looking at the tall building.

"There's no statue," I mused.

"What statue?" Megamind asked, not knowing what I was talking about.

"Um... Never mind. Let's just get inside and see the Wizard!

The doors opened with a "swoosh", and we walked into the museum.

Megamind began looking around. "There's nothing here! What a lousy museum."

"Maybe that guy knows something?" Minion suggested, pointing at a man with a wagon filled of books.

"Bernard!" I called, and he looked up.

"Excuse me. We're closed."

Wow, his voice really _was_ dry and boring!

"We're not here to look at the... um... exhibition... We want to see the wizard!"

The man only stared at me with bored eyes.

"You can't."

"_What?"_ we whined

"You can't. No one sees the wizard. Are you stupid or something? Do I have to keep repeating myself?"

"But we've walked all day!" I cried.

"You still can't. Only special guests may meet him."

With a toothy smile, Minion stepped forward. "But the Good Witch of the North sent Fire here to see the Wizard!"

Rolling his eyes, Bernard didn't seem very convinced. "Yeah right. Prove it!"

"She has the Scarlet Slippers!" Remmy pointed out, making Bernard eyes fall to my feet.

There was a moment of annoyed silence.

"OK, then. I'll take you... tourists... to him."

Bernard took the lead and we followed him through the museum.

Leaning towards me, Megamind whispered, "Someone really needs to go on anti-depressive!"

We giggled, but stopped when Bernard mumbled "I heard that." Embarrassed, we kept going.

"In there. And don't bother me any further. I've got work to do."

Bernard had stopped, only just bothering to show us the great white door was there before he walked off.

We watched him go, leaving us in front of the door.

"Merry guy, huh?" Minion said sarcastically.

I laid a hand on the door knob and took a deep breath. "Here goes nothing!"

Then I slowly opened it.

But it wasn't anything to be worried about in there! There was only green smoke. Curious and uncertain, we walked in, approaching the smoke.

"Um, hello?" Remmy tried.

"_Come forward!"_

The loud voice made us jump and take a few steps back. _Faen, _that was loud! I put my fingers in my ears and called back. "Care to turn down for the volume?"

Then, in the green smoke, a face showed itself; the head big to match the loud voice.

And his moustache, too.

"Warden?" I gawked, but he either didn't hear me, or didn't care.

"_I am the great Wizard of Metro City! What do you want?"_

"Here's your chance!" Megamind said and Zathia gave me a push in the back, sending me a few steps forward.

"Um. Hi! Rox- I mean- The Witch of the North sent us! We have some wishes you might be able to help us with."

The Wizard cocked a brow. _"All right then. What are they?"_

"I want to go home!" I called up to him.

"I want a brain!" Megamind called.

"I'd like a heart, please!"

"And I want a gun or a tank or something so that I can blast those flying pigs into sausages!"

We all looked at Remmy in disbelief. She noticed and shrugged. "What? Oh, fine then. I'd like to get rid of my fear of heights!"

"_Courage then!" _The Wizard decided. _"But no."_

"What? Come _on!" _I groaned. "You're not serious! It's taken us a long time to get here!" A bit more annoyed now, I walked forward and pointed a finger at him. "Listen, old guy! I've been walking in these _jævla _high heeled Scarlet Slippers all day, and now I'm tired! I want to get home and get to bed!"

The Warden Wizard seemed a bit confused at first, then thoughtful. _"OK, then! I'll grant you your wishes. On __one_ _term! You'll bring me the cape of the Wicket Witch of the West!"_

"Metro Man's cape?"

"_Yes! You bring me Metro Man's cape, and I'll grant you your wishes! Now go! I've got work to attend to!"_

Megamind tilted his head in question. "What kind of work does a floating head have?"

"_None of your beeswax! Go!"_

"Come on, guys," I said and grabbed Megamind's arm. "We have to find a way to get that stupid cape!"

* * *

We'd sat down on the stairs outside the museum, trying to come up with a plan.

It wasn't a very easy task...

I sighed and placed my head in my hands. "How are we going to get to Metro Man's hideout? It's so far."

Remmy looked up me from the step below. "You know where his hideout is?"

"Yes! Of course! I've seen the movie seventeen times. It's in the old school house at the cliff."

They all stared at me with renewed interest. As I began to feel a bit embarrassed about the unwanted attention, I cleared my throat and got them back on track. "So, how _are _we going to get there?"

Widening his eyes and staring at something, Megamind whispered. "I don't think that will be a problem!"

We followed his eyes, seeing what clearly was a pack of pink, flying things headed towards us.

"U-oh. This isn't good."

Remmy's face went pale as they came nearer. "Oh no! Oh no, oh no, oh no!"

Understanding the problem, Minion quickly picked her up, holding her in his arms. "It will be OK, Miss Remmy! Just don't look down!"

I frowned and stared at the pigs. "Wait a minute. They're pigs. How are they supposed to carry us without han-"

Before I had the chance to finish, I found out. Apparently the pigs had teeth like warthogs, and two of them neatly slid their teeth under the straps of my dress, lifting me up from the ground. "Hey!" I cried and quickly grabbed the skirt of my dress to tighten it around my thighs. No one needed to know the colour of my underwear!

The two guys were more difficult: Megamind had to hold onto the teeth while it took six to lift Minion's robotic body. Though somehow they managed, and next thing we knew, we were high above the ground.

To Remmy's frustration!

Thankfully Minion was on it, making sure the little gangster didn't look down. In the distance we could now see the school house; painted black and rather scary looking with the crows and the pigs flying around it.

"You know," I said looking straight forward without blinking, "I'm not sure I should be glad we're closer to getting our wishes, or scared to death that I'm this far above the ground being carried by flying pigs."

"Be glad," Megamind suggested. "The _sen-sau-ti-oon_ is much more pleasurable!"

"Sensation."

"Potato, tomato."

Without caring for our safety, the pigs dropped us three metres above the ground in front of the entrance. I landed hard on my left leg, biting my lip so that I wouldn't cry out more than possible. Still I allowed myself a, _"Svarte faen!"_

A helping hand from Megamind got me back on my feet and I brushed off my dress. "Thanks, Megs. So, shall we go inside?"

The pigs had surrounded us and the building, ready to force us inside if needed. They didn't have to worry; I just tripped straight up to the door in my Scarlet Slippers and opened it. The room was dark and filled with spider webs. The only light was the little sunshine that managed to shine through the dirty windows. In the very back of the room, there were stairs leading down.

"Down there?" Minion asked.

"Down there!"

Carefully because of the heeled shoes, I lead the way down the stairs and into a long dark hallway. Behind me I knew my friends were following, and the pigs. That cape was mine, and those animals could just _try _and stop me!

Finally we reached the door in the end of the hallway and I reached out and opened it.

The room was surprisingly clean after the spider webbed first floor. Still; it was dark and the interior was black and golden.

Megamind gawked at the exhibition along the circular wall. "Did he really keep all this stuff?"

"Huh, here's an old broom!" Remmy noticed. "Shaped like a guitar. That's so corny!"

Someone coughed and turned in worry. Metro Man, hands on hips, was standing in the door glaring at us. "I didn't think you'd come that easily. You robbed my pigs from a lot of fun. They rather like to tear things apart. I'd promised them the scarecrow."

Megamind's eyes widened and he took a step to the side so he was half hidden behind Minion.

I glared at the male Witch. "That's not very nice of you, now is it? Do you really have to be so mean? Do your _pigs _really have to be so mean! What _i helvete _do you expect to get from this?"

"What do you think?" he said surprised. "The Scarlet Slippers of course! Hand them over, girl!"

"And what if I refuse?"

The man frowned and snapped his fingers. Two of the pigs got closer to Megamind, their sharp teeth looking even sharper than usual. Protecting as always, Minion moved so that he was in front of the scarecrow, but two other pigs tried to get to him from the other side.

"Oh _don't you dare!" _I growled. "No one is tearing up _my friend!"_

"It's very easy for me to make them do just that!" Metro Man announced, not meeting my eyes, but studying his fingernails.

"And I'm very interested in just how sensitive your balls are if I try to smash that guitar broom into them!"

It didn't seem to frighten him though. "I have no weakness. Don't you know?"

Oh dammit, that was right. I looked at Megamind, squeezed in between Remmy, Minion and Zathia, shielding him from the pigs.

Invulnerable Metro Man. Not invulnerable Megamind.

"OK. OK, you can have the stupid slippers!" I sat down and tried to pull my shoes off.

But they wouldn't get off!

I tried again, and pulled harder. No, no use!

"They... They won't come off!" I whined.

"What?"

"They're stuck!"

Suddenly Metro Man looked scared. "U-uh. Um... Pigs, get outside and guard the front door!"

That was a strange order! We were all confused as the pigs flew and walked out of the room, the door being shut behind them.

As soon as the pigs were gone, Metro Man got down on his knees and took my foot, trying to get the shoe off without hurting me.

Not even he could.

"They really _are_ stuck!"

"Told you!"

"What do I do now?"

Blinking, I didn't quite understand what he meant. "I don't know. Aren't you a wicked witch? Shouldn't you, I don't know, kill me or something and then cut off my legs and use a spoon to carve my feet out."

He looked downright horrified. "I should _what? _No! No, I don't kill people?"

We all gawked. "I think I've missed some crucial fact here," Remmy said. "Aren't you _wicked? _Didn't you just threaten Megamind?"

With a sad expression, Metro Man sat down on the black couch. "He wouldn't have died. He's only made of straw anyway! I'm supposed to be wicked. But you won't believe how backbreaking it is to be evil!"

"I can imagine," Megamind shrugged. "But it doesn't have to be a life time gig, does it?"

"Yes! Everyone expect me to do this for life! I can't just quit!"

I suddenly pitied the man. He really looked tired; with the early greyed hair and even some bags under his eyes.

That's when it hit me.

"You could fake your death!"

Everyone looked at me. "He can what?" Minion asked.

"Fake his death! It's not that difficult, is it? Then you can run off and make a new life somewhere! Of course the complexion will be a bit revealing but-"

"No problem!" grinned Metro Man and dragged a finger over his cheek; revealing the peach skin underneath. "It's makeup! To make me look more evil!"

"Huh, what's that for a twist," I mumbled to myself. "OK, then, how do we set this up?"

"I know! I know!" Megamind said, tripping. "Everyone says witches melt if they get water on them!"

"Yes! Yes, that could work! It's only a myth anyway! I'll call my pigs back in, the fish can spit some water on me, and we can pretend I melt!"

"Can we have your cape, then? I mean, if you don't need it anymore?"

"Sure!" He unfastened his cape and handed it to me. "I'll get some new clothes. I've always heard I look good in white anyway."

Then he placed his fingers in his mouth and whistled. "OK, everyone. Play along!"

The door opened and the pigs flew in, surrounding us again.

Metro Man turned to me, his eyes again fierce.

"You _shall _hand me the Scarlet Slippers! If it's the last thing you do!"

"And what do you plan to do about it?"

"I plan to plant my flowers on your _grave!"_

"Remember, you get further with sugar than vinegar!"

"But vinegar has a better colour!"

"It's also sour, and I prefer sweet!"

"Then I'll give you poisoned _cookies!"_

"It's COOKEZ!" Remmy shot in. "With Z and no I!"

"Stay out of this, curly!"

"The more the merrier!"

"Girls, girls!" Minion interrupted, showing his palms and smiling. "You're all pretty, can we get on with it now?"

"Minion!" Megamind whined. "It was just getting exiting!"

But Metro Man agreed. "The fish is right! If you won't give me the Scarlet Slippers, I'll just have to get them myself!"

And so he threw himself at me, like he'd done if he'd planned to catch me. Minion was ready, quickly spitting out some water from his sphere.

It hit Metro Man in the back of the head, and like a true drama queen he cried out. "Nooo! I'm melting! This is it! I'm melting!" And as he cried so, black smoke filled the air around him, and he actually made it seem as if he was melting! Before he fully disappeared, he flashed me a smile and winked.

Then he was gone.

And we had his cape.

The pigs seemed confused, walking and flying in circles, not sure what to do now. In the end, they did what looked like a shrug and headed for the door. With no Wicked Witch of the West to serve anymore, they probably decided to leave and find something better to do.

"We did it?" Minion mused.

"We did it! But now there's the next problem. How are we supposed to get _back?"_

Our thoughts were interrupted by a soft blue light that suddenly occurred in the centre of the room. "I can help you with that," a voice said. The light disappeared, and once again Roxanne was there in her black and red fairytale dress and microphone wand.

"The Good Witch of the North!" Remmy exclaimed, and Roxanne sent her a smile.

"That's right. Now, if everyone would just gather around me, and I'll get you back to the Wizard of Metro City!"

We all surrounded her, holding hands to make a circle. And with a flick of the wand, the blue light was back and we left the Wicked Witch of the West's hideout.

And back we were at the Museum.

"We'll get our wishes! I'll get rid of my fear of heights!" Remmy yelled happily.

"We are!" I yelled back. "I'm gonna go home!"

"I'm going to get a heart!"

When the next one didn't say anything we looked around to see if we'd accidentally left Megamind behind.

But we hadn't, and instead we all began to smile.

He was standing a few steps below us, talking to the Witch, his blue face slightly indigo.

"Megs, are you coming?" I called, and he looked up from his conversation.

"What? Oh. Oh! Yes, yes I'm coming!" His walk up the stairs was a bit clumsy, but if that was because of this lack of real meaty legs or the pretty Witch, it was uncertain.

We all, included Roxanne now, walked back into the museum, through the white halls and to the great big door.

"Here we go again, guys!" I said and opened the door for us.

Once more there was the green smoke, and the moustached face of the Warden met us.

"_Why have you come back?"_

"Well, we did as you asked us to!" I called up to him and walked forward with Metro Man's cape in my arms, offering it to him before laying it on the floor. "We got the Wicked Witch of the West's cape! And now we'd like you to keep your promise to us!"

Though his reply was not at all what I had hoped for.

"_Not so fast! Not so fast! I'll have to give this a little more thought. Go away and come back tomorrow!"_

"_Hva faen? _Tomorrow? You promised that if we got you this bloody cape, you'd grant us our wishes!"

"Yeah!" Remmy backed up. "You did!"

"_Are you questioning the great and powerful Wizard of Metro City? I say come back tomorrow! And- U-uh... Bad... robot. No, away with you!"_

"Bad robot?" Megamind repeated, looking at us in case we knew what the head was talking about.

"Robot?" Remmy asked. "R...Robot. Zathia? Zathia, where are you?"

From a corner came the Brainbot's "Bowg!", and it was only then we noticed the green curtains that had been ripped into shreds by Zathia's sharp metal teeth, revealing the _real _Warden behind it. He was still speaking into the microphone while trying to get Zathia away.

"Hush! Away you go! Away I said. Or I'll lock you up!"

All our jaws fell, though Roxanne seemed surprisingly unsurprised.

"_That _is the mighty Wizard of Metro City?" Minion asked, not certain if he was seeing what he thought he was seeing.

Megamind blinked. "I think so!"

The man behind the curtains had now noticed that we'd seen him, and was seriously trying to cover his corner back up again with the shredded curtains as we, in disbelief, approached him, but it was no use.

"Are you the all powerful Wizard of Metro City?" Remmy asked him, and the warden really looked frustrated now.

"I... Um... Yes, yes of course I am. I mean... No! Or..." In the end he had to see defeat, and straightened up again. "Yes, yes I am. I'm just not that good at it."

"Not surprising," I whispered to myself. "He doesn't even fit the character!"

"But what about the heart you promised Minion?" Megamind cried. "And the courage you promised Remmy?"

"And the brain you promised Megamind?" Minion added.

"And what about getting me home?"

The warden shooed it all away with a hand. "You're taking this the wrong way. Anyone can have a brain! Everyone _has _a brain! Even you!" the man barked and turned. Behind him, there was a velvet green bag, and he started to dig through it. "People go to universities with no more of a brain that _you_ have! And then they come out wiser than before. The only thing they have that you don't have is this; a diploma." Handing him the roll, the warden nodded to himself.

Megamind grabbed the diploma and looked at it. "Really? That's it? I had a brain all along, didn't I?"

A tender hand was laid on Megamind's shoulder, and he looked up to see straight into Roxanne's eyes. "When someone keeps telling you that you are stupid, then you get stupid. I know you're smart, Megamind. All you need is to believe in yourself!"

His cheeks once again got that brush of indigo, and his blue lips curved in a smile. "You really think so?"

"I know so."

The short silence after was so specked with feelings, that the rest of us turned away from the two and back to the Warden. We weren't meant to be a part of it anyway.

"What about me?" Remmy asked. "What are you supposed to do about me?"

"Ah, Remmy. All you actually need is to prove for yourself that you're brave. And therefore, you get this!" The Warden once again dug through his velvet bag, pulling up a great big medal. "A medal of courage!"

Taking the medal, Remmy didn't seem too convinced. "Yeah, you know what; I'll just go for a weapon or something. Hey Megs, now that you're smart, do you think you could come up with some sort of gun for me to keep the pigs away from my street?"

Megamind scratched his goatee in thinking. "How about something that wouldn't permanently harm them. Maybe we could de-hydrate them into tiny cubes or something like that?"

"Great idea! Then I could keep those hot dogs away from me!"

I rolled my eyes and turned my attention to Minion, who was trying to peek into the bag.

"What about me? Can I get a heart?"

"Not a heart directly. Because you already have one! In case you haven't noticed; you're a fish! And fish have hearts!"

Said fish froze for a few seconds. "I... I never thought of that!"

"But you should remember that your heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you're loved by others. And therefore you shall have this!" Out of the bag, the Warden pulled out what was unmistakably a pink apron, holding it up so that we could read the text on it.

"Kiss the cook?" I read. "Aw, that's so sweet!"

Grinning from... fin to fin... Minion took it on and fastened it in the back. "It fits perfectly!"

Both Remmy and I pulled ourselves up and gave him one kiss on either side of the sphere, leaving two marks on the glass and an embarrassed, but happy, fish inside.

"What about Miss Fire?" Minion remembered. "How are you going to get her home?"

That was where the Warden froze. "I... um..."

My face fell and I bit my lip before muttering "You don't know, do you?"

"No."

My friends turned to me, sad to see me unhappy. I laid my arms around myself, understanding that even here, getting home wasn't as easy as you'd think.

"I know how to get her home."

Looking up, I saw Roxanne smile.

"You... you do?"

"You've been able to go home all along, Fire."

"I... I have?" I gawked.

"Yes, but there is a catch."

"Of course," Remmy whispered, but I overheard it.

"What?" My heartbeat was rising. So close! Now I could get to bed, finally!

"Yes, Fire," Roxanne said and leaned forward, no longer smiling. "The question is; where do you want to go?"

I blinked. "Home of course."

"And where _is _home?"

Where is home? What kind of question was that? Home was-

Home was...

My body turned to ice water as I gradually understood. "Oh..."

"Is your home in your own world? In Norway with your family? Or have you all along when you said home meant the Lair and your new friends?"

My eyes dropped to the Scarlet Slippers. I hadn't thought of that. Ever since I'd landed on Tighten, I'd been saying I wanted to go home. And all along I _had _meant the Lair. When had that happened? When had I actually begun to consider the Lair home?

"Fire, where do you want to go?"

"I... I don't know!"

"Even flames have to decide."

With suddenly shining eyes, I looked back up to hers blue. "Do I? Can't... Can't you decide on my behalf?"

"I'm sorry, little flame. You're an adult now; you have to decide for yourself."

Once again my eyes fell to the Scarlet Slippers.

I could go home.

I could hug my parents again.

I could go back to normal sized eyes and my real life.

But...

Rising my head and straightening my back, I showed everyone that I'd made my decision. "I want to go back to the Lair!"

Roxanne gave me a stern look. "Then you will have to take whatever comes along there. You will have to go through things you'd never have to in your own world. You'll have to wait even longer on getting back to your family."

"I have decided!"

"Are you sure you don't want to go back to your own world, Fire?"

"No, I want to get back to my family, but," I spoke and leaned forward. "That wouldn't make a good story, now would it?"

She understood.

"All right then, Fire. All you have to do is click your heels three times and say _'there's no place like home'_."

I had one last look at my friends.

"I won't have to say goodbye," I said. "Because I'll see you all soon!"

They smiled and took a few steps back to give me more room.

"We'll see you there, Fire," Megamind said and nodded to me.

So closing my eyes, I took a deep breath.

"OK, here we go." I clicked the heels of my Scarlet Slippers three times, each click sending an echo through the room. Then I said to myself; "There's no place like home. There's no place like home. There's no place like home. There's no..."

* * *

"...place like home. There's no... no... _place like home!"_

Suddenly I sat up, making the blanket fall down and the cool air brush against my chest. I gasped and looked around in the dark, windowless room, before grabbing the translator on the floor next to my mattress.

"_Herregud! Herregud!" _I mumbled to myself as I quickly placed it in my ear before running out of the room, the blanket wrapped around my body.

"Remmy? Megamind? Minion?"

I hurried up the stairs to the second floor and to the door I hoped they would be behind.

"Remmy?"

"What's wrong, Fire?"

They were all there! Even Roxanne, who had probably slept over.

"_Herregud, _guys! I just that the most F'd up dream _ever! _I dreamt that the storage room was a cabin, and it fell on top of Tighten, who was wearing the Scarlet Slippers, and then you came and said you were the Good Witch of the North, and Metro Man was the Wicked Witch of the West-!"

Megamind began to laugh when he heard that last part.

Minion turned a strip of bacon in the pan with his robot body while his fish body was turned the complete opposed way to face me. "Fire, are you sure you shouldn't get dre-"

"-And then you were there, and you were a cowardly gangster or something like that, who wanted courage and not to be afraid of heights anymore. And you were a... a robot who'd rusted stuck and wanted a heart. And you were the scarecrow who needed a brain-"

Stopping to laugh, Megamind frowned. "Hey! I've got a brain! A magnificent one!"

"And I only wanted to go home! But we had to get Metro Man's cape. That was very easy, because he was sick of being wicked anyway. Warden was the Wizard and Bernard was the doorman! But then, when I got to go home-" I spoke so fast no-one barely heard it. Gesticulating with both hands, my blanked almost dropped and I had to quickly grab it before continuing.

"I found out I wanted to go back to the Lair instead of to Norway, otherwise it would make a boring story. And then I clicked my heels three times and now I'm back here!"

Everyone had stopped moving. A piece of scrambled egg fell off Roxanne's fork and the bacon was getting burned.

"Fire," Remmy said. "You're never playing Monopoly before you go to bed ever again!"

* * *

**I'm banned from playing Monopoly with them again...**

**This was ! I spent 10 hours on this, and totally understands if you've skipped this chapter! Christ: the story has 9955 words!**

**Based on the movie, not the book...**

**Remmy really had a problem finding out of she wanted to be the Witch and be a mean bitch, or if she wanted to be the lion and hang out with Zathia. **

**Thank you, 1992, for beating this long chapter!  
**


	41. Chapter 41

**This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill  
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will  
Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain  
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name**

**Remeber the name- Fort minor  
**

* * *

**A 100 % reason to remember the name**

"My turn this time. Question!"

"Huh?" I moved my eyes from the pack of macaroni I'd just picked off the shelf and over to the 'Bernard' with the green eyes.

"My turn," he repeated. "To ask a question."

"Oh! OK, shoot." The pack of macaroni was placed in my shopping basket and I took a look at the grocery list Minion had written to us.

"Why 'Fire'?"

"We need butter," I mumbled before turning my attention back at him. "Why fire? What do you mean? I didn't set anything on fire."

He rolled his eyes and followed me through the store, searching for butter. "No, stupid girl. I meant why did you chose Fire to be your name?"

"Oh!" I stopped walking and tapped the list against my chin. "Well, I'm a Sagittarius."

"So? I'm a Sagittarius too, but I chose Megamind!"

Shrugging, I began walking again, Megamind following a step behind me. "Fire is the element of that Zodiac."

"I found the ham!" Remmy showed up around a corner, throwing the ham into the basket.

"Great. OK, can you find me a pack of tampons? Small."

My fellow teen walked off to fetch me lady things, and Megamind pouted.

"You haven't sent me out to get anything."

"First – I actually fear you _will_ vanish into thin air. This store is _huge _and I don't want to get lost!" That made him chuckle, and I probably made him feel a tad more important than before. "Second – do you really want to go and get my tampons?"

And that made him stop. If it was one thing he feared about us, it was the hormones and our… lady problems. Instead he quickly turned back on the previous track.

"OK. So the only reason you picked Fire is because you're born in December?"

My eyes shifted as I reached out for the butter.

"Um…"

Grinning like a cat that had the fish on the hook, he leaned forward so that he penetrated my personal space. "Go on. There's another reason, isn't there?"

I shrugged; it wasn't that big a deal. "I was a huge W.I.T.C.H fan."

Blinking, he tilted his head. "That… That girl magazine?" Then he began laughing again.

"Hey! It used to be a great magazine!"

"I'm sorry!" he chuckled. "I just can't imagine you read about girly stuff like 'how to get the boy' and 'make your own jewelry'!"

"It wasn't about that! At least not in the beginning." My eyes went glassy as I thought back. "The mid section used to be about magic. Herbs and magical animals and that kind of stuff. The stories used to be so _amazing. _And the drawings! Oh, man, the drawings!"

Megamind lifted a brow. "What's it about now?"

"I'm eighteen; I don't read it anymore."

Once again he leaned in, knowing there was something more in there. "How long _did _you read it?"

My eyes shifted again, but I knew he'd get it out of me anyway. "Until I was sixteen…"

"You read a magazine for little girls until you was sixteen?"

"It wasn't for _little girls! _It was a magazine for young teens! And the quality used to be really good as well! But then the mid section began teaching how to be a girl, the stories dropped and stopped making sense, and the drawings got slobby."

I threw the butter into the basked and headed for the closest thing that was on the list; milk.

"What does the magazine have to do with your name?"

"It was about elements. It was there I found out my element was fire. So I embraced that and it grew on me."

"All righty then. How about B and 92?"

"BFire92?"

"Yes."

Milk was placed in the basket and I kept on explaining. "B is the first letter of my last name. And in English BFire would be read 'be fire', and that's kinda cool, right."

Still curious, Megamind once again tilted his head. "And what exactly _is _your last name?"

I crossed my arms. "Not telling you." Finding it was rather easy anyway. It only took minor research, and if he really wanted to know, he would have found out already. All it took was to 'borrow' my computer.

"OK then. And 92?"

I gave him my best 'serious?' look. "Come on, Megs. I though you was smart."

"What? It doesn't make sense!"

"Yeah it does! I'm born in 1992. It makes a lot of sense."

Now he seemed generally confused. "I thought you said you were eighteen!"

"I am. I'm born in December of 1992. I'll be nineteen in half a year."

Shaking his head, Megamind pointed at me. "Ah, no, no, no. If that was to make _any _sense at all, it would have to be 2011 now."

Now _I _was confused. "Yeah. Isn't it?"

We stared at each other, and I slowly realized what he meant.

"It's _not _2011, is it?"

"No."

A new minute of blinking.

"Then what year is it?"

Megamind opened his mouth. "It's-"

"I have your tampons, Fire! Fire?"

And then everyone in the store began panicking, running away from said 'Fire'.

* * *

**There's a calendar in the movie. The two years closest to 2011 that fits are 2008 and 2014. **

**Of course Megs was interrupted before he got the chance to tell me. **

**But it was rather funny when everyone panicked XD**


	42. Chapter 42

**Once you begin being naughty, it is easier to go on and on, and sooner or later something dreadful happens ~Laura Ingalls Wilder**

* * *

**...**

"Fire, I'll get straight to it," Roxanne said, hovering over me with one hand on her hip and the other behind her back. "Are you sleeping with Megamind?"

_Faen! _I dropped my book and looked up at her, briefly meeting those blue eyes before avoiding them.

"W-why would you think that!" A nervous laughter escaped me as I tried to play it cool.

"I saw it. I even took a picture of it."

_Helvete, helvete, helvete..._

"You... you did..." My face turned bright red. It became worse when she managed to catch my eyes.

As her lips turned into the biggest smile ever, she pulled out the Megamind plushie and the Polaroid picture of me sleeping with it from behind her back. "Busted, Fire."

* * *

**You all have such naughty minds... PERVS!**

...

***Snigger***


	43. Chapter 43

There is one thing about baldness: it's neat. ~Don Herold

* * *

**Haircuts and Compliments**

"Come on! What do you think?"

"Why did you do it?"

Fire grinned and touched the newly coloured hair. "Because I'm a punk at heart, that's why."

With a raised brow, Megamind smirked. "In other words, you're a wannabe."

She sighed. "You really know how to give a girl a compliment, Megs. Thanks. OK; what do you guys think?"

Remmy tilted her head. "You look like a kooch-ball."

"Since I have no idea what that _is_ I'll take it as a compliment. Minion?"

Smiling that friendly smile of his, Minion gently touched one of the coloured locks in her hair. "I think it's nice! Red and orange; like fire. And you look good with the colours, too!"

"See, people!" Fire exclaimed, and patted Minion's furry shoulder. "_This _is how you make a compliment! Now we try again. Megs; what do you think of my new hair?"

"Fine; I don't like it."

Snorting, Fire tossed her hair. "You're just jealous because you don't have any hair you can colour except for that goatee." Taking a quick look down against his belt, she mused. "Or _do you?"_

The reaction was somewhat expected; Megamind turned slightly purple and wrapped his cape around him, as if that could hide his body more. "I am certainly not _je-llus! _I just think that if you were to colour your hair, it should have been blue and black, that's all!"

"And _why _would I pick _your _colours to wear?"

"I've taken you in, I've fed you-"

"Minion feeds us."

"I've bought you clothes. I think I deserve some credit. Instead you colour you hair with _Tighten's _colours!"

The girl froze, blinking. "W-what?"

Remmy gasped and laughed. "You coloured your hair in Tighten's colours! Red and orange! You little traitor, Fire."

"I… I… _Helvete_, I didn't think…"

An amused grin plastered itself on Megamind's face. "Does someone have a weakness for a certain bad boy?"

"I… I… _Faen!"_

"Do you have a thing for gingers, Fire? Or is it the curls?"

"I… _Oh, just shut the fuck up! _No, I don't have a thing for Tighten, even in my wildest dreams, OK!"

Still amused, Megamind wagged a finger at her. "Language, young lady!"

"Oh, you're just _so_ jealous on the fact that I have hair that you have to tease me, is that it? Like a fifth grader!"

"I am _not_ like a fifth grader!"

"Of course you're not, Megs. You're a real mature guy," she shot back in a tone dripping with

sarcasm.

"Now, listen here you little… little kooch-ball, you! I'm an adult! Not some kid who has to tease because I'm _je-llus!"_

"Come on, admit it; you like my hair, but you're trying to convince everyone you don't."

"Like you're any better-"

Minion sighed and looked down at Remmy. "Want to go and buy some doughnuts?"

"Please."

* * *

**Yes, guys, I AM alive. I've just been on a three week interrail trip, taken my lisence and getting ready to move. But I'm still here and ready to write ^^**  
**Actually, it was Fluffy who said my hair looked like a kooch-ball, but if Fluffy can say it, so can Remmy. They are like two drops of water. If you wanna see how it looks like then go to my Deviantart and take a look.**


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